Who else hates the end of the year?

[uselesslife2002]

Isn't it kind of an awful feeling when the year ends and you're still stuck in the same place and position as before. And also when you accomplished nothing. It just feels like every year that passes is the same and nothing changes no matter how hard I try. Its just another reminder that yeah you're alive another year and nothing good will happen. Life is just about luck if I only have gotten lucky I probably would of loved life

 

[lifeisbutadream]

Lonely people hate this time of the year.

 

[Fat Purple Fig]

Yup, I totally hear you. Thanks for writing this, it helps me feel less alone. Nov-January is the worst time for me. All of the fake Hallmark holidays and reminders of how my life is not the way I want it to be. It's so hard.

 

[mdmd500]

Definitely a hard time. The pressure of Christmas and New Year, and you're right, I also always have that feeling of "oh another year has gone, and this and that hasn't changed". I can feel a little bit of optimism creep in at the start of the year, but unfortunately it doesn't last for very long.

 

[HermitLonerGuy]

too many people at my trashy aparment building home for the holidays, kids running around making noise upstairs screaming ugh i cant wait till they all go back to work and school. Jan cant come fast enough.

 

[Papilio_polyxenes]

Honestly, it's a motivating factor in my desire to see an end to my life on a quicker timetable - in addition to my unsolvable circumstances.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I wish if were January already. I'm trying to see the holidays through till I go, but the flames are getting hotter and hotter.

 

[uselesslife2002]

too many people at my trashy aparment building home for the holidays, kids running around making noise upstairs screaming ugh i cant wait till they all go back to work and school. Jan cant come fast enough.

Can't wait for the Christmas season to be older I hate it

 

[Ligottian]

My rock bottom time of the year is just before Thanksgiving until just aft New Years.

 

[FuneralCry]

Yes, I just hate it when another year is about to have passed and yet I'm still trapped here when I could already be peacefully not existing. There really is no point or benefit to all these endless days and years, it's such a burden having to continue to exist and staying here is only ever delaying the inevitable after all.

I really don't want to face next year but unfortunately I will very likely still be here and of course as time goes on life will continue to get more tiring and torturous with the amount of suffering being experienced increasing. Suicide really should be more straightforward for us, I just hate the fact how we even have to struggle so much to finally set ourselves free from an existence that we never asked for.

 

[donealready]

Really wasn't planning to be here for Christmas. Revising method, but really, really fucked off that I will be going through another Christmas. You think it would get easier. It doesn't.

 

[autistocracy]

I'm right there with you. I also fucking hate Christmas with a passion (especially the music), so the end of the year is just awful.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah, definitely. Have unpleasant family memories surrounding Christmas and workwise, it used to be the most stressful time for me, so I've hated it for decades.

New year is also shit- I agree- because looking back and looking forward both look bad. Think it just makes it worse that a lot of people love this time of year and think we're really weird for hating it. Plus, it makes me so lethargic feeling cold for months on end. You're not alone.

 

[Raven2]

Yeah agreed find this time of the year hard. I look back at what I've achieved and yet again absolutely nothing. I've just managed to exist for another year not really living just plodding on. Then the 1st jan comes around and I realise I've got another year of this shitty life to live thats when I feel most down I think.

 

[CTB Dream]

Real hard see nrw year all sam see no diff stuck trap life no method nothing stay stay now what only vege keep worse real need escap this scary no wabt new year want leave soon possible , year mean more torture 300 day

 

[MovingOn]

I have 0 feelings towards it aside from it being a reminder that humans are kind of robotic; it's the same old yearly festivities being held. It's just silly, and I don't care.

 

[NoLightRemains]

I've never really been happy about the holiday season. Holidays were often painful and stressful growing up, and when I was working I often worked the holidays so it was just a bigger paycheck for me.

Instead of reflecting on new years, I tend to reflect upon my last year and have the worst depression around my birthday in April. I think I will make it to my birthday and CTB within a few weeks after.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Holidays, especially xmas sucks. What I truly want, money and gifting cannot get me.

 

[outrider567]

I hate each day but the holidays are tougher

 

[Wannagonow]

Holidays were never horrible for me growing up. However, for the last 30+ years the end of the year and New Years eve have not been a good time of year. My bipolar depression goes into overdrive in late fall/winter. I'm lonely, alone and not looking forward to another year.

 

[Dbd8djddi]

Not really. I never really cared about "special" days like New Year's Eve, Christmas or my birthday. It's just a normal day to me like any other. Nothing really changes anyway, new year, same old bullshit.

 

[spixs_macaw]

I'm right there with you. I also fucking hate Christmas with a passion (especially the music), so the end of the year is just awful.

It is! This year I've decided to stay at home alone. I live in another country than my family so I'll just tell them that I'll spend the holidays with some friends. Just want to spend my time here online; this gives me comfort right now.

 

[ARW3N]

Yes, the end of the year is a reminder that I've once again failed to end my life.

 

[SamTam33]

A December doesn't pass without me listening to Josh Groban's version of 'My December' on repeat and falling completely apart. Crumbling like some stale crackers.

What I wouldn't give to have a normal December.

 

[hellispink]

End of year reminds what a failure i am

 

[yyytry]

It really fucking hurts.

Before my mom died when I was 16, I used to LOVE setting up the Christmas tree. It was an old artificial tree, handmade ornaments, vintage ornaments…every year I would change the tinsel color theme.

Now I can't even access the ornaments. Or that fake tree I grew up with. I loved it so much.

Christmas fucking kills me.
Sometimes I want to go back to the house, ring the doorbell, and shoot myself in the mouth when it opens.
At least I would've returned home. And in some ways claim my home back. Even if I'm dead. They will know who they took it from. Every time they walk thru the front door.

A dark fantasy of mine. Because I can't have Christmas anymore.

 

[zeenatax]

I used to love it in happier times but now I dread it.

 

[EllmoM8]

Isn't it kind of an awful feeling when the year ends and you're still stuck in the same place and position as before. And also when you accomplished nothing. It just feels like every year that passes is the same and nothing changes no matter how hard I try. Its just another reminder that yeah you're alive another year and nothing good will happen. Life is just about luck if I only have gotten lucky I probably would of loved life

I'm hoping to use it as a jumping off point literally

 

[yyytry]

It really fucking hurts.

Before my mom died when I was 16, I used to LOVE setting up the Christmas tree. It was an old artificial tree, handmade ornaments, vintage ornaments…every year I would change the tinsel color theme.

Now I can't even access the ornaments. Or that fake tree I grew up with. I loved it so much.

Christmas fucking kills me.
Sometimes I want to go back to the house, ring the doorbell, and shoot myself in the mouth when it opens.
At least I would've returned home. And in some ways claim my home back. Even if I'm dead. They will know who they took it from. Every time they walk thru the front door.

A dark fantasy of mine. Because I can't have Christmas anymore.

Sorry all. I think about fucked up shit like this sometimes. I would never inflict that kind of trauma to anyone IRL.
Wanted to make that clear.

 

[sueoffside]

hate the end of the year bc I never accomplish much, everyone around me is high on Christmas. it's close to the start of a new year and my birthday which means another year with nothing to show for myself I don't want to grow old