What are the most infuriating things that mental health “professionals” say to you?

[willitpass]

"you're wasting a bed for someone who actually needs it"
"you're only here because your family couldn't handle you anymore"-a nurse on my first day in a residential
"it's anxiety that you need to work on in therapy"-my psychiatric currently after explaining i have horrible concentration issues and can't get anything done
"you need to start working on that in therapy"-my psychiatrist when i told her i'm struggling with my trauma from mental health treatment
"eat some brownies" "paint" "go on a walk (it was 1am)"-suicide hotline people

 

[AndrewWood'sDeath]

"You play the victim role here" after talking about childhood neglect.

"You should practice mindfulness twic a day" after telling I want to die and that I can't take it anymore.

"Well I don't see scars on your arms?" after admitting I was struggeling with self harm (the scars were obviously hidden behind clothes).

This seriously, I cut my shoulders and upper arms to make sure I don't look shady with covered wrists all the time (at this point I still have to wear long sleeves and just roll them up to my elbows but it still looks less obvious than wearing longsleeves in a Florida summer) and anytime I mention self harm they start once overing me and looking for it. B**** if it was visible you'd probably call me an attention seeker and say it was a cry for help instead of just me enjoying hurting myself. Even me cutting myself has to be about other people apparently lmao fuvjk

 

[completely-done]

"Suicide is the easy way out" - incredibly invalidating and this increases my desire to ctb. So jokes is on them every time they say this, pushing me closer to the edge

 

[Thequietone]

"You have capacity" even though they've sectioned me 25 times?

"How can we keep you safe today?" … staying "safe" today, only prolongs the pain for another day.

What really angers you, with regards to these so called "professionals"?

When I was a minor and had a kinda good day and went to my therapist, she said I looked depressed and suicidal and she didn't want to let me go out of her office. I was like wtf I'm ok. She let me out but I quit therapy after, convinced my parents.

Now I have a therapist again, he is good but I think I wanna CTB still. I don't want to live anymore, tired as fuck.

 

[Gsvko]

Me: "I feel pain and apathy from being judged here in therapy."
Therapist: "Oh, you're depressed? How about pills..."
Me: "No."
Therapist: "The speed and certainty in your answer indicate to me that you're resisting recovery, otherwise you'd say that you'd think about it."
Dude...Didn't expect that level of ignorant prickness.
Also when I'm not exactly enthusiastic about the new age bullshyt such as collective deep breathing sessions out of stomach pRoPeRly with eyes closed (wtf), mindfulness to feel the fabric under my butt, colouring with pencils while thinking about offing myself, or their proposed small self-care goals that don't even fit my personality and are stupid anyway: "See! You're resisting recovery."
Why god, how Take me, please. I'll pray to you even though you don't exist. Long live forced placebo! Fcking hell...

 

[markimobzzdeasui]

''The patient has no history of any trauma'' - Thanks. The plethora of physical and verbal abuse,abandonment and having a Cluster B personality disordered malignant narcissistic as your parent is surely not traumatic at all.
Me- I am unable to sleep for more than 4-5 hours a day for so many years because of the flashbacks of my abuse. Doctor- Just sleep. Otherwise you will never be okay.
''Your social anxiety,tinnitus and severe memory loss is not real. You are just paranoid and making problems out of thin air''

 

[AndrewWood'sDeath]

''The patient has no history of any trauma'' - Thanks. The plethora of physical and verbal abuse,abandonment and having a Cluster B personality disordered malignant narcissistic as your parent is surely not traumatic at all.
Me- I am unable to sleep for more than 4-5 hours a day for so many years because of the flashbacks of my abuse. Doctor- Just sleep. Otherwise you will never be okay.
''Your social anxiety,tinnitus and severe memory loss is not real. You are just paranoid and making problems out of thin air''

