Why does it hurt?

[Some place nice]

So I just found out the guy that was just using me for my body deleted our chat. I was so obsessed with him and I loved him so hard but, I found someone better. Someone I can call my home. So why does it upset me? I never am going back to that guy even if me and the love of my life break up, I'm never looking back. I dont want it too hurt. He was a bad man who used me. So why does it hurt so bad? I'm not telling my partner about this bc I dont want to hurt them. They is so nice and sensitive and has trauma from their last relationship. I just dont want it too hurt, not for him, but it does... I just want it too stop...

 

[Dangerdonkey333]

It's trauma, it hurts. Even if good is starting to come to you. But the more you focus on your new love, and make better memories to replace the traumatic one. The more it will heal over time. It won't be overnight. But I believe you can work to make your past matter less and less and leave it behind you.

 

[cryone]

Not sure if this is the reason for you, but for me the issue was I overlooked everything negative and had a distorted view of the relationship. So, when my ex cut me off, I felt hurt. I felt as if I lost someone great. In reality, he's a shit person who never cared about me. Even when I know this I'm still delusional. The other factor is simply that this is rejection. Rejection will hurt. Someone is deliberately trying to say they don't want you anymore.