What are your dead dreams?

[zeevo]

What are some goals or wishes that you gave up on? It could be something realistic (for some people) that you don't see in your future like owning a home or being happy with someone, or something that seems completely unattainable, like a childhood dream that you had to shed as you grew older.

As a really young kid, I had a pretty serious fascination with space, I was definitely influenced by sci fi. Like many kids at that age, being an astronaut sounded like a dream job. As I got a little older, I realized how few people get that opportunity and tried to set my sights on what I thought were more attainable goals. I just wanted to discover or invent something significant or useful.
As I spent time in school I found myself genuinely interested in my science classes despite not consistently doing well in them. I was decent with comp sci and even got to take a robotics class. I struggled in math which greatly hindered me in physics and chemistry, and decreased my confidence in computer related studies. Before my senior year of high school I had already accepted that I probably wouldn't ever succeed in a field I cared about.

 

[mortuarymary]

Being a pathologist was my dream. Could have done but picked wrong subject, then wrong degree amd now I'm here. But I did become an APT anatomical pathologist assistant.

 

[Unhumanly.]

Painting jobs, art related jobs

 

[hikikomorizombie]

getting a lil bungalow out in The Green somewhere w some animals, & living the rest of my days there, away from ppl :') doesn't seem so unattainable, but i'm just not capable of being the functioning member of society i need to be to make that happen.

 

[leavingthesoultrap]

Living off-grid. (Realised that's impossible long time ago)
Making living as an artist.
Being happily married. (I don't even want a serious relationship anymore)

Painting jobs, art related jobs

I don't think those even exist

 

[TheSpookyNameGuy]

I wanted to be a programmer, video game developer.

I'm pretty knowledgeable in terms of computers, ive dabbled in many areas but i just couldn't do it.

The thought of sitting behind a computer all day for work sounds like fucking misery to me, i enjoy it for leisure or education but that's it.

I preferred doing digital art more, i made alot of pixelart & tilesets for some mods and small indies back when i had a wacom tablet in my teens.

Now i do physical labour jobs and it's much better

 

[sserafim]

My parents wanted me to be a doctor, but I was always more of the creative type. I like music and singing, so I used to think about being a singer, but I wouldn't want to be famous, perform in front of people (due to stage fright and the fact that I just don't like people), or have my face and image everywhere. I would hate to be well-known. Instead, I enjoy being incognito.

 

[cupcakesandmilk]

I wanted to become an athlete, make my country proud, and its people happy...

And look at me now, just mindlessly chasing others so that I don't end up on the streets in a country that I've now grown to hate, including its people. It's almost funny, lol.

 

[lemonbunny]

getting a phd or master's. there is no way i can keep up with school ever again

 

[zeevo]

I wanted to be a programmer, video game developer.

I'm pretty knowledgeable in terms of computers, ive dabbled in many areas but i just couldn't do it.

The thought of sitting behind a computer all day for work sounds like fucking misery to me, i enjoy it for leisure or education but that's it.

I preferred doing digital art more, i made alot of pixelart & tilesets for some mods and small indies back when i had a wacom tablet in my teens.

Now i do physical labour jobs and it's much better

Fuck dude as a kid I didn't wanna live my life in a cubicle either, and game dev stuff is how I started getting into computers too. I remember trying to teach myself blender and one year I got to use Maya in school, holy shit that program does so much of the work for you.

I wanted to become an athlete, make my country proud, and its people happy...

And look at me now, just mindlessly chasing others so that I don't end up on the streets in a country that I've now grown to hate, including its people. It's almost funny, lol.

Former athlete here too, constantly changed sports and never really gained muscle. I don't think sports are pointless but I hate how much of my life they consumed without giving me any satisfaction.

It's also a bit of a bummer seeing that supporting one's self through art or other forms of expression and living simply and separate from society is seemingly unattainable for many.

