When you just want to end yourself but you cant

[moonangel18]

Have you ever felt like wanting to end it all but you just can't because of responsibities and the people around you?

 

[The Divine Comedy]

Yes - exactly my situation. I feel bound to this Earth because I am acutely aware of the pain my death will cause my family. After seeing first hand the pain it causes, I can no longer romanticise my way out of this inescapable fact. It is a perfect hell. When I do eventually do it, I will take no comfort in it.

 

[Idontmatter]

Yeah, that's why I'm still here. However I've ordered now what I need to ctb

 

[Rational man]

You make sense. In my case, i have no dependant s but I hope the few people close to me will understand my reasons, due to painful illhealth. My power of attorney ( appoin ted ) will receive a letter and copy of WILL . My cat and donkey sanctuary will benefit and be cared for.

 

[Dot]

My kids.
But I will never be what I was and they deserve better.

I'm medicating myself to cope until after Christmas and then adios.

I hope I make it that long

Appreciate avoiding xmas.
If personally not able to do in early Nov have 2 wait until after, but not want 2 have 2 go through that time.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Yeah. I do not want to hurt my family. And the one friend I still speak to also. But everyone around me knows I am in a bad state and getting worse. I feel so terrible being like this because it clearly bothers them and they want to help, but only person who can help me hates me....so.....I am stuck....

 

[FuneralCry]

I know others would be sad, but it would be selfish of them to expect me to suffer for decades. We have the right to exit this world at a time of our choosing, we have no obligations to stay alive as we did not exist. It is our life, our decision and nobody else has any say in it.

 

[IanUK]

I'm helping things along until I can hasten the end. I've already given my doctor my wishes as to treatment (none) should I be diagnosed with a terminal illness. I've also got instructions I carry around in case of accident. I've opted out of all the screening programmes they offer as you get older. I won't see a doctor and have no intention of ever seeing one unless I break a bone. I'm now 60 so my risk of developing a terminal Illness are increasing (I hope) and welcome being older as I've hated life for decades. Ultimately I plan to end my life but if nature beats me too it I've made it clear I want no intervention to cure me all I want is to be made comfortable and pain free as I'm a coward .

 

[Dot]

I'm helping things along until I can hasten the end. I've already given my doctor my wishes as to treatment (none) should I be diagnosed with a terminal illness. I've also got instructions I carry around in case of accident. I've opted out of all the screening programmes they offer as you get older. I won't see a doctor and have no intention of ever seeing one unless I break a bone. I'm now 60 so my risk of developing a terminal Illness are increasing (I hope) and welcome being older as I've hated life for decades. Ultimately I plan to end my life but if nature beats me too it I've made it clear I want no intervention to cure me all I want is to be made comfortable and pain free as I'm a coward .

Having survival instinct not cowardly.

 

[moonangel18]

Yeah, that's why I'm still here. However I've ordered now what I need to ctb

I did too. Always planned for it as I live alone but for some reason, I just can't do it even though I wanted to.
I feel stuck too. It sucks.

 

[Idontmatter]

I did too. Always planned for it as I live alone but for some reason, I just can't do it even though I wanted to.
I feel stuck too. It sucks.

I've decided I'm going to do it, just have so much planning and preparation so my husband can pay bills and move on easier after I'm dead

 

[RN12]

i want to live badly but doctor destroyed my health and suffer everyday. so i have no choice. but family and wife will be completely devastated, and they will never have a good life again for sure :( that causes me pain and holds me back but cant live like this so im stuck. help