Jesus fake christ that is just fucking insane like what human garbage. I'm sorry but that just really pisses me off. Whether they are psychosomatic or not (and I am sure as hell not saying they are) its real to you and that would be some VERY serious and incredibly damaging paranoia that should surely be taken seriously? WTF Like if you were having delusions that you have memory loss (and I am not saying you are not actually having it) that would be a psychosis symptom and should surely be adresses?! Further more you can't access the memories and that is a purely mental condition so unlike something like tinnitus if it's real to you, its real period. Damn jeez

 

[markimobzzdeasui]

Jesus fake christ that is just fucking insane like what human garbage. I'm sorry but that just really pisses me off. Whether they are psychosomatic or not (and I am sure as hell not saying they are) its real to you and that would be some VERY serious and incredibly damaging paranoia that should surely be taken seriously? WTF Like if you were having delusions that you have memory loss (and I am not saying you are not actually having it) that would be a psychosis symptom and should surely be adresses?! Further more you can't access the memories and that is a purely mental condition so unlike something like tinnitus if it's real to you, its real period. Damn jeez

Thanks. It is just the tip of the iceberg of damages those doctors caused me.

 

[freedompass]

How about 'where do you see yourself in 5 years time?' Or 'we need to set some goals' (so my 'worker' can tick boxes on her paperwork 'proving' some kind of desirable outcome).

Was really interesting reading all of these. I feel like I've got off lightly by comparison with some of you. They never want to accept that a person can just be fucking done with life. Or have the humility to realise when they should just shut the fuck up, there are indeed some 'permanent problems' that no amount of facile knee jerk suggestions will ever solve.

 

[Eternity]

This seriously, I cut my shoulders and upper arms to make sure I don't look shady with covered wrists all the time (at this point I still have to wear long sleeves and just roll them up to my elbows but it still looks less obvious than wearing longsleeves in a Florida summer) and anytime I mention self harm they start once overing me and looking for it. B**** if it was visible you'd probably call me an attention seeker and say it was a cry for help instead of just me enjoying hurting myself. Even me cutting myself has to be about other people apparently lmao fuvjk

I can relate, same story here. And when it becomes too hot for long sleeves, I try to cover up with make up. But yes when you mention self harm they just look at you to see if they can see scars on your wrists. If that's the case they assume you're just looking for attention. Dumbasses.

 

[ncmxm]

"I don't think you're depressed, you've done a lot and you got into uni" - when I was talking about how I was failing classes at said uni because of depression

"Everything is possible, you're not working hard enough, you need to work harder" - when I was talking about how people are born different with aptitudes for difficult things and what is possible for one person may never be possible for another

 

[Badluckhardtimes]

"How would you like to pay today Pedro....er i mean Peter?"

For the entire session...
"Yeah, uh huh, that's right, oh wow, uh oh, better be careful....wow, look at that, we are out of time already, see you in 6 weeks"

Six weeks and $475 dollars later...
"Hey there Paul, I mean Pedro...oh wait no Peter, how are you today?"

The entire session im yapping and the "highly educated PhD" goes...

"Yeah, uh huh, uh oh, oh no don't do that, why do you think that is, uh huh, yeah...way to go. Boy you are making progress. Oh, look at the time, and by the way, your insurance only wants to pay this much, so you owe me $5000 with interest.Dont you feel so lucky to be sitting here today with such a well learned, self aggrandizing, pretentious asshole like myself? Look at all my diplomas from medical school. I drive a Porsche to work and get my dick sucked everyday. How would you like to pay?"

 

[LivideLamb]

After four years of intense therapy, every Wednesday afternoon that never seemed to end, they told me that they "couldn't help me anymore", that I was "a lost cause", and that since they, apparently, couldn't help me anymore well they didn't want to see me anymore and that I had to find another doctor. Hearing professionals call you a lost cause really do something

 

[noname223]

After four years of intense therapy, every Wednesday afternoon that never seemed to end, they told me that they "couldn't help me anymore", that I was "a lost cause", and that since they, apparently, couldn't help me anymore well they didn't want to see me anymore and that I had to find another doctor. Hearing professionals call you a lost cause really do something

Happened to me twice. Horrible feeling. Both think I gonna kill myself in the future due to the coming poverty. I think they are absoltutely right with their analysis.