 

[sserafim]

getting a phd or master's. there is no way i can keep up with school ever again

Same

 

[Leavesfromthevine]

The main dream I had that I gave up on was to be a pilot. I just can't justify the cost of school (usually at least $100k)

Now I have a backup plan if I fail ctb to just work temporary jobs so I can travel a lot more. I've gave up on plenty of dreams already so very little has significance to me.

 

[Meteora]

No more thinking, no more pain, oblivion, eternal peace

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Like I mentioned elsewhere, I used to want to be a cartoonist or animator growing up. This dream died two years into my animation degree when I realized that I actually really suck at drawing and don't have the patience to get better.

I briefly also had dreams of being a writer but I just don't think I have anything too interesting to say.

I also dreamed of becoming a better dad than my own but it looks like it would be better for the world if I just didn't become one at all.

 

[StarlightDreamer]

I had dreams of being a published writer, and a brilliant web developer. Then schizophrenia destroyed that dream.

People focus on the hallucinations and delusions - "Positive" symptoms - because we have effective treatments for them. What they don't tell you is that it comes with a boatload of cognitive issues that leave you a shell of yourself. Everything becomes so much harder to learn, you forget great swathes of your past (including skills), and you'll more than likely end up on disability.

This is bad news for a writer, whose craft relies on contemplation and past wisdom. As it is for the programmer, who needs mental acuity and broad knowledge. There's still a chance I'll get there, but it'll likely be years-delayed.

 

[Act Two]

love.

 

[letsgetittogo]

I'm currently heavily leveraged, education- wise, into aviation. My major is in engineering and I'm currently an aircraft solder technician, all because since I was a kid, I wanted to be a pilot. I always thought it'd be really nice to see the world and the clouds from the cockpit of an aircraft :) I was planning on either commissioning as a pilot in the military, or simply getting my flight hours and becoming a commercial pilot after I finished my degree, but I'm not sure if those dreams will ever come to fruition.

Very long term, my mom used to take my sister and I sailing when we were kids. Later on, when she got cancer, she had to sell the sailboat so we could pay for treatment. The name of the ship was the "Voyager" she was a 44 foot sloop. I always imagined myself saving money and investing my aviation earnings into real estate so that later on I could buy a Ketch, call it the "Divine Intervention" and take 2-4 years to circumnavigate the world.

A lot of my faith in life has died since then. I'm unbearably lonely, and it truly makes my skin crawl. I want friends, I want to meet someone and fall in love; and since my parents are dead, I've only grown more and more isolated, and the feelings of loneliness have grown so strong that I can't manage them. Sometimes I like to imagine that in another universe I had the tenacity to achieve those goals. They still sounds beautiful and romantic in my head; I simply just can't do them for only myself, I want to share them with others that I care about

The main dream I had that I gave up on was to be a pilot. I just can't justify the cost of school (usually at least $100k)

Now I have a backup plan if I fail ctb to just work temporary jobs so I can travel a lot more. I've gave up on plenty of dreams already so very little has significance to me.

Me too!!

 

[pilotviolin]

i used to want to be a geologist. on my end of primary/elementary school yearbook i pretended not to know what geologist meant and put rock scientist in the career section bc i thought i would fit in better by not knowing the words. i have no interest in rocks outside of aesthetic value now but the moment sticks in my head for many reasons.

 

[BojackHorseman]

Paleontologist
I wanted to move out west and get a PhD in paleontology. Hopefully meet another fellow paleontologist and fall in love and spend our lives working together.

Writer
I love to write and I'm told I write well, but as someone before me put it I have nothing interesting to say. I'm not creative enough to come up with fun stories or anything.

So now I work in a specialized healthcare field that although I'm told I'm above average at, I fucking hate it.

 

[Arachno]

When I was much younger I fantasized about owning a spider zoo or something like that and I actually thought I could do it in the future lmao, I still find myself interested in arachnids, but just like my interest in guns, I don't have any real way to apply this interest.
As for the more recent ones, I had dreams of becoming a programmer but turns out I'm complete garbage at learning such things and now I know it's just not something for me.