What's your biggest regret and why?

[EyeBeyond]

What's your biggest regret and why?

 

[Mitsumi]

Not being able to drown myself when I was 10. Lately It just keeps coming back to me

 

[Unattainable666]

Being born.

 

[annointed_towers]

Dating my boyfriend. He ruined my life

 

[LunarLynx]

Mmh, I think my biggest regret was not saying to the girl I love my feelings.

Since I want to CTB, I don't want her to think that I CTBed because she said no. On the other hand, if she say yes I will still CTB so I don't want her to be sad about it.

I try to be the most altruist possible but it's really hard for my mental health I think haha.

And you OP ? What's your biggest regret ?

 

[Sleeper System]

Taking too long to realize the reality of this world.
I would have tried a little harder in life.
Changed the outcomes that led me to be miserable and suicidal.
It would be no eaiser to die back then than it is now.
Or maybe I was always meant to be this way regardless.
I guess regretting being born would be the easier answer.

 

[Zaljko]

Getting married.

Apparently having compassion leaves you open to emotional abuse and manipulation - being single perpetually would have been a far, far better option.

 

[CouldaHvBeenARock]

Waiting this long to end thing

Like damn all I got was an extra large serving of suffering

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

Taking too long to realize the reality of this world.
I would have tried a little harder in life.
Changed the outcomes that led me to be miserable and suicidal.
It would be no eaiser to die back then than it is now.
Or maybe I was always meant to be this way regardless.
I guess regretting being born would be the easier answer.

It may not have made much of a difference. This world is no longer a place where honest hard work gets rewarded. You either have to lie, cheat and steal, or do something stupid and completely useless that today's braindead society worships to get ahead in this life. That is the "reality of this world".

I damn near worked my self to death in my 30s and it got me nowhere. Even if you become something super sucessful like a doctor for example, you're likely going to have a goldigging spouse, suicide-inducing stress from malpractice lawsuits and unruly patients, etc. Then the goverment takes half of your money to sustain the dregs of society.

 

[Sleeper System]

It may not have made much of a difference. This world is no longer a place where honest hard work gets rewarded. You either have to lie, cheat and steal, or do something stupid and completely useless that today's braindead society worships to get ahead in this life. That is the "reality of this world".

I damn bear worked my self to death in my 30s and it got me nowhere. Even if you become something super sucessful like a doctor for example, you're likely going to have a goldigging spouse, suicide-inducing stress from malpractice lawsuits and unruly patients, etc. Then the goverment takes half of your money to sustain the dregs of society.

Knowing what I know now I would have done whatever it would have taken. All of the above. Living honestly isn't as admirable as society would have you believe.
I would have cheated, stolen, betrayed anyone, just to end up in a diffrent space than I am now because it's a worthless existence. I would know the true nature of this reality and would have adapted to it instead of ignorantly not caring and just going through life like a fucking zombie. All these so called bad evil people in the world.... I bet they sleep great at night. More peacefully then an honest hardworking sucidial fuck up anyway.

 

[jbear824]

Not telling my birth unit to not lay her hands on me ever again, much sooner than I did.

Not running away with my sister when she ran away from home. My life could have been so different.

Fuck I have so many. It's tragic.

 

[wanttodie]

Being born. and biggest regret is I still have not ended my life

 

[Suspect_Device]

I did cocaine alot, to the point where my nose altered and I couldn't breath out of my left nostril. I religiously did a calisthenics workout routine for years that slowly fucked up my shoulders and neck. Also I had a cockroach infestation in my apartment that I couldn't eliminate, but years later realized they were coming from the base of a rice cooker that I used constantly. Constant missed opportunities with women when I was a teenager and in my 20's cause the ssri's had me shriveled and numb.

 

[Celerity]

Not killing myself 6-7 years ago when my ideation was at its zenith. Aside from that, I really feel like I have too many to zero in on any one. I suppose I would pick pursuing my original career. It so completely derailed my life that I have not yet recovered and now work a wage-slave job.

 

[Sluggish_Slump]

Ever failing an attempt (I would rather never have attempted or have one attempt that was successful and be done). I wish I was a lot more committed to either living or dying but I can't really go all the way with anything in general.

 

[Aim]

My biggest regret is getting back in touch with my family. Why? Because they are a bunch of low self awareness stupid scum. That so wants to be the heroes of the day, but acts completely in the opposite manner (ignorance is a bliss I guess) without going into to much details.

