What are your unique reasons to ctb?

[Life sucks]

Everyone has different and multiple reasons to ctb but some reasons are unique or specific.

I have many reasons. For example, I think time is the problem and its impossible to freeze time so its better to ctb. I keep losing everything and eventually losing myself with time.

 

[ScorchedLifePolicy]

Unknown illness can't keep going to the doctor with Covid floating around, I risk passing it to family. SN is running late in the mail just my luck.

 

[walktothewater]

My evil family have made my life unliveable.

 

[elfgyoza]

I've never seen it mentioned on SS, but misophonia is one of my main reasons so I guess that'd be kinda 'unique'

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

I've never seen it mentioned on SS, but misophonia is one of my main reasons so I guess that'd be kinda 'unique'

If you don't mind me asking what is misophonia

 

[Huntfish34]

I was wondering the same thing . ,?. Not familiar with it

 

[peacechoice]

I have many many reasons to CTB, many weird reasons

1. I do not conform to societies standards of living. I am supposed to get married and have kids, but I do not want that. Or work for the rest of my miserable life, but I also do not want that.
2. Working just leads me to other terrible reasons. Why contribute to this capitalistic society my whole life and keep on screwing my self until I die. I suck. Work yourself to your bone and then kill yourself , really?
3. If I can't work because I get sick then how am I supposed to contribute to society with not paycheck and no one to support me? I'll have no husband or money, might as well just kill my self.
4. Leads me to another thing, if I can't have independence, as in financially for myself, then I don't want anyone to pull me out. I want to be able to get myself ahead and if I can't then I'll just kill myself.
5. I will be damned if I let a man control me because I am financially dependent on him. No. I will kill myself.

 

[elfgyoza]

If you don't mind me asking what is misophonia

Sorry probably should've summarised. Something most people experience to some degree, normally likened to hearing nails on a chalkboard. Certain repetitive 'trigger' sounds cause intense emotional distress, disgust, and anger, leading to a fight of flight response
As a teen I couldn't leave my room without blasting music through earphones to avoid any noise associated with eating and breathing. I can't spend too much time with anyone and I know they can't control the sound as well, they're normal sounds, which only makes me feel guilty for being angry (even though I can't control it)

 

[OopsIdidntwanttodie]

to end it before it gets worse

 

[SpinTop555]

Just to end the suffering once and for all.

 

[Shahanshah]

I am my problem. I want to get rid of myself.

 

[Sensei]

My life has slowly and gradually been ruined by mental illness. It's been a somewhat subtle process and I didn't realize what was happening until it was too late.

 

[SpinTop555]

My life has slowly and gradually been ruined by mental illness. It's been a somewhat subtle process and I didn't realize what was happening until it was too late.

Same here, except it wasn't subtle. I truly relate.

I am my problem. I want to get rid of myself.

I feel this viscerally.

 

[TessB]

Recently I realised my reasons to ctb are about saying fuck you to certain family members of mine for how they treated me.

 

[KleinerWolf]

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

Sorry probably should've summarised. Something most people experience to some degree, normally likened to hearing nails on a chalkboard. Certain repetitive 'trigger' sounds cause intense emotional distress, disgust, and anger, leading to a fight of flight response
As a teen I couldn't leave my room without blasting music through earphones to avoid any noise associated with eating and breathing. I can't spend too much time with anyone and I know they can't control the sound as well, they're normal sounds, which only makes me feel guilty for being angry (even though I can't control it)

Wow that must be horrible

 

[rabbithole]

Disability, social anxiety, bdd, depression. lost bladder and sexual function after a lumbar puncture, now have arachnoiditis. extremely painful neurological condition.

 

[Ghostly]

Drug addiction, sexual abuse, loneliness, abuse in general from previous friends, being left all the time, no friends anymore, someone close to me dying, anorexia, possibly OCD

 

[Frauw]

The way this world works is very boring, and flesh is very limiting.

 

[DarkAngel]

Chronic illness that is worsening. I want to leave while I still have a little dignity left.

 

[serah]

I don't have a unique reason, I just hate myself.

 

[Marchioness]

Childhood abuse and then much later an ex ruined me financially, I was young, naive and too trusting.

 

[Deformationalplagio]

Everyone has different and multiple reasons to ctb but some reasons are unique or specific.

I have many reasons. For example, I think time is the problem and its impossible to freeze time so its better to ctb. I keep losing everything and eventually losing myself with time.

A deformity of the face and skull. Im a guy who is kind of metrosexual in mind so it clashes with how i look. There are some people who can live with severe deformitys but not me. Its just not how i was build on the inside. If there is a next life ( not that i believe) i want to be a pretty girl instead. I think i would deserve that after this one

 

[EnnuiCat]

I hate almost everything about life. The only thing I enjoy doing is sleeping. So might as well sleep forever.

 

[esann7]

If you don't mind me asking what is misophonia

"
A strong reaction to specific sounds.
Misophonia may cause a reaction to sounds such as dripping water, chewing, snapping gum, or repetitive noises, such as pencil tapping." ......People with misophonia can become irritated, enraged, or even panicked when they hear their trigger sounds.

to end it before it gets worseYED

 

[filthyrottendirty]

I'm retarded.

 

[StringPuppet]

Well it's one of a few reasons, but my teeth are really bad and I'm an idiot so I'll never earn enough money to get them fixed.

 

[Midgardsorm]

I've never seen it mentioned on SS, but misophonia is one of my main reasons so I guess that'd be kinda 'unique'

My misophonia led to OCD, which is the main reason that causes my life to be miserable.
Ocd evolved from sounds, to "contamination" ocd ( it's mainly a strong discomfort towards grease or anything related to it)

I hate to blame others for my problems, but I cannot deny that my family, hoping that I would 'habituate' to the sounds, made it much worse, purposely making those sounds whenever I was around. It didn't helped, only made more anxious.

Watch out for people that believes they have a psychology degree and try to 'help you' by doing that.
The so-called Exposure Therapy is much more complex, and even then it's not guaranteed that it will help.

 

[FreeAngel]

My reason is that I want to be with my best friend in heaven

 

[GarageKarate07]

Everyone has different and multiple reasons to ctb but some reasons are unique or specific.

I have many reasons. For example, I think time is the problem and its impossible to freeze time so its better to ctb. I keep losing everything and eventually losing myself with time.

I had a bad childhood with abuse and being bullied and therefore "unprotected" by my parents. This was at school and then at home for many years. It killed me before I had a chance. Drove me to drugs and smoking. I still smoke today as it's my only true friend. Over the years several injuries and illnesses have been developed. Bad dental hygiene from being so anxious has left me with early dentures and constant infections. I havs 2 head injuries. Between those things I have a brain fog that has been debilitating. That plus unsettling emotions and constant negative thoughts. Plus the sadness in this world gives me pain so very very deep every time I see anyone or anything suffer. This is just a cocktail for destruction. I feel strong that I have lasted this long but my illnesses are killing me on several levels. It's time to go home I fear.