Why haven’t you committed suicide yet?

[red_pen]

don't know how my mom will take it.
don't wanna end up a veggie.
genuinely scared of death.
still have hope that i can get better, and life will improve.

 

[Evermore]

Fear of failure ,the dying process and the possibilities of what could come after death but the main reason I'm still here is guilt . My suicide would destroy my family. I'm a 25 year old adult and my parents said they wouldn't cope if I moved out , i can't imagine what my death would do to them.

 

[AlreadyGone]

Decided to switch methods. So i am currently in the process of obtaining materials for new method.

 

[Oh_dear_how_Gastly]

1. I'm a coward and am afraid of dying.
2. There is between a 90 and 100% chance that at least two people will ctb as a result of me ctbing and I feel guilty as fuck I don't want to ruin everyone's life I just want to stop hurting

 

[Bct]

Just got my wage from the last job after being unpaid for more than 2 months. Finally able to finish my debt.

Now I need to fight my SI & be in a right mood to end myself. Hopefully I can do it ASAP.

 

[SpottedPanda]

It's likely I would have been gone, if I'd have found the sweet spot, and the belt would have been adequate for pressure. As things stand, I'm just waiting to feel the urge, mixed with the capacity to apply a peaceful method, with what's at hand

 

[lostangel]

Afraid of becoming vegetable/ not being in a rush to die.

 

[giles corey]

my mother. literally nothing else

 

[AnxietyAttack44]

Im still too scared to hurt mybpuppies. Maybe after theyre rehomed

 

[who doesn't matter]

So, basically, the current circumstances + SI are the major reasons for everyone which also includes me.

 

[BigLucs]

Just want to enjoy my last 4th with a few friends. Will be gone next week.

 

[Meditation guide]

I wish I knew a heroine addict as that sounds pretty ideal, so I could get some but no idea how to "shoot up" etc. What stops me is no easy way out.

 

[GonnaGoBye]

My SN hasn't arrived yet. Will ctb once arrived, or after this pandemic cause fudge covid.

 

[Lorntroubles]

It's going pretty well and headed in the right direction. Now I have to wait for the right timing with this pandemic crap.

 

[Lookingtodie]

I'm in catatonia

 

[il4]

was scared of becoming a vegetable too.. at this point, I feel like I need to finish a few projects first. I'm a bit of a perfectionist so "finishing" life before I go would make me feel more at ease and I'd be able to have no regrets while CTBing.

 

[4eyebiped]

I haven't because I am a sour old bastard. I want to sell everything off that I have, find some way to enjoy it till I am broke and then peacefully die. I have to justify living all this time somehow. The thoughts of leaving my shit behind free for others to enjoy while I couldn't... nah!

 

[Weightoftheworld]

Because I know my kids love me more than anyone else on this earth, I live through misery for them.

 

[Hiraeth]

Good question.

It just has never felt like the right time. I'm more afraid to hurt other people in my life, so I just let myself hurt. I also have good portions of life where I think "hey, maybe it isn't so bad" but its all just a fake emotion when that happens so my bad i guess.

 

[Helpneedtips]

I have no idea, honestly. Everyday, I promise myself, today is it. I'm finally going to die: I have my tools setup, I have my plan made up, and then I back out at the last minute and wake up the next day in disappointment that I'm still alive.

Emotionally, I don't have anything I'm attached to or particularly look forward too, so I guess my SI just keeps me going, somehow

 

[BridgeJumper]

Because Im too cowardly to embrace death.

 

[Chiyuki99]

80% because I am really scared of ending up in hell
20% because I still have hope and because I don't want to hurt the people I love

 

[RRH]

Waiting on my N to arrive.

 

[Welp]

There are 2 more rounds of experimental treatments to try before I ctb.
I'd prefer that a cure happens, but the odds are stacked against me.
I have a lot in life that I want to stick around for.
But, alas, I wound up with a med-resistant-parasite that is an absolutely miserable experience, and I simply don't want to live with it :/

 

[Mr2005]

I don't know. Method, other people, not wanting this fountain of knowledge to go to waste, deserving to suffer so I stay alive

 

[Notwinnernotawin]

1) Fear of failure
2) Fear and pain of leaving my mom and my cat behind on their own

 

[BrokenBeing]

Fear of being found and 'rescued'

 

[MsMaudlin]

CV 19 restrictions of funerals (I have planned mine meticulously) and the fact I have people who need me at the moment.
❤

 

[nerve]

The fear of hurting myself enough that I lose the mental/physical capacity to CTB was a big reasom for me before SN became a thing.

I have this ancient dog who would be euthanized if I wasn't there to take care of him. Dying & leaving that responsibility to someone else seems like a really shitty thing to do. Every year I think "okay, there's no way he's going to make it to the end of the year" but then he does!

 

[Bleachedwhale]

I've tried 3 times now. The last time I was very close in succeeding. I hoarded up alot of meds took them then when I got dozey I duck taped a garbage bag around my head. I woke up in ICU with a iv in each arm amd a cathadere. Was very disappointing to have failed. Then spent 3 weeks in a psych ward. I tired again 2 nights ago, a simple hanging from my closet. You know the passout type. But as soon as I felt all the blood rushing to my face I sit back up to relieve the pressure. I'll probly go back to the method I used before just take a few more pills.