I don't know if it's real, unfortunately. I've spent a lot of time contemplating it.
I think it probably is not, but it's hard to say.
According to Buddhism suicide accrues negative karma which influences the next rebirth. However, there are also a large number of other karmic influences that impacts one's next rebirth. Suicide is but one proportion of many.
So, I would say the important question is: what are you doing now to cultivate peace, wisdom, kindness, etc.?
If one engages in right view + right actions, the impact of suicide will likely be less than if one commits suicide after engaging in cruelty, for example.
I would encourage us all to find a sense of peace, loving kindness, and equanimity during these times. If one wishes for resources on Buddhist practice or wants to talk more about it, you are welcome to message me
Wishing all beings peace in living or dying