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K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
I think a lot of us hate ourselves or at least don't love ourselves. I certainly know that I utterly despise myself with every fibre of my being. But I basically wanted to ask everyone... what is something (or multiple things) that you actually like about yourself?

Please respect the spirit of this post and don't reply here with negative things about yourself. I understand the temptation, but this is the recovery section and I'm trying to get us to look at our positive side or sides a little bit, even with how hard that can be.

I think for me maybe there's six things.
1. I'm smart. I'm insecure about this sometimes (because I'm insecure about everything) but when I really try to be objective, I know that's the case. And I appreciate my intelligence. Even if it can also cause trouble.
2. I think I can be pretty funny sometimes. Not always, but sometimes. And I love making people laugh.
3. I'm analytical. Arguably similar to smart, but not the same. It's more of a mindset thing. It's about the WAY that I think about stuff. I tend to analyze everything down to the details and methodically.
4. I try my best to be fair. I feel like a lot of the time people will do things like take sides, rally against the out-group, etc. I like to think I'm pretty good at resisting those urges. But I can't say I'm perfect. Still I like to think I'm good at it.
5. I'm determined. I mean, I spent about a decade trying to finish college despite my mental health issues. Once I set a goal I will definitely do almost anything to reach it and will fight through almost any barriers without giving up.
6. I love deeply. When I love someone, I love them completely and utterly and would do almost anything for them. This has its downsides but in the final conclusion I'd say this is a trait I value in myself.
 
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destinationlosangel

destinationlosangel

Student
Feb 16, 2024
134
Yeah this is actually good, looking at things from this perspective. Focussing on the positives.

I dont know if its cuz a lot of ppl here are a mix of above average IQ, neurodivergent, having depression, autism etc. The list that you made for urself - I think that I check all those boxes. Its almost like are we the same person?

To add onto that, I would say I'm conscientious which i always thought was a good quality. Giving importance to ppl's feelings and such. but i think thats a quality that's sort of a disadvantage in the kinda world we live in so i dunno.
 
K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
Yeah this is actually good, looking at things from this perspective. Focussing on the positives.

I dont know if its cuz a lot of ppl here are a mix of above average IQ, neurodivergent, having depression, autism etc. The list that you made for urself - I think that I check all those boxes. Its almost like are we the same person?

To add onto that, I would say I'm conscientious which i always thought was a good quality. Giving importance to ppl's feelings and such. but i think thats a quality that's sort of a disadvantage in the kinda world we live in so i dunno.
I think at the end of the day conscientiousness is both good and bad. It's good when you find the right people. The kinds of people who will be considerate of you too. But it's bad when you find people who'll just exploit it. It's that way with a lot of things, I think. A lot of things can be situationally great or bad. I guess you just need to find the people you vibe with in that way. But I think it's an admirable trait and I wish more people had it. =)
I would say I'm quite compassionate or at least, I'm never cruel. The well-being of people around me is extremely important to me and I put taking care of people in pain above pretty much everything else.
I think that's a very good trait. And underappreciated in the world.
 
ColorlessTrees

ColorlessTrees

Stuck
Jan 4, 2022
204
I think this is a wonderful thread. The common sentiment of self hatred seems to permeate the forum, but it's worth considering that everyone has at least one good trait—even one's flaws can be beneficial to certain contexts. I'm no stranger to muddied self perception; and though I have been conditioned to feel my worth hinges on my contributions to society, I still have plenty to offer.

1. I'm a bleeding heart softie; I have the genuine ability to empathize. (and in the same vein as stated above, one's good qualities can also be flaws)
2. I strive to hold balanced perspectives with a healthy dose of nuance—or a grain of salt if someone manages to poke holes in my reasoning. And despite my strong opinions and value system, I'm able to agree to disagree; yes, in fact, we can even still be friends.
3. I'm extremely loyal in love and friendship (though it's rare that I find connections worth devoting myself to.)
4. Intellectually and emotionally, I would consider myself somewhat mature. The very sentence sounds arrogant, and there's nothing I hate more, but in clearer terms, I know when to walk away—from the pettiest of conflicts to dearly-held connections gone sour.
5. I am unhinged. In other words, I'm a prime case of monkey-brain entertainment. Even better, I'm able to flip between degeneracy and logical thought processes at will.

Bonus: I've been told I'm well spoken by countless people, but I'm still on the fence about that, myself. I am certainly capable of eloquence, but it's highly dependent on the day.
 
Arachno

Arachno

oh no :(
Apr 10, 2023
145
I'm really bad at saying good things about myself but here goes: I never argue with anyone, I choose my words carefully, I have a vivid imagination and I'm generally a huge softie lol. I also have a hyperfixation on firearms, so I really like learning about them and stuff. But I'm not really sure if these can considered good traits :')
 
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K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
I'm really bad at saying good things about myself but here goes: I never argue with anyone, I choose my words carefully, I have a vivid imagination and I'm generally a huge softie lol. I also have a hyperfixation on firearms, so I really like learning about them and stuff. But I'm not really sure if these can considered good traits :')
I definitely think a lot of those are good traits. People with a vivid imagination create the most incredible things and enrich the world. Being a softie I think is also good. It can be hard, but I think the world would be better if more people were more empathetic. And liking to learn is I think one of the single best qualities someone can have. Because curiosity and learning are not only the cause of so many incredible inventions, but they invite understanding. And people understanding themselves is core to improving themselves and people understanding each other is core to improving the world and making it the best world it can possibly be.
 
