What do your parents say when they find out you tried ctb

[Ruru-chan2]

I know that my mother is crying rn, and it breaks my heart

I always feel like a burden to others.

 

[krnaaTh]

They told me to not be egoist and think about others and how it will affect them. I feel bad for my parents, it is clear obvious for all my family that the problems at home always start with me

 

[pulleditnearlyoff]

My mom told me that there's no way to stop a suicidal person. In other words….just go ahead

 

[timetodie24]

why did you do it, why didn't you talk to us, why didn't you think of impact on family, it'd ruin our lives, you clearly don't love us , other guilt trips etc.

 

[mellie5]

I think she meant "people will find a way". I am sorry you feel bad, but, with all due respect, unless your parents are not board-certified psychiatrists, they don't know how to deal with suicidal people, the same way they don't know how to treat tuberculosis. Being acutely suicidal *is* a medical emergency and ideally you should call an ambulance. At the hospital you might stay a night, calm down, have breakfast and go home. "Locking up people with ctb ideas" is more a myth actually, it's much rarer than you think. Best of luck.

 

[willitpass]

I think she meant "people will find a way". I am sorry you feel bad, but, with all due respect, unless your parents are not board-certified psychiatrists, they don't know how to deal with suicidal people, the same way they don't know how to treat tuberculosis. Being acutely suicidal *is* a medical emergency and ideally you should call an ambulance. At the hospital you might stay a night, calm down, have breakfast and go home. "Locking up people with ctb ideas" is more a myth actually, it's much rarer than you think. Best of luck.

I'm not sure if you've ever been to the hospital for suicidal thoughts, but my experience has never been a depressed Bed and Breakfast. They can and often do admit you, if you try to refuse admission, they'll section you for a minimum of 72 hours. Everyone's experience is different of course, but mine and MANY others have been severely, severely abused and traumatized by the mental health care system. I've heard from people who have been to both jail and psych hospitals that they were treated better in jail. I would rather do just about anything than ever step foot in one of those places again. That's unfortunately one of the reasons I personally believe this site exists, because the mental health care system so often fails to help us, and more often than not causes more harm than good.

 

[Franken_1517]

My mom slapped me and told me a bad person. I know she was worried about me and concerned. But I can't get her words out of my mind.

 

[mellie5]

I'm not sure if you've ever been to the hospital for suicidal thoughts, but my experience has never been a depressed Bed and Breakfast. They can and often do admit you, if you try to refuse admission, they'll section you for a minimum of 72 hours. Everyone's experience is different of course, but mine and MANY others have been severely, severely abused and traumatized by the mental health care system. I've heard from people who have been to both jail and psych hospitals that they were treated better in jail. I would rather do just about anything than ever step foot in one of those places again. That's unfortunately one of the reasons I personally believe this site exists, because the mental health care system so often fails to help us, and more often than not causes more harm than good.

yes, I remember you told me once about your bad experiences. I remember even people getting sent home on the same day, after a chat (but not for actual attempts, more like messaging the gf who just broke up "then I'll kill myself" and the gf calling the police). And ik many psych hospitals and none were like Someome Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest.

The ones I saw were nice places and people tried to stay longer bcs they got massages and all kinds of stuff. Personally I never saw a place as bad as those you say but I am not doubting you.

An actual real suicide attempt would stay for sure until the next day (espc bcs toxicology, substance levels, or surgery). But I remember at least one just last year leaving the next morning.

Not all psychiatric hospitals are how you describe those you have seen. Some have dedicated doctors who stay well beyond their work-time and have unpaid chats with the patients. And as I said, those I have seen were so comfortable patients wanted to stay longer than necessary.

But even with an actual suicide attempt, if the pat. the next day shows that it was a mistake, an error in judgement and other positive signs, he leaves.

Sure, a site like this may exist because of bad hospitals and bad doctors but those who are satisfied will not show up here and write everything's fine, the hospital was great and my doctor super. I can assure you that there are thousands that are happy with their treatment.

 

[keg-ireland]

I'm not sure if you've ever been to the hospital for suicidal thoughts, but my experience has never been a depressed Bed and Breakfast. They can and often do admit you, if you try to refuse admission, they'll section you for a minimum of 72 hours. Everyone's experience is different of course, but mine and MANY others have been severely, severely abused and traumatized by the mental health care system. I've heard from people who have been to both jail and psych hospitals that they were treated better in jail. I would rather do just about anything than ever step foot in one of those places again. That's unfortunately one of the reasons I personally believe this site exists, because the mental health care system so often fails to help us, and more often than not causes more harm than good.

100% agreed. My week in the psychiatric unit caused so much trauma. It was like a prison. I am much worse off having went in there. Never ever will I go near it again. My Dr told me as well that those places are not therapeutic but more to stop you from committing suicide.