 

[Raindancer]

I have so many smaller ones, the biggest would be not figuring out what I really wanted until too late.

 

[bleedingbxnes]

allowing my abusive friend to stay in my life until he found someone else. it's my biggest regret right now at least as his constant cruelty impacts my day to day life

 

[UnwillingSavior]

As dumb or not relatable as some others, for me it's my addiction to sex and porn. Since 8 years old it's consumed me after I was exposed to it on the internet. Tbh, afterwards I just I let it happen. First it was naïveté, then I acknowledged it and don't care now.

I think even if I recovered I've damaged my brain chemistry too much to really be truly functional without like meds or something. Idk, I'm too much of a hot mess to have the energy to try and recover anymore so I could find out.

 

[Celerity]

As dumb or not relatable as some others, for me it's my addiction to sex and porn. Since 8 years old it's consumed me after I was exposed to it on the internet. Tbh, afterwards I just I let it happen. First it was naïveté, then I acknowledged it and don't care now.

I think even if I recovered I've damaged my brain chemistry too much to really be truly functional without like meds or something. Idk, I'm too much of a hot mess to have the energy to try and recover anymore so I could find out.

I know it's different for men, but I also regret starting so early (11). Being exposed to sexual content too early definitely fucks up development. I have to wonder if I would have the sexual problems I'm struggling with if I hadn't done that.

 

[SeaBreeze]

Finding it humorous when I got shocked installing high amperage battery backup systems 20+ years ago, to develop epilepsy, forgetting half of my life and what I was just thinking...

 

[Princess_Kitty]

Biggest regret and only is not having the strength to go through with my plan when I had my 2nd attempt like last year. Had the gun ready and everything and was in secluded area but, at last second I couldn't pull the trigger. Now I regret it every time I wake up.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I have several big regrets.

I regret the way I used to treat my younger brother. While our relationship got better once I cut my stepmother out of my life, I'm still scared about if my horrible treatment towards him when I was younger may have or will eventually affect him.

I regret not telling my dad about overhearing my stepmother complaining about guys not wanting to hit on her on the phone. I overheard her saying this when I was probably between grades 1 to 3. I never had the guts to tell him and because of that he stayed with that abusive bitch for years.

I regret the way I behave towards my grandmother. She tends to be sensitive and it's not uncommon for her to mistake my slight frustrations with things for me being angry at her and somehow that ends up worsening my mood and causes the situation to escalate until I make her cry. I never mean to do it and I always try my best not to make it happen, but I always do. I feel like the stress I caused her might be partly responsible for her memory getting worse.

I regret the way I treated others back in elementary school. I was a little jerk back then. Sometimes I wonder if my actions back then ruined those people's lives, too.

I regret being born altogether. I've only been a burden to those around me. I've made the lives of all of my close family members worse. I feel like I wasn't meant to exist. Like my entire existence was a mistake made by the universe and now I'm here reeking havoc on anyone who dare comes close to me.

 

[Boller Bryant]

My biggest regret is, thinking that I'm a special/smart child. My belief that I was smart and would probably demolished any test imaginable and also being special enough for everyone's attention (I know it's very arrogant of me) made me succumb into a believe that I don't need to do anything to succeed in life (how wrong I am).

 

[cold_severance]

knowing about psych meds and therapists since i wasted so many years on this useless shit.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing in the first place of course, as after all only never existing is true perfection. I don't see any value in existing as a conscious being burdened with the ability to suffer, all that existence ever does is create unnecesssary suffering, problems and harm. There is no need for existence which is a reason why it's tragic how humans impose it.

 

[hellispink]

I have many regrets. But my biggest regret is not having committed suicide years ago. I would have saved myself so much pain and misery. I hate myself for not doing it earlier, talking about years back.

 

[baabbaabbaab]

Trusting doctors who destroyed my life...

 

[Pol]

starting anew, and now i'm stuck.
too long to explain.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I didn't keep in touch with three people who did so much for me in life. They were there for me and some gave up so much for me. I struggled at home though and when I could finally get away, I became very self centred and focussed on education and then, my job. So- by then, they were old and needed me and I wasn't there for them as much as I should have been. I was really selfish and the worst part of it is- I could easily be like that again. It's even worse when you don't learn.