I have been molested twice before even entering the year where i turned 18 by different people in 10 year gap...my 2nd molester was my close cousin (11 year older than me) and had been sexually grooming me for past 4 years before the final molestation ( i was molested for 2 months) though he was twisted and played a lot of mind games on me..i just still can't grasp why he never showed an ounce of fear regarding my parents knowing or people i know with connection and even his own family but he was always scared of my bf ( to the point he showed anxiety while asking " what if my bf knows about the abuse"( he talked about him in wishpers, always made sure i wasn't in the area he lived in, etc) but till date talks free to my father...i just can't get the reason why he was scared of a boy 11 years younger than him??
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ApparentlyNot
Nothing
- Jul 8, 2023
- 183
He may have felt like your bf was someone who would unequivocally believe you, while he believed in his deniability or ability to manipulate those other people in your life, perhaps due to proximity to him as family. Or perhaps it was easiest to empathize with your boyfriend due to his own selfish reasons, eg "I wouldn't want someone doing that to MY partner and I would hurt them if they did" so he feels afraid. I really don't know, but I am so sorry for what you went through, I know you really want to make sense of this. Something in your boyfriend threatened his sense of power, secrecy, and safety. I hope you find healing. Sending much love.
That's the thing though..my bf is not at all protective of me...and it's not like my bf can hurt that guy cuz me and my bf are students with no income and 11 years younger than him
I have stoped feeling safe anywhere( including my own home) and also lowkey showing signs of hallucinations ( auditory)
Average Joe
Forsaken One
- Nov 5, 2019
- 419
I really wish I knew, it's probably almost impossible to get into the mindset of that person (I'm using the term person very lightly for lack of a better word).
I guess he assumes that your boyfriend will believe you, not necessarily trying to protect you but it's 2v1. I mean 2v1, not in terms of fighting but in terms of believability. As you said, he played mind tricks or manipulated you. So I'm guessing he thinks/thought that he could turn it around make you seem like a liar. Whereas it's easier to believe 2 people instead of just you.
Do you mind me asking if you've tried to report him?
I'm so so so sorry you've experienced this. I was sexually abused/raped when I was 9 and it's just uncomprehendable as to why it happened.
I wish I had something useful to say, but I believe you and your feelings are valid.
I am so sorry you experienced that and even though i know a bit about how the mind of a rapists works( after experiencing molestation by 2 people) some parts are still too twisted to comprehend and no i won't report him..i just want to ctb at this point even if it means using my last resort ..i hope you recover soon and be happy and have a peaceful lifeā”