 

[LivideLamb]

Happened to me twice. Horrible feeling. Both think I gonna kill myself in the future due to the coming poverty. I think they are absoltutely right with their analysis.

Freaking horrible. No one should hear such awful words. Especially not coming from a professional ; they studied psychology for years, they should know better.

I think they are absoltutely right with their analysis.

Wishing you luck, sunny days ahead, and peace whatever you choose.

 

[Angi]

[Removed]

This is the most enfuriating list I have read in a very long time. I bow to you, for keeping your head on your shoulders over all of this. Mine would simply have flow off, driven by all the steam. So many of these things are not just plain wrong, they have been proven wrong. I bow to you, and I send you respect. I wish you would never be denied your due share of it again.

Particularily "Are you sure this really happened?", next thing they might have said "Can you present proof? No, you did not videotape what happened to you when you were little? Well in that case, it does not count." AAAAHH!

And of course, not strictly a mental health professional, but when I was asked questions like:

'do you think what you were wearing could have led him on?'

By a 'specially trained' police officer in my interview following being raped.

How can this still be reality? There are even museums that show it does not matter the slightest what you are wearing, mini skirt, men's clothes, uniform, pjs, nothing will protect you. On some days I have doubts, today I am glad I never confided in the police, since they are clearly not ready to protect victims.

 

[Intelligent_Panic99]

I've heard a lot of this too.

Also,

"suicidal people don't actually want to die"

"You need to choose between being alive and dying"
(Ok, I choose dying ... but it's not that easy - I didn't have any SN or actual, workable method at that time, plus there are of course other hangups.)

And the thing that shuts me down:
"You're children need you" and from my psychiatrist (this is a summary): "I often use people's children to keep them alive until the medication can do its work"
(My kids aren't a tool and trust me I KNOW what they need.)

 

[PDAnnie2610]

There's some professionals who knows that what some of us need is a safe space to cry, rant and have our feelings respected and acknowledged. Unfortunately, it's rare to come across such professionals.

 

[LeapOfFaith]

I was about 13 years old at the time. I did not want to go to the therapist but my parents forced me. I had tried to commit suicide by jumping a couple of months prior to this. I sat there and answered her questions one by one but I did not speak as much as she wanted me to. So after 20+ visits to her office she said the following to me:

"I do not understand why you keep coming here if you won't speak to me about your issues. They can't be that bad if you aren't even willing to get help with processing them together with a professional, like you have been offered to do here".

After this happened they basically stuffed me with anti-depressants and failed again and again to find a working solution.
I did not want to live, why would I open up my heart and soul to a complete stranger who thinks she can solve all my problems just by looking me in the eyes and filling me up with drugs.

I broke both my legs in the attempt..they are semi-ok now though. (10+ years later.)

 

[ultrafuntimes]

I have treatment resistant depression, but if I don't act like I've made some improvement, my psychiatrist always says anything along the lines of
"you aren't trying hard enough in therapy" or "do you even want get better?"

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

"You need to stop acting so autistic around important people."

"Sit up and work on your posture, stop slouching, no wonder you aren't being taken seriously when you advocate for yourself."

"You have to put the work in yourself, I cant do anything."

"I'm sure it'll get better when you turn 18. I'm aware your family doesn't let you leave the house or let you go to school, but don't you have any hobbies to distract yourself in the meantime?"

"I can't help you, I'm not an expert in ptsd. You need a trauma specialist. These two charge around 500 per session, and I've spoken to both of them about your lack of parents and financial situation, however they are unwilling to lower their prices."

"You need to change your attitude and practice gratitude. Stop thinking about what you can't have."