HereTomorrow

HereTomorrow

eternally atoning
Feb 1, 2024
134
It's a half weakness but I'm extremely empathetic. I may be suicidial but I absolutely care about my family, friends, or anyone who needs an ear. I like understanding people's struggles even if I can't help.

Also, I like how I can just cook on the fly. Throw a bunch of random food and I can probably come up with something half decent. Being health conscious, being able to make my own meals makes me feel more confident.
 
K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
It's a half weakness but I'm extremely empathetic. I may be suicidial but I absolutely care about my family, friends, or anyone who needs an ear. I like understanding people's struggles even if I can't help.

Also, I like how I can just cook on the fly. Throw a bunch of random food and I can probably come up with something half decent. Being health conscious, being able to make my own meals makes me feel more confident.
I'm also very empathetic. I understand what you mean by calling it half a weakness. I honestly would never say this to myself because I'm too self-critical, but I do think it's good that people are empathetic. The world would be so much better if everyone was.

And the cooking thing is very impressive. =)
 
lemonbunny

lemonbunny

daydreaming the pain away ☆.。.:*・°
Sep 9, 2023
132
honestly props to you for grinding through college. im struggling to do the same thing myself :(

one sort of~ positive thing i can think of is that i'm pretty... forgiving? whereas other people might lose their temper or hold a grudge, i kind of try to be the bigger person.
guess it makes me a pushover in some sense, but i like to think that i don't contribute to negativity as much as i tolerate it
 
K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
honestly props to you for grinding through college. im struggling to do the same thing myself :(

one sort of~ positive thing i can think of is that i'm pretty... forgiving? whereas other people might lose their temper or hold a grudge, i kind of try to be the bigger person.
guess it makes me a pushover in some sense, but i like to think that i don't contribute to negativity as much as i tolerate it
Getting through college is really difficult. It's okay that you're struggling with it. But the fact that you're still trying despite struggling is a lot in itelf.

That's definitely sometimes some people would take advantage of, but that's their fault, not yours. Recieving forgiveness is a powerful thing so it's definitely something important and good to have. And certainly not something everyone can do, I know I struggle with that.
 
LoiteringClouds

LoiteringClouds

Tempus fugit
Feb 7, 2023
3,440
what is something (or multiple things) that you actually like about yourself?
Wow this is a thread designed for me!
Thank you @KafkaF you set me free -
It's time to stop to be cynical -
Here I'm going to wax lyrical! [1]

I have so high tolerance for shame -
I've been a person people defame.
So, with the forsaken I suffered -
True compassion was what I offered. [2]

I can't be grateful enough to those,
Who helped me when problems arose.
Here, I am no longer dead inside -
Glory to our Sanctioned Suicide!

(If I'm correct each line has 9 syllables. I used this syllable counter.)

Notes:
[1] Sorry, there's no meds or treatment for "pathological rhymer," but please let me know if it's inappropriate - I'm ready to correct my mistakes.
[2] This symptom is called "grandiosity" which is typical for people with bipolar disorder - I know how hard offering true compassion is. I've diagnosed with bipolar II and I suspect doctors had thought so because of my grandiosity.
 
wondering&wandering

wondering&wandering

My precious moon! Don't go, please.
Jan 12, 2024
122
Really good thread here. Props to making it!

I think I'm good at encouraging people. Sometimes I wonder if I do it for selfish reasons like to boost my self-esteem. But at the end of the day, if I made a positive impact on someone's life, it warms my heart to see them brighten up!
 
sserafim

sserafim

they say it’s darkest of all before the dawn
Sep 13, 2023
6,599
I like how I'm logical and analytical. I also like my creativity, curiosity, uniqueness, intelligence, perspective on the world, individuality, authenticity, etc
 
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K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
Really good thread here. Props to making it!

I think I'm good at encouraging people. Sometimes I wonder if I do it for selfish reasons like to boost my self-esteem. But at the end of the day, if I made a positive impact on someone's life, it warms my heart to see them brighten up!
Thank you. =)

I think ultimately all motivation is selfish. We want to make other people feel good because it makes us feel good. That's what empathy is, really. So I agree, at the end of the day, it's the fact that you made a positive difference that counts.
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
18,642
My height (6 ft) and my name (lol, nice try).

I genuinely can't find anything else I like about myself.
 
K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
My height (6 ft) and my name (lol, nice try).

I genuinely can't find anything else I like about myself.
Hey, height is a good asset. Usually considered desireable. Although I do believe chances are there's more positive though. I get it though, it's hard. For me it was very hard too to find those 6 things and even harder to believe them. I had to really take a step back from how I feel about myself and try to consider myself more fully.
 
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K

KafkaF

Taking a break from the website.
Nov 18, 2023
451
Nothing, i hate everything about me.
"Please respect the spirit of this post and don't reply here with negative things about yourself. I understand the temptation, but this is the recovery section and I'm trying to get us to look at our positive side or sides a little bit, even with how hard that can be."
 
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VentingMachine4224

VentingMachine4224

Diebolic Lurker
Dec 22, 2023
1,740
I am a Blood Donor and can donate blood! I guess that is something not a lot of folks can be able to do these days but I could be wrong about that.
 

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