Method Trying to work out a plan

[DangerRanger]

I've been wanting to ctb for almost two decades now. Recently things have gotten significantly worse. The deaths of my dogs back to back, the death of a dear friend that I wasn't even made aware of, and then finding out my job is getting cut soon. I've fought for years and years, and I just don't think I can do this much more. I'm constantly either numb or pissed off to the point I wanna get violent. I don't care about eating or sleeping or any variety of taking care of myself anymore. I've considered SN, but know what the acronyms for all the sites are. I've started looking at using an exit bag and helium because it's a lot easier to get. There's also the fact that my husband will be the one that finds me, so I want something that won't be too hard on him. Any advice or insight?

 

[Pale_Rider]

I can emphasize. Sad at my own brokenness. Pissed at a lot of the things I have seen, and experienced. Yeah I can distract myself, and even feel better for a time. The downward cycle will return, and yes it's a fight for the upward cycle with little to no help, or sympathy in the world.

 

[darksouls]

I've been wanting to ctb for almost two decades now. Recently things have gotten significantly worse. The deaths of my dogs back to back, the death of a dear friend that I wasn't even made aware of, and then finding out my job is getting cut soon. I've fought for years and years, and I just don't think I can do this much more. I'm constantly either numb or pissed off to the point I wanna get violent. I don't care about eating or sleeping or any variety of taking care of myself anymore. I've considered SN, but know what the acronyms for all the sites are. I've started looking at using an exit bag and helium because it's a lot easier to get. There's also the fact that my husband will be the one that finds me, so I want something that won't be too hard on him. Any advice or insight?

I want to ctb in nature
in a wood or so
far away from civilisation
so no one will find my corpse
it will be eaten by animals

 

[lifeisadream]

Gosh, even just one of those in isolation is hard enough to get through let alone having to cope with them in a short space of time. I'm so sorry for all that has happened & for the loss of your dogs.

There are some very helpful method resources available on here. Sadly peaceful methods such as N have become out of reach now. Sorry, wish could provide greater wisdom for you.

 

[FuneralCry]

It sounds like you've suffered so much, it's just so cruel to me how there's all this suffering in existing, I wish you the best, I hope you find the relief you search for.