"I don't know what else I can prescribe, except antipsychotics. They are safe and effective for ptsd and autism, I know you don't want to try them, but you must take them."

"You said you used marijuana a couple of times, to try and help with chronic pain? And that you drank once in the past 6 months, at an event where alcohol was provided? *writes in my medical records that I have a substance abuse disorder*"

"All those men used you up like a sex toy, huh."

"*rolling her eyes when I said a doctor molested me*"

"We're just trying to keep you safe. It's because people care and worry about you."

"All of the autistic people I've come across have been nonfunctional and requiring care, or had amazing talents. Surely you must have a talent."

"You're not thinking of hurting yourself, are you? If you are, I have to contact a hospital."

"You articulate yourself well for a person with autism."

"Look me in the eyes. Do it, look me in the eyes now. You will get over this refusal to make eye contact."

"I referred you to rheumatology and you didn't go. Why? You need to get off the pot and seek real treatment *ignores ptsd and tells me that I need to go to rheumatology with 0 adjustments or accommodations when rheumatology hung up the phone on me when I said I didn't want examinations without consent*"

After me telling NHS staff that doctors caused me to have ptsd," Well, you just need to speak to your GP, help is out there. "

"Don't make me have to come out here again." after a suicide attempt.

"You're depressed and anxious and it's causing you to feel exhausted *refuses to allow me to have a blood test which revealed glaring vitamin deficiencies*"

"Your medicine won't work unless you go to therapy and see more doctors."

"You aren't allowed to speak to anyone outside of group and if you do you will be removed from group therapy."

"Wow, you know more about these medications than I do."

"Well, even though it says there's a high risk for these drug interactions, you should always follow what the doctor says rather than googling things. Stop taking matters into your own hands and acting like you're the expert, huh, doctor KuriGohan."

"This 26 year old man is bad news, but I cant stop you from seeing him, you're still in high school but you're almost fully grown. You know what you're doing."

"Do you think you know better than the experts?"

"You have to stick with it, even if you're experiencing horrible side effects. Don't give up and be a quitter."

"You have to get over it."

"Wow, I've never seen someone with so much trauma!"

"Are you sure this really happened, or are you depicting people in a false way in your head?"

"Just think of something else and count using numbers when you're having a PTSD spell. You can control your thoughts."

 

[raghu1977]

"'You have to be stronger"

Yeahhhhhhh….. suuuure!

Let me just find that strength setting in the app and turn it way up. Of course - it's so simple. What was I even thinking? Duhhh

 

[theloserestloser]

My last therapist told me I was too proud to get help.

I don't know what about willingly going to therapy made me too proud to get help but I quit all mental health treatment after that.

My last psychiatrist scrapped my earlier psych's treatment plan, refused to believe my history on serotonin agents (I have a long history of serotonin syndrome) and tried to prescribe me SSRIs. When I refused, she told me that I could either do what she said or stop being medicated. My college only has one psychiatrist so she was my only option so I just had to quit medication instead. Hooray.

 

[Seiba]

"You need to stop acting so autistic around important people."

holy shit. i already knew your experiences were bad with doctors and therapist in the past but it's no wonder you feel like never bothering with any therapist or pill giver ever again. "there is help out there." right..

you probably already know, but you should have never needed to be subjected to even one line of this. anyone who has even ten percent knowledge of your experiences with therapy and doctors in your life should never try to tell you to get "help" or you need to go to a therapist.

 

[ceserasera]

So. Many. Things. Just a few: my suicidal ideation is 'an aggressive use of the matter'. Asking me 'what does 'help' mean?' when I desperately ask for help. Categorising your risk into ruddy traffic lights of green, amber and red as if it's that simple. Writing about your 'alleged' abuse as if you'd make that sort of thing up. And one of my favourites: saying that it's 'understandable' that I was physically abused because I was a 'difficult child', then writing that I'm 'uncooperative' and 'hostile' because I don't want to talk to them after everything they've said and done.