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INTRO
Hello everybody.
Sometimes, for no particular reason, i suddenly feel an energy surge and a will to take back my life.
These times my head starts working and making sense (like, scientiffically, i guess)
And particularly today, i have been illuminated with a great hypothesis.
So i decided to start this (post? thread? - kinda confused) to record my way to gain control over my life again.
If it works, it could be a useful blueprint for anybody. If it doesn´t... At least is some useful information about somebody else that tried and failed.
I talked about a hypothesis, which i think it makes a lot of sense based on my previous observations.
Here it is:
"IF YOU WANT TO LIVE, COMMIT YOUR LIFE TO SOMETHING, FROM BEGINNING TO END"
What does that mean?
You (probably, idk, i´m talking about myself but maybe you feel reflected in some way) don´t really want to die. You want some kind of life that is currently impossible for you to build. So... you decide to bend to CTB some day, because there is nothing else and you are tired of all this shit.
By doing so, you eventually forget what you really wanted. And from time to time, you try to "rediscover" who you are, probably based on what you were.
BUT THIS IS WRONG.
You know what normal people do? They commit to something. It doesn´t really matter what: A political space, a career, a person, a dream, a project, a routine, a mere aspect of themselves. And that is exactly what we all did a loooong time ago, when we were "fine". (it went fatally wrong, and you know the consecuences within yourselves)
So what we need to do is get anything. Whatever. And give it all we got. Don´t get me wrong: Don´t commit your life to stupid and impossible things; nor to old dreams. Leave the past rest while you look at the future.
What´s the use of this? It gives you an artificial purpose. Something greater than yourself. And if you take it seriously, you will make sure you will want to see "tomorrow".
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EXAMPLE
Let me bring this down to earth with a practical example:
I want to die. But i saw something extremely stupid. Useless. Ignored. Small. Whatever. It´s my old and broken motorcycle. But it made me feel a little good (first sign of compatibility). So i plan some LITTLE thing around it: I will check it´s status. If it gives me a little feeling of "yeah, this would be cool" (which it does), there is the second (and last needed) sign of compatibility.
Then, i plan something BIG but REALIST about it: Make it road once more.
So i commit my life to fix it. Then i start gathering what i need to do so:
Do i need money? -> yes -> get a job (i hate that job? It´s ok, i´m suffering with PURPOSE)
Do i need friends? -> Probably no -> Discard this need
Do i need to eat while i fix it? -> Yes -> i can´t skip a meal, as it means i lose strength and then i can´t work
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PRE - CONCLUSSION
The important thing is that it´s not EPIC and it´s not IMPOSSIBLE, at least as i see things. Also, after that, i will have something that makes me feel a little better, and the wheel starts to spin.
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BAD EXAMPLE
This would be a BAD choice for me:
I want to die. But i met someone kind. Good. like me in some ways. Whatever. I like to hang out with this person (first sign of compatibility). So i plan some LITTLE thing around it: I will try to be friends. If it gives me a little feeling of "yeah, this would be cool" there is the second (and last needed) sign of compatibility.... but in this case i find myself afraid of losing what i don´t even have.
So i should get the hell out of there. But let´s imagine the hell of trying anyway:
I commit my life to have friends. Then i start gathering what i need to do so:
Do i need money? -> I don´t know, some people have friends anyway... but what if this is not the case? -> get a job, maybe??? (i hate that job? It´s ok, i´m probably suffering twice as needed. Life is shit)
Do i need social capabilities? -> 100% yes -> how the hell am i supposed to learn all that, considering all my life tried and got 0 results? (i´m screwed)
Do i need luck? -> Considering just the previous 2 things, yes -> I never had this.
So i will never be able to do something BASIC that EVERIBODY does easily... There is something wrong with me. I should die.
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3RD PERSON POINTS OF VIEW
I guess i made my point here.
Let me reinforce it with what i saw on other people.
I have an acquaintance that has no money, no house, no job, is ugly and does drugs. He desperately wants a girl, so he is everyday thinking and doing things around it. Do you think he wants to die, even in that deplorable status? NO. HE HAS PURPOSE. A stupid one, but IT WORKS.
I saw people working on a gas station (worst job i ever had). Do you know what is in their heads? They are always wanting to buy some expensive shit. So they work willingly just to get that, then forget about it and start running to something else.
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PRELIMINAR CONCLUSSION
Another way to see the conclussion:
We were told to not be that rat running behind the piece of cheese... But reality is, that if we lose the will to do so, the suffering is bigger and a premature death is guaranteed. So we must find anything, think of it as cheese, and start moving! It´s easy, actually. The bigger the cheese, the faster it moves, but the longest it keeps you alive.
"IF YOU WANT TO LIVE, COMMIT YOUR LIFE TO SOMETHING, FROM BEGINNING TO END"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I guess that´s all i have today. Good luck, and let´s try our best to find a meaning in life.
Let me know if you think i´m wrong: Let´s find the way out together.
