Venting Venting: a notice pattern on the forum

[MrDarkness]

Now I just wanna state, I know this thread is going to piss people off, I'll probably be called a pro lifer or "why are you even here" I've attempted so many times and plan on doing it again sooner. I'm sorry if this thread invalidates others

awhile ago I read a post by venin, saying how this forum, the suicide forum, not off topic not chat, is more pro death then pro choice, and the disregard of slight of recovery.
What is pro death?
The belief that death is the only fix

This is probably due to the constant doom posting of the exact same copy and paste, that life is a prison. Life has no purpose. Nothing matters. Nothing changes. I think these views are extremely sheltered and immature, and really shows that some people don't have a grasp of the world. During my time on the site I'm seeing more and more threads of the repeated topic. And the massive increase of nihilism

Why? Is it just venting the frustration at the world? Or is it ways for others to fit in, or is it people trying to be the same. Or just people who don't want to bother to see any improvement and complain But what worries me is that for others who are curious or are wanting info to end their lives, will be told, that recovery is false or impossible, like the amount of times I've been told that therapy is shit etc is staggering, like do you realize that so many things effect therapy, trauma, depression. The doctors the meds etc.

I just wanna say, the world isn't as doom and gloom as other put it to be, this world has beauty, sure you gotta dig through shit to find it but it's there. The belief that nothing matters is wrong. You have friends and love ones that care, you can laugh and smile, you at least have some happy memories. so there is clearly something that matters. I'm not trying to invalidate others trauma, but at times it's worrying seeing that help/recovery is completely disregarded. I love this site and I've met some wonderful people here.

 

[tsykoais]

You have friends and love ones that care

I agreed up until this point, some people legitimately have no one in their lives that are genuinely there for them.

 

[MrDarkness]

I agreed up until this point, some people legitimately have no one in their lives that are genuinely there for them.

i didnt have friends, until i went on the site, i feel that some people here are not going to ctb in the end, and are here to express their troubles and find those who can relate

 

[dinosavr]

I guess the ones who have good experience with therapy, those who found meds effective and those who changed their lives after being committed to psych ward are simply not coming back on here.
We definitely more often see goodbye threads (right before ctb) than goodbye threads (permanently logging out).
Because of that it seems like there's no point of fighting. We see people's threads about how it all doesn't make sense and we see "joined: 2020"… It's sad how we actually see just one point of view here.
I wish more people came back after healing to share their stories. Anyway I think it's impossible due to the fact that for sure one of the parts of healing is dumping this site completely. Sad :(

 

[MrDarkness]

I guess the ones who have good experience with therapy, those who found meds effective and those who changed their lives after being committed to psych ward are simply not coming back on here.
We definitely more often see goodbye threads (right before ctb) than goodbye threads (permanently logging out).
Because of that it seems like there's no point of fighting. We see people's threads about how it all doesn't make sense and we see "joined: 2020"… It's sad how we actually see just one point of view here.
I wish more people came back after healing to share their stories. Anyway I think it's impossible due to the fact that for sure one of the parts of healing is dumping this site completely. Sad :(

yeah, ive loss friends to suicide and it hurts alot, im just trying to say that there is something more, then just doom posting, we should be there for each other, and try to spread at least some kind of positivity, then the repeat that life is pain

 

[dinosavr]

yeah, ive loss friends to suicide and it hurts alot, im just trying to say that there is something more, then just doom posting, we should be there for each other, and try to spread at least some kind of positivity, then the repeat that life is pain

It's difficult though. We're just a bunch of people who actually see no point in existing so what's left for us is to accept it and it feels good to know that there are other people out there who think the same

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

well don't forget there is a recovery section. About everything else, I dunno. It's complicated Everyone has a different way of handling with life. I don't think people are trying to fit in. Me myself I'm just venting.

