Was I....never meant to make friends in college?

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

The first club I joined in my college, an anime club because I love e anime, was the most toxic place I ever visited. I was sexually assaulted and faced bullying there. I also witnessed other students face racial bullying and toxicity amongst members openly. Am I the only one who had this college experience? Why does everything in life bad happen to me.....all I wanted was a normal life....they always said "college is better than high school" "people are more mature" "you meet your best friends" "its the best 4 years of your life"....is it true.....or a lie...?

 

[krsu]

i got bullied throughout middle school and high school to the point where I was too scared to even go to college... my last year of highschool I pretty much snapped and started getting very violent towards anyone who tried to pick on me and I think that did the trick, I got expelled on like my last day of school for beating the fuck out of someone who was pushing me around in class.

Edit: have you looked into online courses?

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

i got bullied throughout middle school and high school to the point where I was too scared to even go to college... my last year of highschool I pretty much snapped and started getting very violent towards anyone who tried to pick on me and I think that did the trick, I got expelled on like my last day of school for beating the fuck out of someone who was pushing me around in class

I'm glad you stood up for yourself. I am too much of a pussy to do anything but take abuse and then use suicide as revenge

 

[krsu]

I'm glad you stood up for yourself. I am too much of a pussy to do anything but take abuse and then use suicide as revenge

I am a pussy too but I was able to do it because I thought to myself "ok I already self harm and wanna die, so what's the difference if someone else inflicts pain on me?"

I think eventually you will overcome bullying, once you stop caring they will stop caring because they don't get the reaction out of you that they wanted

 

[Lost in a Dream]

I'm sorry that you had such a terrible experience at college and in the anime club. I certainly don't think that everyone has experiences like these, but sadly, lots of people do. I can say that from my experience, going to work or college isn't any different than high school. Even the people I work with who are in the ages of 30 - 60 are still about as mature as they were when they were 15 - 18. There is so much drama there and they are always spreading rumors and talking shit about each other behind each other's backs. I have no way of knowing what things are true and which ones are not, since I barely trust anyone in the first place.

Luckily I haven't been there long enough for those things to be a problem for me and I try to be as nice and helpful as I can to everyone so it doesn't become an issue, but even then, it won't protect me forever and I imagine that going to another job will put me in the same type of environment, just with different people and different stories. I am convinced that there are more horrible people in our world than good ones, which is why I want to leave it as soon as possible. I didn't make any friends in college either and I dropped out because it was a waste of time and energy anyway.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I'm sorry that you had such a terrible experience at college and in the anime club. I certainly don't think that everyone has experiences like these, but sadly, lots of people do. I can say that from my experience, going to work or college isn't any different than high school. Even the people I work with who are in the ages of 30 - 60 are still about as mature as they were when they were 15 - 18. There is so much drama there and they are always spreading rumors and talking shit about each other behind each other's backs. I have no way of knowing what things are true and which ones are not, since I barely trust anyone in the first place.

Luckily I haven't been there long enough for those things to be a problem for me and I try to be as nice and helpful as I can to everyone so it doesn't become an issue, but even then, it won't protect me forever and I imagine that going to another job will put me in the same type of environment, just with different people and different stories. I am convinced that there are more horrible people in our world than good ones, which is why I want to leave it as soon as possible. I didn't make any friends in college either and I dropped out because it was a waste of time and energy anyway.

Glad to know I am not the only one. I saw a Bunch of immature crap at my college. Its nuts.

 

[Torbasco]

I understand how you feel, I faced some serious abuse when I went to school, some very physical that's painful to remember. I just never had to remaining mental capacity for college. Some people just get an unlucky hand in life, I wish either of us could have been more fortunate. At the very least, I assure you that things will get better once you move past it.

 

[HelensNepenthe]

I'm still attending college and have yet to make any amount of friends. I'm actively involved in a group chat with some students in our program. It isn't that active.

