i have a peachy sort of life, i don't earn, i don't work, my education could continue but i am on a break and all. i pretty much have things with me, i am poor economically yet i feel i have things that are satisfactory enough to live with being upset. i live with my parents and they want me to pursue higher education, people are forcing me to do so since all the peers are into it. but i am on some sort of break. i want to die but i can't find the means to it. now my reason to do it i can't explain to anyone and it kinda feels like i am getting mocked when someone asks me that. i just want to suicide because of how things turned out and no matter what i do i can never change my life.
anyways, a kid just came to my house so as to ask me for help in some questions in physics. i scored real fuckin' bad but since i am the only senior she came to me. i couldn't say to her properly to just go away since i can't help her ( i am stupid and i don't know the subject well, i borderline passed ). but i said sure i'll clear your doubts and i'll do it tomorrow. i know which topics she's going to ask from and for me it'll be like studying from scratch since i never studied shit. i have a night to prepare and i guess i will. it's about reputation but why do i care about reputation and whatnot, i hate this new me who cares so much about what others think about him. this might be more of a thing i am doing out of self loathing since i am all lazy these days and this could be a good challenge to complete overnight. whatever it is wish me luck if you're reading this and please let me know that your life's good right now, if not you can talk about whatever you want.
( if you can, psychoanalyse me )
anyways, a kid just came to my house so as to ask me for help in some questions in physics. i scored real fuckin' bad but since i am the only senior she came to me. i couldn't say to her properly to just go away since i can't help her ( i am stupid and i don't know the subject well, i borderline passed ). but i said sure i'll clear your doubts and i'll do it tomorrow. i know which topics she's going to ask from and for me it'll be like studying from scratch since i never studied shit. i have a night to prepare and i guess i will. it's about reputation but why do i care about reputation and whatnot, i hate this new me who cares so much about what others think about him. this might be more of a thing i am doing out of self loathing since i am all lazy these days and this could be a good challenge to complete overnight. whatever it is wish me luck if you're reading this and please let me know that your life's good right now, if not you can talk about whatever you want.
( if you can, psychoanalyse me )