 

[MrDarkness]

well don't forget there is a recovery section. About everything else, I dunno. It's complicated Everyone has a different way of handling with life. I don't think people are trying to fit in. Me myself I'm just venting.

true, but people dont come here to recover, i just think, that being told constantly that life is shit and has no purpose, just makes the pain worse

 

[Blurry_Buildings]

This is probably due to the constant doom posting of the exact same copy and paste, that life is a prison. Life has no purpose. Nothing matters. Nothing changes. I think these views are extremely sheltered and immature, and really shows that some people don't have a grasp of the world. During my time on the site I'm seeing more and more threads of the repeated topic. And the massive increase of nihilism

I think I would be tempted to say that calling someone else's subjective view of their own life "sheltered" or "immature" without knowing anything about them is a sheltered or flawed way of thinking.

In my opinion it is up to the person experiencing their own life to make the judgement of what purpose, if any, their life has. It isn't anyone else's place to pass judgement on them for that, especially when no one will ever know exactly what living as them is like.

I agree with you that the recovery section is underutilized. I suspect many people here only use the site for discussions on suicide and then talk on social media, discord, reddit, or real life about recovery related things, where there are more people and an easier and more developed inteface to use.

 

[R_N]

Portraying others as ignorant while showing average ignorant views. You are completely unaware of the world as a whole and what living organisms go through. Talking about "sheltered".

World is beautiful only based on individuals current feelings. It doesn't change the fact that some animal is being eaten alive rn or someone is being born with debilitating disease. And don't forget that everyone decays, get sick or die some other way eventually. Even if they find life pleasurable they will suffer unless they are killed by some miracle stray bullet or something similar.

What did you expect on suicide forum if not nihilism? If anything we have too many threads where people are still bothered by traditional constructs.

You just want your own version of an echo chamber.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

As was mentioned before the people who gather here are not representative for the majority of people out there. I would say most people are already too broken when they start searching for methods (and maybe for a forum/community like SaSu). What to expect then? A majority saying "oh there's still hope" - "this and that helped me" - ... - I don't think for a majority of us here anything helped to make us feel better.

There's a recovery section, it's not as active as the suicide section but I think that's clear, taking into account, that the majority of people who register here have given up already.

 

[AInilam]

So what you're basically saying is ''it bothers me that people on a suicide forum struggle to find a reason or will to live and vent about it''? I don't think this site is for you if that's the only conclusion you're drawing from this. Every other post is either someone checking out of this life, asking about methods or venting about how horrible their life has been to have brought them to this point. They're not ''sheltered'', they're hurting. Jesus Christ. Sure some posts may come off as angsty or immature--but the purpose of this site is to allow people to vent without the fear of being judged or locked up in a nuthouse. I genuinely don't know what you were expecting.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

true, but people dont come here to recover, i just think, that being told constantly that life is shit and has no purpose, just makes the pain worse

Well that is really good point what you mention here. But when someone has no positive experiences with anything and everything they touch and try fails over many years, then it's very hard to think positive.

A friend always tells me "to think positive" when I always see negative things in everything and I say that's not gonna work before I even looked at it. Well, yeah ... failures after failures ... how to think "positive" here? That would need such a big positive emotion and not only a positive emotion, life would have to change in such a positive way to get out of such a low point in life. The positive experience must continue over a long period of time. That's is very hard and only very few people might have the ability to get out of this.

Once people are trapped in negative thoughts (due to their circumstances) they get kinda "hard-coded" into our brains, like things we once learn and never forget them again bc we repeat them permanently. After a certain point is reached it is almost impossible to rewrite the negative code with positive code. There's no Format:Brain button.

 

[MrDarkness]

Portraying others as ignorant while showing average ignorant views. You are completely unaware of the world as a whole and what living organisms go through. Talking about "sheltered".

World is beautiful only based on individuals current feelings. It doesn't change the fact that some animal is being eaten alive rn or someone is being born with debilitating disease. And don't forget that everyone decays, get sick or die some other way eventually. Even if they find life pleasurable they will suffer unless they are killed by some miracle stray bullet or something similar.