 

[Sad_Autistic_boy_101]

At the local college there is an autism base and that's where I got support from and I watched a teacher being sexually assaulted by another teacher. As he blocked my exit and I didn't know what to do.
It's terrible that sexual assault can happen in a place that's meant to be safe. Being autistic makes it impossible to make friends in person rather than online so I don't even bother anymore.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

At the local college there is an autism base and that's where I got support from and I watched a teacher being sexually assaulted by another teacher. As he blocked my exit and I didn't know what to do.
It's terrible that sexual assault can happen in a place that's meant to be safe. Being autistic makes it impossible to make friends in person rather than online so I don't even bother anymore.

My god that is so horrendous. I feel bad you had to witness that and that the dirtbag blocked you. Did he/she ever get any punishment?

 

[Suez]

The first club I joined in my college, an anime club because I love e anime, was the most toxic place I ever visited. I was sexually assaulted and faced bullying there. I also witnessed other students face racial bullying and toxicity amongst members openly. Am I the only one who had this college experience? Why does everything in life bad happen to me.....all I wanted was a normal life....they always said "college is better than high school" "people are more mature" "you meet your best friends" "its the best 4 years of your life"....is it true.....or a lie...?

That should never have happened to you. Im so sorry that you were sexually assaulted and bullied. There is absolutely no justification for that kind of sick behaviour. It doesnt matter who you are, your gender ,race, age, or where it happens, its not acceptable. You are entitled to a "normal" life as everyone is, unfortunately there will always be bullies out there and people that like taking advantage of others for their sick pleasure. Dont allow what happened to you to determine what happens to you here on in ok? THERE WAS NO JUSTIFICATION FOR WHAT THEY DID. THEY ARE SICK PEOPLE.

 

[raindrops]

Could you look for study partners? (sorry if that sounds stupid)

I had a boyfriend in college, I had no friends really because I only wanted to be with him.
wish I just focused on my course and worried about finishing it.
my mum would say "you don't go school to make friends" I get what she meant now.

I don't try to seek friendships, I let it come naturally with whoever I connect with. I say that but I don't trust people. True colours show eventually.
Sometimes I think fck this I'd rather enjoy my own company instead of befriending a jealous liar.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Could you look for study partners? (sorry if that sounds stupid)

I had a boyfriend in college, I had no friends really because I only wanted to be with him.
wish I just focused on my course and worried about finishing it.
my mum would say "you don't go school to make friends" I get what she meant now.

I don't try to seek friendships, I let it come naturally with whoever I connect with. I say that but I don't trust people. True colours show eventually.
Sometimes I think fck this I'd rather enjoy my own company instead of befriending a jealous liar.

I feel you. Actually a pat of me wants ot go out and protest tomorrow and talk to people. However I am so emotionally crippled that one bad reaction could make me want to jump off a bridge

 

[Emily123]

oh honey . i am sorry that happened to you. This world is full of sick people . i was rapped a number of times when i was a kid/teenager or even after it . i just want you to know that no everybody is like the monsters who did to us . there are also good people in the world . you are not also alone . there are many people who had your experience . it was not our fault that those monsters did that to us . it was absolutely their fault . we were just victims

 

[raindrops]

I feel you. Actually a pat of me wants ot go out and protest tomorrow and talk to people. However I am so emotionally crippled that one bad reaction could make me want to jump off a bridge

One day at a time, if you want to go and feel really good about going definitely try go! <3
I know what you mean, I'm emotionally crippled. I mostly over think things so I'm trying to practice mindfulness.
I got a notebook and started to write all of the things I'm grateful for on one page, now I write in it daily, how I feel, what I ate, what the weather is like. I don't read what I put yesterday, I don't correct my spelling and I don't think what to write, I just write what I want.
Maybe that's why I type loads of crap about my life here, it feels good to let it out. I need a notebook with more pages than the bible!!
As for jumping of a bridge.... think before you leap!!

