Hi, new member, occasional lurker.
I have screwed up my life beyond repair. I had a happy home life with my family but betrayed them and wrecked everything. I can't bear to go on or face how awful my behavior will likely become if I survive. I have worked out a plan and wanted to run it by folks here:
Any holes (pun intended) in my plan I haven't thought of?
I have screwed up my life beyond repair. I had a happy home life with my family but betrayed them and wrecked everything. I can't bear to go on or face how awful my behavior will likely become if I survive. I have worked out a plan and wanted to run it by folks here:
- Pretend to go to work but go to Sportsman's Warehouse (using a gun because it's by far the most effective method. Considered SN or CO/charcoal but I'm put off by the low effectiveness rates, slowness, and complexity).
- Buy a Taurus GX2 9mm luger handgun and hollow point ammo (the gun is affordable compared to more powerful calibers and from my research on here should be sufficient. I'm trying to save as much money as possible for my family. Not interested in a pawn shop gun that might have flaws and prefer a brand new gun).
- Wait three-day waiting period to obtain gun, try to maintain predictable behavior, going to work etc.
- After waiting period is over, pretend to go to work but instead go to store and pick up gun, then go to liquor store and buy a bottle of vodka (maybe a less hard alcohol to prevent impairment that would mess up any of the precision of the rest of the plan?)
- Drop car off at home, walk to public transit.
- Take transit to relatively isolated station surrounded by tree groves (already selected, scoped out on Google Maps but not visited in person. Point is to go somewhere where I won't be bothered, am less likely to be discovered by innocent strangers, where nobody will need to drive my car home, where few people in my family often drive past, and where I won't leave a mess in an indoor place that needs to be disinfected).
- Find isolated spot in trees (only hangup: what if the spot I picked is already occupied by homeless people, which isn't uncommon around here? What if police are already posted at station and contact me when I try to slip off into the trees?)
- Unpack gun from box and load ammunition (only concern here is that I will never have handled or fired this gun before. This part needs to go seamlessly. I have handled and fired semiautomatic handguns in the past but have never owned one).
- Email time-delayed scheduled note to significant other with explanation and goodbyes, with life insurance info attached (note: I have life insurance through my job. I checked, there is a suicide clause but it expires after two years, which I am well past).
- Set up time-delay text to 911 telling them my name and location.
- Load gun, chug some vodka, aim into mouth pointed in line with my ear, and pull trigger.
Any holes (pun intended) in my plan I haven't thought of?