What did you expect on suicide forum if not nihilism? If anything we have too many threads where people are still bothered by traditional constructs.

You just want your own version of an echo chamber.

plenty of people go through hardship and don't resort to doom posting, they use that energy for something else, you want to be in a doom posting echo chamber where recovery is often disregarded and frowned upon be my guest. also the fact that you use

someone is being born with debilitating disease

plenty of people live healthy lives, and focus on other things, then whats holding them back. im saying that its easier to focus on negatives then positives

So what you're basically saying is ''it bothers me that people on a suicide forum don't have a will or reason to live''? I don't think this site is for you if that's the only conclusion you're drawing from this. Every other post is either someone checking out of this life, asking about methods or venting about how horrible life has been for them to have brought them to this point. They're not ''sheltered'', they're hurting. Jesus Christ. Sure some posts may come off as angsty or immature--but the purpose of this site is to allow people to vent without the fear of being locked up in a nuthouse. I genuinely don't know what you were expecting.

people are allowed to express their pain, i have no issue, i have an issue with the belief that help/recovery, or even joy, is bad or that its impossible, everyone works different, but others shouldnt disregard that help and happiness can happen, im depressed and plan on dying soon, ik if can change if want to

 

[tsykoais]

i didnt have friends, until i went on the site, i feel that some people here are not going to ctb in the end, and are here to express their troubles and find those who can relate

yeah but that's not my point, some people don't go on this site to make friends and in your case sometimes they do and they find those people which is great. and of course not everyone on here's gonna commit suicide which is why theres multiple sections on this forum with one literally dedicated to recovering. also to assume that everyone in general has people that are there and care for them is a bit naive no offense though.

 

[AInilam]

plenty of people go through hardship and don't resort to doom posting, they use that energy for something else, you want to be in a doom posting echo chamber where recovery is often disregarded and frowned upon be my guest. also the fact that you use

plenty of people live healthy lives, and focus on other things, then whats holding them back. im saying that its easier to focus on negatives then positives

people are allowed to express their pain, i have no issue, i have an issue with the belief that help/recovery, or even joy, is bad or that its impossible, everyone works different, but others shouldnt disregard that help and happiness can happen, im depressed and plan on dying soon, ik if can change if want to

There's a recovery forum for a reason.

Not everyone feels or thinks like you, I'm glad you feel like you can overcome whatever demons lead you here--but that isn't the case for everyone else. Have you seen the amount of Goodbye threads? How tone deaf can you be?

I don't understand how you expect people to be positive on a suicide forum--there are so many spaces that meet the criteria you're looking for, this isn't it. I get it, after awhile of reading vents about self-loathing, doom and gloom, it can bum you out. It's heartbreaking to read, especially since so many people here can be very kind, supportive and understanding. But this space is mostly for people who've reached the end of their rope and/or have tried every method to recover to no avail.

 

[MrDarkness]

There's a recovery forum for a reason.

Not everyone feels or thinks like you, I'm glad you feel like you can overcome whatever demons lead you here--but that isn't the case for everyone else here. Have you seen the amount of Goodbye threads? How tone deaf can you be?

I don't understand how you expect people to be positive on a suicide forum--there are so many spaces that meet the criteria you're looking for, this isn't it. I get it, after awhile of reading vents about self-loathing, doom and gloom, it can bum you out. But this space is mostly for people who've reached the end of their rope and/or have tried every method to recover to no avail.

tone deaf lmao, ive lost friends to suicide, but to use the excuse "amount of Goodbye threads" is just insulting the dead. also i just wanna state, not everyone has given help a chance or therapy, so to use the excuse that "most people here have made up their mind" isnt true in most cases

yeah but that's not my point, some people don't go on this site to make friends and in your case sometimes they do and they find those people which is great. and of course not everyone on here's gonna commit suicide which is why theres multiple sections on this forum with one literally dedicated to recovering. also to assume that everyone in general has people that are there and care for them is a bit naive no offense though.

