trashisland
outsider
- Aug 5, 2025
- 140
its so frustrating. I hate burdening others with my problems because I dont feel like anyone will even care, and theyd consider me more of a nuisance than anything else. I struggle to even be fully honest with mental health professionals because of this very issue. I hate pity and I hate attention from others and the thought of someone treating me differently or looking down on me because I struggle makes me sick. im a very introverted person in general, so thats another thing too. I dont really like opening up. yet at the same time I want someone to care about me. every time I think about the fact my mother didn't read the suicide note I left once when I was 15 and instead was more pissed off that I skipped school and the fact she had to get the police to look for me, I get a little sad. maybe I can't admit it fully or say it, but I definitely have an emotional reaction to the thought that no one cares. its like I dont even know what I want from other people at this point and it sucks feeling this way
