Ch92921
The call of the void
- Dec 29, 2018
- 909
I'm in same boat, I don't think anything will help because my depression is specific to a traumatic event...I owe it to those close to me to try deep brain stimulation, everything else hasn't worked. I don't know how long I can stay alive though, the Nembutal in my fridge is really tempting. Every day I think about renting a hotel room and ending it.
OP I feel you on that last part...It sounds disastrous when I say it like this, but I genuinely want to know.
For me, I just hope to start a new life after college. Start fresh, that's what people say. I don't have a family or anything even remotely close to relationship and I never had. I was never loved as a child. I want to change my name and never speak to anyone from my life ever again.
I just want to find out how love feels like. I was wondering how wonderful it must be to sleep with someone's arms around you or just simply holding hands with another human?
The help of the public health service, my cats and because the government helps me paying the mortgage, food, and the basics to survive.It sounds disastrous when I say it like this, but I genuinely want to know.
For me, I just hope to start a new life after college. Start fresh, that's what people say. I don't have a family or anything even remotely close to relationship and I never had. I was never loved as a child. I want to change my name and never speak to anyone from my life ever again.
I just want to find out how love feels like. I was wondering how wonderful it must be to sleep with someone's arms around you or just simply holding hands with another human?
This, except the pays extremely well partI have a good job. It pays extremely well. I have my own apartment. I have friends. I still have family. And I guess I still have stuff I like doing.
Yet neither of these things are why I'm still alive.
The only reason I'm still alive is because suicide is a really hard thing to pull off. And even the "best methods" have some form of risk to them.
If any of us here could just swallow a pill and die peacefully, I think a lot of people wouldn't be here anymore.