feel free to disagree, some dont come here to find friends, but they do anyway

 

[Deleted member 65988]

i have an issue with the belief that help/recovery, or even joy, is bad or that its impossible, everyone works different, but others shouldnt disregard that help and happiness can happen, im depressed and plan on dying soon, ik if can change if want to

Could you quote examples of what exactly is said that you've seen consistently enough to raise it as an issue. I don't think recovery is impossible, really just depends how the individual sees it as an option for themselves to pursue, if they want to. I don't know about the joy part being bad though or what's been specifically said about it that's bad.

 

[AInilam]

tone deaf lmao, ive lost friends to suicide, but to use the excuse "amount of Goodbye threads" is just insulting the dead. also i just wanna state, not everyone has given help a chance or therapy, so to use the excuse that "most people here have made up their mind" isnt true in most cases

feel free to disagree, some dont come here to find friends, but they do anyway

That just makes it even worse, so you know people who've succumbed to ideations and yet you still can't understand why some people here find it difficult to be positive? I've lost someone as well, I've tried to talk them down but failed miserably because I couldn't even begin to comprehend the pain they were going through. Never in a million years would I have thought to say something like this to them, that they're attention seeking, doing it to fit in, sheltered or immature. And btw if a positive and accepting space was what you were going for, I'm sorry but this post wasn't the way to go about it. If anything it just makes people feel even more invalidated, alone, misunderstood or like they now have something to prove. Congrats.

 

[MrDarkness]

Could you quote examples of what exactly is said that you've seen consistently enough to raise it as an issue. I don't think recovery is impossible, really just depends how the individual sees it as an option for themselves to pursue, if they want to. I don't know about the joy part hejng bad though.

i cant remember word for word, and im not feeling like going through old threads. if you wanna think im lying, its fine

That just makes it even worse, so you know people who've succumbed to ideations, depression, loneliness, etc and yet you still can't understand why some people here find it difficult to be positive? I've lost someone as well, I tried to talk them down from it but failed miserably because I couldn't even begin to comprehend the pain they were going through. And btw posts like this--isn't the way to go about it, if a positive and accepting space was what you were going for, I'm sorry but this post isn't it. If anything it just makes people feel even more invalidated or like they have something to prove. Congrats.

what a way to shit on the dead, people die for different reasons, the friends ive lost had beliefs that the doom posting doesnt help, if you think im full of shit go for it, im not gonna argue with some, that just saying that im villian here, using my dead friends as an excuse to invalidate people

 

[Deleted member 65988]

if you wanna think im lying, its fine

Way to be defensive about it, never once did it even occur to me to even think you were lying either because clearly if this was enough of an issue for you to vent about it then some examples would at least come to mind from memory. All I asked was for examples, not even word for word necessarily.

 

[AnxietyHangover]

This forum is a safe space for people to vent and express their feelings without being judged or thrown into the looney bin. If you look at the URL of the page you will notice the word "suicide", so this isn't a happy place at all. Nor does it try to be. "Doom posting" is a thing in this section because people usually come here when they reached their rock bottom. I haven't heard of a person being at their lowest and also being all jolly and merry. Makes sense, right?
The people who "bothered to see any improvement" are in the recovery section of this forum. They aren't too many and for a reason.

I hope we can debate this topic in a civil manner, please, without accusing anybody of anything and without being aggressive. Thanks.

 

[PrisonPlanetBreak]

not everyone has given help a chance or therapy

Not everyone wants to give it a chance. I have all the means, therapy for me wouldn't be expensive. I could just pretend to go to therapy, not put in any work, and not care about that money I throw in. Do you think that everyone should give it a chance, even if they don't want to?​

 

[Praestat_Mori]

also i just wanna state, not everyone has given help a chance or therapy

Maybe this is not available to everyone? (There're many reasons: financial, no health insurance, terrible health system, family not supporting recovery attempts of their children ...) I can think of many other reasons why someone can give help a chance. This is certainly a minority compared to the whole population of a country and a minority from this minority fins their way to SaSu.

