Momotoru
Member
- Jul 3, 2023
- 11
When you are on the verge of impulsively cbt'ing, what things ground you and make you rethink? Mine would be my dog.
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Momotoru
Member
- Jul 3, 2023
- 11
alonely
exists by being merely labeled
- Jul 1, 2023
- 470
The only thing that distracts me from thoughts of ctb is physical pleasure. Physical pain would probably still work too, but I haven't self-harmed in a long time. Both are fleeting feelings, unfortunately.
loyalskateboard
Specialist
- May 4, 2023
- 336
My dog, music, video games, movies, drugs, and occasional moments of happiness with family/friends.
WorthlessTrash
Worthless
- Apr 19, 2022
- 2,431
emptyshell
Member
- Jun 30, 2023
- 15
deadliftEnjoyer
Member
- Nov 9, 2022
- 44
Tikialia
I became the person I swore I'd never become
- May 7, 2023
- 65
Social media does the trick. I usually mass consume content on youtube to make the thoughts go away. Helps for a little bit!
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 47,290
In my case I'm always wishing for non-existence and always will do no matter what. Other people may see existence as something desirable but it could never be for me, it's just a process of slowly dying where only suffering is inevitable. But at least I'm usually able to sleep for some of my time here, existing would be much more unbearable if I couldn't sleep at all, as sleeping is the closest thing to not existing.
psp3000
Enlightened
- May 20, 2023
- 1,715
pain, pleasure, nature, the mundane, and having a good sense of humor and never taking anything too seriously while also being aware and observant and realistic
SpaceEngineer
A Friend
- Jun 29, 2023
- 18
Games, my friends, my amazing girlfriend and my chubby little pug Alfred.
Salvation_
"Please, finish my story."
- Nov 25, 2020
- 235
reading about failed attempts (it grounds and makes me rethink, and not act on impulse)
SuicidalOrganism
Experienced
- May 31, 2023
- 222
RasinBoxECT
idk what I'm doing
- Jun 26, 2023
- 13
RedHates
Professional Victim
- Jun 21, 2023
- 132
Stormy Raine
Quietly counting down the days, hours, minutes..
- Apr 7, 2023
- 372
I'm scared I'll go to hell, it's not worth finding out if it's true. I spend everyday praying today will be my last, then I wake up sad and hold back the tears, then I remember, I can't live forever so it's almost over!
Stormy Raine
Quietly counting down the days, hours, minutes..
- Apr 7, 2023
- 372
I'm living in hell now too, I can't imagine living in an eternal hell, it's not worth the risk, it's almost over!
666razorblade
Recovered. Life is good.
- Jul 7, 2023
- 27
My dog, for sure. Whenever I'm away she sits in my bedroom and waits for me to come home, and when I show up, she cries because she's happy to see me. She is the reason I'm here. It's all for her. No matter how bad it gets, I can't make her wait for me to come home forever.
Busridin'26
Hating every minute of being alive.
- Dec 8, 2019
- 1,877
Food, cannabis, music, youtube or like anime or some kinda show. These don't always work for me though. Sometimes I'm just stuck in it.
AloeGarten
magicka
- May 14, 2021
- 142
Drugs, specifically weed. Working out is also a good way to release pent up feelings but that's hard to do during a depression phaseFood and movies
It was my 14 year old black lab which passed away last year. They really are so much better than humans.
I don't owe it to anyone to keep living, is a helpful bit of relief.What keeps me alive?
It used to be sex. But I haven't had an orgasm with my partner in several months now. I rarely even have one by myself anymore.
It used to be food. But now that I'm a diabetic all the food I like just makes me sicker without actually killing me.
It used to be the new friends I have made in my kinky group. But my current partner has made it quite clear that she is extremely jealous of the time and energy that I have been spending with them and not her.
So with no pleasurable things to look forward to and another probable 25 years of continuous suffering, what keeps me from killing myself?
Nothing but fear of punishment for "committing the unforgivable sin" and fear of hell or some other existence infinitely worse than this one.
It's a pretty shitty reason to force yourself to get out of bed and try to function in this entirely fucked up world. I am nothing but a disappointment to everyone, but especially myself.
My mirror isn't broken. I can't hide the truth from myself for long. Every day I have to face the fact that I am a fucking loser with no fucking courage. I can't live and I can't kill myself either.
So here I am, in some kind of limbo non-existence. Hoping and praying for some miracle painless quick death that in all reality doesn't fucking exist anyway.
Hoping and praying that one day, I will either work up the balls to face my fear or waiting for that last thing, the one more thing that will push me past the fear and make me kill myself.
What a pathetic, miserable fucking life!
I wish someone would put me out of my misery or give me that quick and painless release.
