Discussion Who's your favorite SanctionedSuicide member/crush?

[tetra]

Skelly Nevhilim is everyone's favorite <3

 

[Chili]

I know for a fact that people are just waiting on mentioning me... /s

View attachment 206967

How'd you know ...

 

[Somewhat Suicidal]

All the kind souls who have been talking to me, maybe that is my problem

Especially @VanillaCake who has been very kind to me (and seems to always have an open ear this way with lots of others as well) and @webb&flow for his/hers extremely well thought out posts that have opened a new perspective for me on 2 things already.

 

[Lost in a Nightmare]

It's hard to pick a favorite as there are a lot of good people here, but if I had to pick a crush, I would say it was my ex-girlfriend who I met on here 3 years ago. I don't want to say her name publicly because it wouldn't feel right, considering she isn't alive anymore and I found out in a bad way. I will only tell close friends who she is if they ask in private messages.

 

[SASU-KE]

I like a lot of the members here and have a lot in common with several people here.

That being said, I'm trying to recover and get better so I'm spending less time on the site.

 

[Forveleth]

I like a lot of the members here and have a lot in common with several people here.

That being said, I'm trying to recover and get better so I'm spending less time on the site.

Hey, that's amazing to hear! Hope it works out for you.
(also your signature is fantastic)

 

[nitrogenous]

Forever my favourite best friend @Natbee x

 

[pepperfarmer]

I personally appreciate @webb&flow (/p). Their posts strike me as that of someone well read and intelligent, and they've been nothing but kind to me. I'm kind of jealous, I wish I was able to just casually quote Seneca

 

[Lost in a Nightmare]

Hey, that's amazing to hear! Hope it works out for you.
(also your signature is fantastic)

I didn't notice Sasu-ke's signature before but I love it too haha. Gave me a good laugh.

 

[webb&flow]

i'm a bit hesitant to say "xyz person is my favorite" because i'm a bit worried other people might see my response and feel "less" valued for it. so for anyone reading this who knows me, and has interacted with me, know that i personally appreciate you and that i truly do value your words. ^^ that being said... i would like to voice my appreciation in particular at this very moment ^^

@pepperfarmer, for many reasons, but one very real one being their razor-sharp insight, and the really elegant pace they have in their writing and thought; they're genuinely a force to be reckoned with when it comes to being insightful—and honestly I write this to you after a good evening of having pondered many things, and having been brought to realization of a key aspect, a realization that was inspired by revelatory words from them, in a turn of discussion where their thought frankly grew at an aweshocking swift pace.

What is your opinion on 10th September (world suicide prevention day.)?

I mostly feel negative towards it because it causes for barriers nets and fencesand regulations to be put in place.

www.sanctioned-suicide.net

if you read this thread and the evolution of their thought over the course of it, you will find the work of a mind not only swift when it comes to wording things, but a genuinely thoughtful soul—a really refreshing cocktail of both compassion and reason. when it comes to key matters like this regarding pain, a careful sense of humanity and compassion is a great giver of insight, due to emotions being key to the actual functioning at hand.

Anyways, I could probably write you many more paragraphs about this person's style, and why I appreciate it so much, and how their own personal life history plays into it (not that I would ever just divulge that on a whim in public forumspace, but you get the picture ^^) and why I basically view this person as something of a perfect storm when it comes to thought and expression. It's my own opinion that having a linguistic acumen also blooms out from the mind a cognitive acumen as well; because it is way easier to forget what we struggle to express into language. I think people like pepperfarmer who are able to elegantly pack critical ideas into words that so clearly unpack and bloom themselves in such a way that it feels a key revelation unfurls, and will continue to unfurl in time to come, are more than artists of ideas, but archivists of their own sentiments; people who keep alive that "gleam of light which flashes across the mind from within" by caring enough (and daring) to say what they think, for reasons I sincerely suspect to be sincerely virtuous. I mean this: it takes both hearts and guts and spirits—and really, breath of care and curiosity together more than all of that—to not only figure out but openly express the kinds of ideas that pepper shares.

they're not only genuinely a good writer, but… genuinely a good person. the level of insight expressed, the understanding of the social components that relate into what people think, these are all inspirations that not only indicate them coming from a place of genuine introspection about the tender humanity that lays not just in us but in the life of others too, but inspirations that have the power to make us more moral, just by reflecting on them, just by letting our souls wander into the damningly forgiving implications they have the spirits to arouse. i think that's a notable thing; to not only be able to hone this light inside of you and turn it into words, but to lead any other into gazing into this, a kind of light that when gazed into allows one to see oneself better too. if you're an appreciator of the first Delphic maxim ("know thyself"), i think you would be bound to appreciate the significance of their words and ideas :3.

anyways… for people here who say i am a good writer…… i thank you sincerely, and i can't deny i feel some truth in this… but i also sincerely direct such people to the words of pepperfarmer, too >;3. really, this is an artist of brevity and intensity you have here. reading their words most of the time feels like gazing through glass into what they mean. or, even better, it feels like you're really unfurling something revelatory, something that you need to think more on to truly know in and out. if you ever get that feeling when reading their words… chase that feeling. sit with their words. hell, even memorize them if you want!! if they write something that feels important yet you feel you don't grasp it yet, sit with those words, read through carefully, and accept that you'll have time to think through on what it means and the implications of it. it really is a lovely thing to have in this world.

and it's not everyday you're lucky enough to cross paths with such an individual; and i personally thank you, pepperfarmer, for influencing me as a person; i'm honoured to have my own thought influenced by yours ^^.