 

[MrDarkness]

Not everyone wants to give it a chance. I have all the means, therapy for me wouldn't be expensive. I could just pretend to go to therapy, not put in any work, and not care about that money I throw in. Do you think that everyone should give it a chance, even if they don't want to?​

i mean im not giving it a full chance, but im saying the constant doom posting, isnt helping anyone

Maybe this is not available to everyone? (There're many reasons: financial, no health insurance, terrible health system, family not supporting recovery attempts of their children ...) I can think of many other reasons why someone can give help a chance. This is certainly a minority compared to the whole population of a country and a minority from this minority fins their way to SaSu.

therapy is up to the person, but i dont agree with the fact, that shitting on it and shitting on people who use it, and saying its shit no matter what. is helping anyone here

This forum is a safe space for people to vent and express their feelings without being judged or thrown into the looney bin. If you look at the URL of the page you will notice the word "suicide", so this isn't a happy place at all. Nor does it try to be. "Doom posting" is a thing in this section because people usually come here when they reached their rock bottom. I haven't heard of a person being at their lowest and also being all jolly and merry. Makes sense, right?
The people who "bothered to see any improvement" are in the recovery section of this forum. They aren't too many and for a reason.

I hope we can debate this topic in a civil manner, please, without accusing anybody of anything and without being aggressive. Thanks.

yes i agree, everyone is allowed to have different beliefs, im just saying how i see it, someone can see it differently, maybe i want ctb in the end, no one knows the future, maybe a majority of people on the site will recover. we dont know

 

[AnxietyHangover]

but im saying the constant doom posting, isnt helping anyone

Alright, so what kind of posts do you expect in the "Suicide Discussion" section of this forum? Give me examples.

 

[MrDarkness]

Way to be defensive about it, never once did it even occur to me to even think you were lying either because clearly if this was enough of an issue for you to vent about it then some examples would at least come to mind from memory. All I asked was for examples, not even word for word necessarily.

mb mb, i can recall some saying that therapy just hasnt worked and they dont recommend it, mainly using that if it doesnt work for them it, it doesn't work for others, the same can be said about religion but thats another can of worms

Alright, so what kind of posts do you expect in the "Suicide Discussion" section of this forum? Give me examples.

daily struggles, venting, what lead them to the way they are. not the same post saying that life doesnt matter, that its a prison, etc etc. i swear some posts are just copied and pasted. Mainly the nihilism posts, but this usually spills into other threads, such as the venin pro death discussion

 

[nembutal]

i get wym, i think a lot of people wouldn't need this site if they just had a little more gratitude for their lives and didn't shroud their worldview in pessimism. but that's why people kill themselves, they don't accept help and they don't want to change, and it's easier to think you're the victim of some universal unfairness instead of picking yourself up and trying to change your life. it's easier to pity yourself than to change your ways.

 

[MrDarkness]

i get wym, i think a lot of people wouldn't need this site if they just had a little more gratitude for their lives and didn't shroud their worldview in pessimism. but that's why people kill themselves, they don't accept help and they don't want to change, and it's easier to think you're the victim of some universal unfairness instead of picking yourself up and trying to change your life. it's easier to pity yourself than to change your ways.

you couldn't have said it better, im just saying that doom posting should be changed with making others happy and comfort those who about to attempt, then the looming dread yk

 

[Praestat_Mori]

therapy is up to the person, but i dont agree with the fact, that shitting on it and shitting on people who use it, and saying its shit no matter what. is helping anyone here

I agree. Nobody should stop anyone from trying therapy, meds or other ways if they want to recover.

But again: a lot of people here might have had terrible experience with therapy, meds (some also suffer permanent brain damage from meds): Do you think those people will really speak positively about it in the suicide section?