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Emily_Numb

Emily_Numb

Wizard
Jan 14, 2020
654
Drink, which I'm trying not to. Was 3 years sober from alcohol until October and started drinking again. Then quit again New Year and relapsed twice already. I really don't want to drink because ultimately it's not good for me but sometimes it the only way I can feel anything.

Failing that, cutting. Again, this year I started that again after nearly 3 1/2 years, mostly on my arms with old fashioned razor blades and scratching myself until I bleed. I'm not even sure what makes me do it.

If neither of those things I will try and take any sort of sleeping tablets, preferably benzos, so I can tranquillise myself. If not, I'll take codeine just to get some sort of buzz and motivation. I'm in the UK so you can get that over the counter.

And last but not least, a binge-purge episode. I use most of the unhealthy coping mechanisms under the sun.
 
Last edited:
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
7,012
It depends, there are many factors that come into play. If I am alone and by myself, then I sometimes ruminate and stew in my own thoughts and what not. Other times, I listen to certain music and play online games/video games.
 
Thereisnothing

Thereisnothing

Enlightened
Jan 4, 2020
1,604
Try and pick myself up, do physical things.............then go down again.
 

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