---

Spoiler: in case i made any reader feel insignificant lol

and for anyone who may read all this and feel a sensation like this: "I could never be like that. I wish I could be like that.", then i have very specific and very personal words for you ♥. such "talents" are not gifted in one fell swoop nor stolen from some far off place on a single fiery occasion (what, do you take me and pepper and anyone of the like for Prometheus? x3). such talents are not born. i will theorize how such words come about. not come from what secretes from genes, not from mere accreditation. to write in such a way that others can find solace and perhaps even revelation in it, comes from drives that both you and i have .

in the same way one may love music, or singing, and wish to feel what it is like to make such a resonance or vibration from within oneself, within one's own ears or vocal channel, one may love words, and what it is like to play with them, to see how they may be used. such familiarity with words comes from interacting with them not merely or convenience or ulterior motive, but from permitting oneself to push those words, to express more than what may feel easy to.

to write in a way that can touch others, one may not even need to be very experienced in writing: just saying what you feel and think, and in your own time just practicing writing not as if it is any serious study but merely just to see what comes out or to express or record some emotion or experience or thought that came to thee, just continuing to do that, that grows one's expression to however much one may ♥.

anyways, i could go on forever about what i think would help one feel more with words, haha. lean into the pressure of struggling to express something, and continue to press forth, for that right word. to search for that, to ponder for that, to wonder for that; that can be painful, but it is a beautiful thing, too ♥.

i sincerely thank pepperfarmer for their genuine care of humanity and that thrilling thing they have for words; both of these things soothe my souls. And frankly, I'm deeply grateful to have been able to discover the inspirations I have today, spurred by the realizations pepper has shared just close to a couple days ago too; and honestly, I really radically appreciate you too, pepper; and it really does deeply touch me to have you invoke me; and I want to invoke you too, because honestly, you truly are a notable person, and it really is spiritively refreshing to read your words and hear your thoughts. I want to express that I wish there were more people like you in the world, pepper. And I think there are many people in this world right now who are growing and exploring in their own ways, and I hope you will meet these people too, pepper. I have a strong conviction that if these people—wherever they may be along their journeys—run into you, that they would be utterly awespired by your nift for a sharp turn of phrase. And for your appreciation for a well-clarified thought, too. Thanks for sharing your spirits and notions. It really is a gift that keeps on giving.

 

[NonEssential]

Idk if you should get too attached to anyone in here, they could be gone any day now.

 

[Somewhat Suicidal]

omg @webb&flow you did it again xD

Idk if you should get too attached to anyone in here, they could be gone any day now.

Need to be definitely selective about who, but there's a lot people here aren't actively suicidal or planning their demise. Quite a few are even more engaged in recovery than ctb planning or that part of the forum in general.

 

[struggles_inc]

There was a cop guy on here. I actually managed to talk to him a little. He seemed really nice. I wonder how things are going for him nowadays.
Ah, here you are @COP2CON. You're my favourite person on here. Hope you're doing alright.

 

[CatLvr]

I like a lot of the members here and have a lot in common with several people here.

That being said, I'm trying to recover and get better so I'm spending less time on the site.

There are so many people hear who helped me at a time when I thought things were hopeless -- @Dante_ @whywere I dunno why but I can't tag Ophelia and a few folks who are no longer here.

Like you I am working on changing my life (what a thing for an OLD lady to do) so I have been staying off he internet. Or at least trying to. I have to admit, some days I don't know why I bother but most of the time it is not hard to look around and see how spending so much time on my phone was not doing my mental or physical health any good at all.

There was a cop guy on here. I actually managed to talk to him a little. He seemed really nice. I wonder how things are going for him nowadays.
Ah, here you are @COP2CON. You're my favourite person on here. Hope you're doing alright.

Yep, he is one of the good ones. I noticed he is not taking messages any longer. He was one of the guys I was actually sticking my head back in the door to check on. I, too, hope he is doing okay.

 

[emptywings]

Ahora tienes la oportunidad de decirles cómo te sientes antes de que sea demasiado tarde.

@imsorryspike love reading your posts T.T

 

[SASU-KE]

There are so many people hear who helped me at a time when I thought things were hopeless -- @Dante_ @whywere I dunno why but I can't tag Ophelia and a few folks who are no longer here.

Like you I am working on changing my life (what a thing for an OLD lady to do) so I have been staying off he internet. Or at least trying to. I have to admit, some days I don't know why I bother but most of the time it is not hard to look around and see how spending so much time on my phone was not doing my mental or physical health any good at all.

Ophelia officially left and deleted her account.She made a thread as well on her departure.

