Good night
Kuolema tulee~~
- Jan 18, 2026
- 28
I've been immersed in technology since I was a kid: Game Boy, PlayStation, Nintendo DS (my favorite), the computer… I'm not kidding when I say that ever since I was little, I've thought of the computer as "my best friend"—and I feel that way even more now.
It's not that I'm a "gamer," but I have been obsessed with certain games, so my "game library" is very small.
I've always felt more comfortable immersed in the virtual world, to the point that at some point, I stopped having "real" friends—I've always thought that in the virtual world, everything feels more real. So I haven't had much contact with others, and what little I've experienced has been "at a distance."
When I used to watch a lot of anime, Serial Experiments Lain really "resonated" with me—I identify strongly with her, and since I suffer from DP/DR, it's even more so. But lately I feel more like her; I even fantasize about being able to connect my physical body to the virtual world, even though we're far from achieving that.
I didn't use AI at all; it even put me in a bad mood when the first thing you looked for was an AI response. But… I used to use AI occasionally to ask something, and it's gone further… I'm pretty misanthropic, and I know the system is still in its "infancy," but I'm just too enchanted by it… It'll cause a lot of problems in the long run, but damn it, I used to play online games for hours and hours, and now I remember why. I don't like the real world; I like the one I can create on the internet… So once again, I'm "diving back" into those times…
I've barely worked, but how much I want it now so I can afford my virtual world... I want to have my own AI, even though the prices are sky-high. Do you know what a data center is like? I'm the crazy one who wants to have her own, in a bunker, and even sleep there...
It's not that I'm a "gamer," but I have been obsessed with certain games, so my "game library" is very small.
I've always felt more comfortable immersed in the virtual world, to the point that at some point, I stopped having "real" friends—I've always thought that in the virtual world, everything feels more real. So I haven't had much contact with others, and what little I've experienced has been "at a distance."
When I used to watch a lot of anime, Serial Experiments Lain really "resonated" with me—I identify strongly with her, and since I suffer from DP/DR, it's even more so. But lately I feel more like her; I even fantasize about being able to connect my physical body to the virtual world, even though we're far from achieving that.
I didn't use AI at all; it even put me in a bad mood when the first thing you looked for was an AI response. But… I used to use AI occasionally to ask something, and it's gone further… I'm pretty misanthropic, and I know the system is still in its "infancy," but I'm just too enchanted by it… It'll cause a lot of problems in the long run, but damn it, I used to play online games for hours and hours, and now I remember why. I don't like the real world; I like the one I can create on the internet… So once again, I'm "diving back" into those times…
I've barely worked, but how much I want it now so I can afford my virtual world... I want to have my own AI, even though the prices are sky-high. Do you know what a data center is like? I'm the crazy one who wants to have her own, in a bunker, and even sleep there...