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

One day at a time, if you want to go and feel really good about going definitely try go! <3
I know what you mean, I'm emotionally crippled. I mostly over think things so I'm trying to practice mindfulness.
I got a notebook and started to write all of the things I'm grateful for on one page, now I write in it daily, how I feel, what I ate, what the weather is like. I don't read what I put yesterday, I don't correct my spelling and I don't think what to write, I just write what I want.
Maybe that's why I type loads of crap about my life here, it feels good to let it out. I need a notebook with more pages than the bible!!
As for jumping of a bridge.... think before you leap!!

I have bad social anxiety. Like the thought of taking openly just breaks me down. Then again I'm just one person so what difference do I make lololol :(

 

[Vault of Memories]

The best 4 years of my life were far before college or high school.

 

[Lethe]

I did enjoy college (because I loved my major), but I didn't make any friends either. Though I never went out of my way to try to make any because, by that point, I was already completely cynical of people and had no interest in human interaction. I will say people there definitely aren't more mature as a rule (unless they've faced true hardships, that usually does it), and I was bullied by a few students and professors.

 

[Sad_Autistic_boy_101]

My god that is so horrendous. I feel bad you had to witness that and that the dirtbag blocked you. Did he/she ever get any punishment?

The staff reported some of it and the man got fired and then she left. Not sure if he ever went to prison or not!

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I did enjoy college (because I loved my major), but I didn't make any friends either. Though I never went out of my way to try to make any because, by that point, I was already completely cynical of people and had no interest in human interaction. I will say people there definitely aren't more mature as a rule (unless they've faced true hardships, that usually does it), and I was bullied by a few students and professors.

That breaks my heart. Yeah I hate how everyone would always tell me "college has real friends and bullying doesn't exist" what a load of crap. I think the advice we should be given is "life will be challenging regardless of where you end up. College, work, and even beyond that, there will be bullies, toxic people, and hardship. Things dont magically get better as you get older. But there are ways to manage them."
While its nice to know I am not the only one, I feel bad that you got bullied not only by your peers by by your professors as well

 

[Simba]

At the local college there is an autism base and that's where I got support from ... being autistic makes it impossible to make friends in person rather than online so I don't even bother anymore.

I can relate. I'm also diagnosed with HFA/ Asperger's Syndrome and im not too good at friendships relationships etc ,let alone at maintaining them :( a lot of times i think to myself too that maybe i should just give up that it doesn't matter what I'd do.. people will always end up leaving me somehow - and that's the people that i like that actually made me feel a bit good and not as depressed :( i keep wondering if what i was meant to do here on this planet is just suffer and so on :( Also ,im sorry to know you had to see some "Teacher" assaulting another teacher :( He must've been a crappy teacher that he'd stoop that low :(

 

[StillWaiting]

Sorry that that happened to you.
I also didn't have a good experience while I was in an anime club during my university years.
I don't think college life will be any better because of the chances of meeting nice people are still very slim.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Sorry that that happened to you.
I also didn't have a good experience while I was in an anime club during my university years.
I don't think college life will be any better because of the chances of meeting nice people are still very slim.

I am glad to know that I am not alone. I am sorry for your experience.

 

[socrates]

Yeah I don't think collage is much better then high school, hey look at the internet is high school for 40 year olds. Also there is no such thing as "best" There was a time when the Super Nintendo had the best graphics. What is best will always change.

Maybe you should find people from your anime group who agree about it's toxicity and invite them to a secret anime club with out the bad stuff. You could watch Cory in the House and play that KFC dating sim

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Yeah I don't think collage is much better then high school, hey look at the internet is high school for 40 year olds. Also there is no such thing as "best" There was a time when the Super Nintendo had the best graphics. What is best will always change.

Maybe you should find people from your anime group who agree about it's toxicity and invite them to a secret anime club with out the bad stuff. You could watch Cory in the House and play that KFC dating sim

Thats not a bad idea lol. But I have moved on from the group. But life goes on and better people exist elsewhere

 

[Lethe]

There was a time when the Super Nintendo had the best graphics.

Whoa, dial it back a bit with the controversial statements there, Socrates. Lol