I will also be reducing my Internet time going forward. I've started gardening and slowly spending more time around plants. Planning on getting a pet as well. Doing research on that though,it needs to be well thought out

 

[CatLvr]

Ophelia officially left and deleted her account.She made a thread as well on her departure.

I will also be reducing my Internet time going forward. I've started gardening and slowly spending more time around plants. Planning on getting a pet as well. Doing research on that though,it needs to be well thought out

Ahhhh, I see. I need to message her and check in then. The weather here has been an absolute bitch the last couple of months and so my chronic pain has been way worse than usual. I am grateful I am old and spent the majority of my life living below my means so I could save because I am pretty sure I would have gotten canned in the last few weeks if I actually had to have a job to survive.

Gardening is the second most cathartic thing I have ever pursued. Right now I am working out a master plan to turn my entire front yard into a cottage-like garden with pollinators to draw in honey bees and also plant perennial vegetables and fruits so I can have seasonal stuff to eat.

My pets being, though, they are the first. What kind of pet are you thinking about?? Dog? Cat? Bird(s)? Fish? Reptile? Ferret? Wildlife Rehabber?? (Okay, not pets in the traditional sense of the word bit still -- I have had skunks, possums, racoons, foxes, coyotes, all kinds of songbirds and prey birds, turtles ... Gosh, I feel like I am missing something -- OH!! Bobcat! How could I forget Bob?? ) Anyway, my pets are why I am still here. They do me so much good. I hope it works out that way for you, also! Shoot even animals that people traditionally keep for food (chickens, ducks, quail, rabbits) make good pets, and are not hard to care for.

Gosh ... Can you tell I am a little bit passionate about my friends? Lol

 

[yui_suicisawa]

@komakun is a great poster and my first follower! Idk about using the word crush however ^_^;;;

 

[E5463656]

imagine having a fp from sasu hahah couldn't be me /s

 

[komakun]

@komakun is a great poster and my first follower! Idk about using the word crush however ^_^;;;

:'3 tysm I loved your profile pic hehe and you also have great posts <3

 

[yui_suicisawa]

Tysm, I I hope we both catch the bus and find peace ^_^

 

[Natbee]

Forever my favourite best friend @Natbee x

Who knew you could find your bestie in a suicide Webchat

 

[Passenger4224]

I like a lot of the members here and have a lot in common with several people here.

That being said, I'm trying to recover and get better so I'm spending less time on the site.

I was recently thinking "hey I haven't seen that guy with the epic animated profile pictures post in a while". Glad you are recovering!! All of us at SaSu are cheering you on

 

[ela]

no one would ever mention me.

 

[MissAbyss]

I don't play favorites.

 

[ThroughTheLight]

@rotthjärta

I miss her :(

 

[lostinthecha0s]

@100memoryleaks
She was a beautiful soul who had so much on her plate. I'll miss her.

 

[Proceed]

Not crushes but I'll mention some users that I like (at least the ones I could remember).

@mlha and @not-2-b-the-answer cuz they post in the music threads.

@violetforever - we've had some good chats I think.

 

[violetforever]

Not crushes but I'll mention some users that I like (at least the ones I could remember).

@mlha and @not-2-b-the-answer cuz they post in the music threads.

@violetforever - we've had some good chats I think.

omg thank u im honored to be mentioned lol <3 i like u too!

 

[Somewhat Suicidal]

I have to add @Lotus1818 and Moonicide to my all time MVPs because this is just 'amazing' – as a service to the community.
I don't know if Lotus is still with us as this point or if she is if she's still active, but they both deserve an honorable mention for doing this and going through the experience. This is a copy pasta from a post I already did elsewhere, but I feel like this deserves more attention as it might help countless people:

The goodbye thread of Moonicide (successful SN suicide in early 2020) and the documentation of her suicide by her friend Lotus1818 via webcam was especially touching. It's quite heavy stuff compared to the rather abstract descriptions one usually gets about the process. Made the whole thing a lot more real for me – as much that I had physiological reactions during some of the heavy passages – and was honestly simply heartbreaking to read at times.
But nonetheless it might be useful info for anyone who is interested in this method, so in case someone else wants to have a look. It might also serve as a good self check on whether or not someone wants to actually ctb themselves. Unless you can read these threads and are still convinced you probably don't really want to do it, I would say:

trigger warning complete description from someone who witnessed SN suicide via webcam:

FIRST EVER SN DOCUMENTATION

Dear everyone, This thread will be about the documentation of the cbt of user @Moonicide (29 years old) Who took her life on Jan 12th at 00:30 EST. She was a dear friend of mine that I met on this forum. She loved this forum and it's users. The forum helped her allot during her last days. And...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Goodbye thread of Moonicide:

Fly Me to the Moon -- Goodbye, my love.

So here's my goodbye thread as promised! My time is near and I would never leave without saying goodbye to all the lovely people I've encountered here. You have all been so sweet, kind, and supportive towards me. I've received such sweet messages from a few of you, and I've also made a few...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Honestly I feel both these should be linked in the the SN megathread or somewhere similar as they provide unique insight and documentation of what to expect. Maybe someone more experienced knows how to bring this to the mods attention...