 

[Tesha]

20 odd years ago, when I first tried…. My father told me that he had recently been under investigation for lung cancer, so how could I be so selfish. He hadn't been under investigation. He lied to get me to feel bad and get him the attention. Arsehole.

 

[BARIZON]

My mom told me that there's no way to stop a suicidal person. In other words….just go ahead

well, that's exactly what you gonna hear on this forum too, most of the times.

 

[jarik]

they told me not to think only of myself but of those around me and who are beside me. not knowing that this is bad for me, to continue living just for people? And you? Don't you think about your mental and physical health?

 

[BARIZON]

they told me not to think only of myself but of those around me and who are beside me. not knowing that this is bad for me, to continue living just for people? And you? Don't you think about your mental and physical health?

Your reply kind of reminds me of this farewell letter from one of our members:

Workshop Your Suicide Note

As I write my suicide note, I thought it might be useful to have a sort of "workshopping" thread similar to what occurs in literary circles. Post your suicide note and offer comments on the notes others have posted. Some resources to help you get started on writing your suicide note...

sanctioned-suicide.net

It's so well written, i'm gonna use parts of it myself, don't think i can exaplain it any better. This opening:

"Before I say anything else , pease believe that I did not seek to cause anyone pain... Only to ease my own. I feel great grief and guilt that I must leave you all this way, and many times before my guilt has caused me not to act on my desire to end my life. However, guilt is not enough to live on. I cannot live only to avoid hurting others."

So many things condensed in one sentence.

 

[jarik]

Your reply kind of reminds me of this farewell letter from one of our members:

Workshop Your Suicide Note

As I write my suicide note, I thought it might be useful to have a sort of "workshopping" thread similar to what occurs in literary circles. Post your suicide note and offer comments on the notes others have posted. Some resources to help you get started on writing your suicide note...

sanctioned-suicide.net

It's so well written, i'm gonna use parts of it myself, don't think i can exaplain it any better. This opening:

"Before I say anything else , pease believe that I did not seek to cause anyone pain... Only to ease my own. I feel great grief and guilt that I must leave you all this way, and many times before my guilt has caused me not to act on my desire to end my life. However, guilt is not enough to live on. I cannot live only to avoid hurting others."

So many things condensed in one sentence.

A really touching letter, no doubt I will take an example from this

 

[sadbones]

My mom said don't tell your brother about this it'll upset him. I know who the favorite is lol

 

[permanently tired]

My mother told me not to say those things lmao she's such a prick

 

[Coconut blue]

my mom said I imagined trying to ctb bc I'm delusional or my mind is playing tricks on me with false memory, or I just made up the experience for attention lmao

 

[Alltheywanted]

My mother cried and said things like, "How could you do this to us," and my father remained calm until the next day when I saw him cry for the first time in my life.

 

[mellie5]

again, parents are not trained for this and too emotionally involved. While the psychiatrist will remain calm and show almost no reaction, if your parents did so, it would be extremely weird.

Ideally, a psychiatrist should explain to them how to behave. This is called psychoeducation and relatives of people with mental problems attend it for a few times.

Some have an impression that psychiatric treatment involved locking up people in a damp cage. It's not. It's a normal treatment with some specific things, like addiction, which is not just meds.

It's really not automatic that CTB ideas = locked up and tied up, there are degrees of CTB ideas which range from "my life is awful" to actively trying to grab anything, even a pen, to stab oneself, and then you need a bunch of nurses to actually physically hold the person (but being held is awful so they get medicine that works in a few seconds).

Even actual attempts are graded depending on certain factors.

FYI what happens in psych care sort of ranges like this:

1. appointments to chat and perhaps med (ideally one person for chatting and one for prescribing)

2. day-clinic: you go in the morning and leave after lunch

3. inpatient: you sleep in the hospital but usually get "test days" which means you can go home on the weekends to see how you feel about it

4. locked ward. You sleep in the hospital but depending on the situation you can go out alone for a few hours or (more restricted) with another patient or (even more restricted) with a nurse.

5. locked ward with regular checking. A nurse will come every (30 mins. to 4 hours depending on what the doctor decided and make sure you are ok). Gives a lot of work to the nurses, who sometimes are 2 in a ward of 30 pats.

6. constant surveillance: a nurse sits next to you. This is already rare because because then a nurse is "locked" onto you and hospitals don't have an infinite amount of nurses for day and night.

6. tied up: this is the most extreme, because actually even if the doctors are cold-blooded monsters as some think, people can vomit and have all sorts of problems which need immediate intervention bcs they can't move and doctors don't want to be called every 5 minutes. This happens mainly to people who have taken weird drugs and come with 6 policemen. Usually by the time the police brought them they calmed down and you can just have a normal conversation and ask "can I be sure you will behave here?". Then they don't get tied up. But some at night try to hit other patients or do bad things. Some actually ask to be tied up for a few hours.