INTRO
Hello everybody.
Sometimes, for no particular reason, i suddenly feel an energy surge and a will to take back my life.
These times my head starts working and making sense (like, scientiffically, i guess)
And particularly today, i have been illuminated with a great hypothesis.
So i decided to start this (post? thread? - kinda confused) to record my way to gain control over my life again.
If it works, it could be a useful blueprint for anybody. If it doesn´t... At least is some useful information about somebody else that tried and failed.
I talked about a hypothesis, which i think it makes a lot of sense based on my previous observations.
Here it is:
"IF YOU WANT TO LIVE, COMMIT YOUR LIFE TO SOMETHING, FROM BEGINNING TO END"
What does that mean?
You (probably, idk, i´m talking about myself but maybe you feel reflected in some way) don´t really want to die. You want some kind of life that is currently impossible for you to build. So... you decide to bend to CTB some day, because there is nothing else and you are tired of all this shit.
By doing so, you eventually forget what you really wanted. And from time to time, you try to "rediscover" who you are, probably based on what you were.
BUT THIS IS WRONG.
You know what normal people do? They commit to something. It doesn´t really matter what: A political space, a career, a person, a dream, a project, a routine, a mere aspect of themselves. And that is exactly what we all did a loooong time ago, when we were "fine". (it went fatally wrong, and you know the consecuences within yourselves)
So what we need to do is get anything. Whatever. And give it all we got. Don´t get me wrong: Don´t commit your life to stupid and impossible things; nor to old dreams. Leave the past rest while you look at the future.
What´s the use of this? It gives you an artificial purpose. Something greater than yourself. And if you take it seriously, you will make sure you will want to see "tomorrow".
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
EXAMPLE
Let me bring this down to earth with a practical example:
I want to die. But i saw something extremely stupid. Useless. Ignored. Small. Whatever. It´s my old and broken motorcycle. But it made me feel a little good (first sign of compatibility). So i plan some LITTLE thing around it: I will check it´s status. If it gives me a little feeling of "yeah, this would be cool" (which it does), there is the second (and last needed) sign of compatibility.
Then, i plan something BIG but REALIST about it: Make it road once more.
So i commit my life to fix it. Then i start gathering what i need to do so:
Do i need money? -> yes -> get a job (i hate that job? It´s ok, i´m suffering with PURPOSE)
Do i need friends? -> Probably no -> Discard this need
Do i need to eat while i fix it? -> Yes -> i can´t skip a meal, as it means i lose strength and then i can´t work
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PRE - CONCLUSSION
The important thing is that it´s not EPIC and it´s not IMPOSSIBLE, at least as i see things. Also, after that, i will have something that makes me feel a little better, and the wheel starts to spin.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BAD EXAMPLE
This would be a BAD choice for me:
I want to die. But i met someone kind. Good. like me in some ways. Whatever. I like to hang out with this person (first sign of compatibility). So i plan some LITTLE thing around it: I will try to be friends. If it gives me a little feeling of "yeah, this would be cool" there is the second (and last needed) sign of compatibility.... but in this case i find myself afraid of losing what i don´t even have.
So i should get the hell out of there. But let´s imagine the hell of trying anyway:
I commit my life to have friends. Then i start gathering what i need to do so:
Do i need money? -> I don´t know, some people have friends anyway... but what if this is not the case? -> get a job, maybe??? (i hate that job? It´s ok, i´m probably suffering twice as needed. Life is shit)
Do i need social capabilities? -> 100% yes -> how the hell am i supposed to learn all that, considering all my life tried and got 0 results? (i´m screwed)
Do i need luck? -> Considering just the previous 2 things, yes -> I never had this.
So i will never be able to do something BASIC that EVERIBODY does easily... There is something wrong with me. I should die.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3RD PERSON POINTS OF VIEW
I guess i made my point here.
Let me reinforce it with what i saw on other people.
I have an acquaintance that has no money, no house, no job, is ugly and does drugs. He desperately wants a girl, so he is everyday thinking and doing things around it. Do you think he wants to die, even in that deplorable status? NO. HE HAS PURPOSE. A stupid one, but IT WORKS.
I saw people working on a gas station (worst job i ever had). Do you know what is in their heads? They are always wanting to buy some expensive shit. So they work willingly just to get that, then forget about it and start running to something else.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PRELIMINAR CONCLUSSION
Another way to see the conclussion:
We were told to not be that rat running behind the piece of cheese... But reality is, that if we lose the will to do so, the suffering is bigger and a premature death is guaranteed. So we must find anything, think of it as cheese, and start moving! It´s easy, actually. The bigger the cheese, the faster it moves, but the longest it keeps you alive.
"IF YOU WANT TO LIVE, COMMIT YOUR LIFE TO SOMETHING, FROM BEGINNING TO END"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I guess that´s all i have today. Good luck, and let´s try our best to find a meaning in life.
Let me know if you think i´m wrong: Let´s find the way out together.
