why are you still here

[suicidalpushpop]

for me? it's fear. fear of messing up. fear of SN not working. fear of harming myself and not being successful. if i wasn't afraid.. i'd be gone.. what about you?

 

[makethepainstop]

Waiting on my sn to arrive....

 

[Banshee]

I'm 5000km away from my home and guns.

 

[akirat9]

fear of failing

 

[Deadweight]

I have a son, he's already struggling, killing myself will just fuck him up more. I have to keep trying

 

[DunnoWhyButYeah]

I can't leave my kids.

 

[Mofreeko]

crossing my fingers for nuclear war.

 

[HermitLonerGuy]

i have no proper methods yet .

 

[jjwtn26]

Im scared to do it. Plus the even bigger reason is I don't want to ruin my mom's life. If I ever work up the courage to kill myself it will be after she is gone.

 

[The Eeyorish One]

For me it's a few reasons.
1. Survival instinct is really hard to overcome.
2. If I fail I know I will get dumped and wind up homeless.
3. I'm not good with uncertainty… nothing is 100% and I really don't want to end up a vegetable.
4. I don't want to scar the people I care about so I have no plans to ever do it at home which just makes it that much harder to do.

Additionally, sometimes I find some minor thing to keep me going. Things like one of my cats coming and cuddling me for a bit or something.

 

[pinnsvin]

I have 2 reasons:
1. I'm afraid of failure
2. I have a really close friend, whom I struggle leaving behind. They know about me being suicidal, and they will understand once I leave.
I hope I can CTB soon!

 

[yourrealname]

i don't have my antiemetics yet

 

[Shinobi]

I just got married 4 days ago I don't want to leave my husband behind, and I can't just kill myself easily since I am worried that a lot of people would feel bad because of me

 

[lionetta12]

for me? it's fear. fear of messing up. fear of SN not working. fear of harming myself and not being successful. if i wasn't afraid.. i'd be gone.. what about you?

Scared of messing up my next attempt, as I've failed several already.

 

[Sick of it all]

I have a son, he's already struggling, killing myself will just fuck him up more. I have to keep trying

I'm in the same boat.

 

[Yalu]

I don't even know why
wbu?

 

[SunshineAndSuicide]

I'm in limbo, trying to decide if I want to try one last time to better my life and treat my mental health issues.

 

[Tiny Little Tree]

I think part of me is using procrastination as a survival mechanism.

 

[looseye]

I want to outlive my cat. She's a house cat, has no life outside the four walls of my parents' home, and she's always happy beyond belief when I visit for the weekend. Count on me, cute catty cat cat, I'll visit you again

 

[FuneralCry]

The only real reason as to why I still continue enduring this existence is because as I have mentioned many times on here, actually going through with suicide can be difficult. There is the problem of the fear of failure and also the fact that there is limited access to methods for me.

We live in this pro suffering society where even planning to die can be complicated and of course there is also the issue of the more desirable methods being restricted. It would be ideal to have the option to just pass away in my sleep and finally leave all of the suffering behind.

To me it's more rational to leave this world than to endure this existence. Nothing could ever make me want to stay here and that is a fact. But eventually I will be gone no matter what, I will have to find a way, and I won't reach old age, I will make sure of that.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Think I have some embarrassing teenage screeds lying around somewhere, I must dispose of them. Otherwise, I guess I'm doing ok enough to not feel like the suffering calculation really checks out at the moment. Cardio, weights, block the thoughts, ignore the normies.

 

[nolifer]

Methods are lacking in research which creates doubt about success and they're not easily available.

Also have to keep an income coming in which takes up 90% of my time because I don't want to end up homeless and starving before I ctb.

 

[outrider567]

Can't depart until my brother departs, he has about 2 or 3 months

 

[StolenLife]

Idiot perfectionist in me wants to wait until before Christmas holidays so that I can have some time in case I survive because I fear failing my subjects as a consequence.

 

[Felix007]

im hoping my antiemetics dont get seized at customs, also waiting for a day where i am home alone to do it, also hoping that i will be able to take all of the caffeine pills without vomiting them out... all i know is I dont want to witness my 26th birthday (coming up in november)...

 

[Badatlove]

Im very broke, need a job first for buying the right supplies so im 100% sure ctb will work. And I would also still love to go to the amazone to work with ayahuasca and travel, never been out of europe

 

[BGooG]

I have a son, he's already struggling, killing myself will just fuck him up more. I have to keep trying

My daughter. She's in a bad way, and if I died I'm afraid it'd push her over the edge.

 

[AllAboard]

Because finding sn is hard, every site requires school or business credentials

 

[highmaintenancebolt]

Cause I am afraid that it will be painful. I plan to use a gun but even with a point blank shot to the head I have fears that I will be the unlucky 1%.

 

[damaged_soul]

For me it's the exact same reason as you, I am too afraid and cowardly. Also, suicide is very stressful and difficult.