
Dr Iron Arc
Into the Unknown
- Feb 10, 2020
- 21,392
Getting a girlfriend/wife might stop me if there's true love to be found there but the anxiety from the experience could also push me further off the edge.
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I would say time money and health but the biggest factor is being in a place where I feel loved and therefore safe. I feel i have been sad and isolated most of my life even when I was living with family and room mates. This is due to severe lack of love during childhood when most of peoples problems start. Way too much abuses (plural) at childhood ruins your entire life because you immediately develop trust and anxiety issues that stay with you for life. Even if you only were experiencing trauma in your mid life like around 30-35 like say prison or war or a murder or something that trauma destroys the rest of your days because you have been hurt so bad. Because we were hurt at the beginning of our lives we are sad for our entire existance here. It doesn't matter what type of trauma it was it all hurts even in the strongest of people. I'm 40 and my trauma started between 5-13. That type of pain doesn't heal. It can be "forgotten" but that takes an environment with kind loving people to make someone feel "safe" and even then the trauma is likely to come back from time to time. You don't need psycho meds or therapy you need closure if you can get it and love and comfort. Why put a schizophrenic in the same house with his parents? Fucking system is stupid
@GarageKarate07 what you said is so very true. It happened to me the same way too. I was damaged horribly as a child and it just got worse from there throughout my whole life. Now I'm over 50 crippled both emotionally and physically. It's just over. Nothing could ever make the suffering stop.
Me too :(My physical and mental ailments are impossible to cure so therefore there is absolutely nothing that will stop me from catching that there bus.
Very similar for me. Haven't tried ect/keta/psilocybin yet though. But as everything has failed me so far, my hopes disappeared a long time ago.I have severe depression, it is unbearable. I have tried meds, ECT, ketamine, CBT.. I have an appointment to discuss deep brain stimulation (it is a brain operation) in two weeks. I guess if I could make it those two weeks and be approved and if the operation would work I wouldn't have to ctb. But I don't have a lot of hope because everything up to this point has failed me, I just hope I can make it till the appointment.
Same :( You pretty much hit the nail in the coffin. Childhood trauma sticks with you forever. A lot of the experiences I've had (abusive parents that constantly humiliated me), emotionally unavailable parents, missing out on teen love due to my anxiety, and sheltered/isolated childhood, etc. It's made me so far removed from a normal healthy relationship that I'd be incapable of expressing emotions, showing love to another person or being vulnerable. All of that's necessary for pair bonding. If I were to get in a relationship I'd have zero clue how to communicate either. I 100% relate to what you said about trust issues. I have a very hard time trusting people and it'll probably prevent me from ever finding true love or friendshipI would say time money and health but the biggest factor is being in a place where I feel loved and therefore safe. I feel i have been sad and isolated most of my life even when I was living with family and room mates. This is due to severe lack of love during childhood when most of peoples problems start. Way too much abuses (plural) at childhood ruins your entire life because you immediately develop trust and anxiety issues that stay with you for life. Even if you only were experiencing trauma in your mid life like around 30-35 like say prison or war or a murder or something that trauma destroys the rest of your days because you have been hurt so bad. Because we were hurt at the beginning of our lives we are sad for our entire existance here. It doesn't matter what type of trauma it was it all hurts even in the strongest of people. I'm 40 and my trauma started between 5-13. That type of pain doesn't heal. It can be "forgotten" but that takes an environment with kind loving people to make someone feel "safe" and even then the trauma is likely to come back from time to time. You don't need psycho meds or therapy you need closure if you can get it and love and comfort. Why put a schizophrenic in the same house with his parents? Fucking system is stupid.