- Oct 28, 2021
A torturous neurological disease that makes life absolutely unbearable. Unrelenting exhaustion, going broke, no family, abusive unstable living environment, severe depression, adhd, too many others to list.
To be honest I'm not really sure. I guess I can relate to you In not fitting in with anyone. I csn5 show anyone my full true self and I don't like my full true self either. I'm not a failure though I've actually always been a kind of golden child but still I feel secluded by everyone even though I have friends. I also can't understand the point of life. Like is there any meaning. I don't get itWhy do you want to ctb? My main reason is being a failure and disappointment, and not having a career, job or income. I wish I could be successful, I see everyone around me advancing in life and I feel more like a failure who hasn’t made something out of themself. I’m basically a shut-in at this point, and I’ve failed to launch successfully into adulthood.
Another reason is me just not fitting into society. I’m neurodivergent (ADHD as well as other things) and I’ll never belong or find my place in society. Therefore I want to ctb to escape it. I don’t want to have to participate in society. I also don’t want to have to work for a living for the rest of my life, I would rather die. I hate the idea of being a slave to capitalism, forced to work for 40 years before I eventually die. I don’t think this kind of existence is meaningful or fulfilling.