7FDL16
Nothing gets better
- Mar 7, 2026
- 5
I desperately want to ctb. It has consumed my thoughts for weeks now. But my parents and sister and best friend are all very important to me and I love them and I can't just leave them behind like that.
I don't get lonely, I don't miss people, I don't want to interact with anyone. I wish everyone would leave me alone or forget about me so I can finally do it without guilt.
I'll never forget the way my dad squeezed my hand when he saw my wrists for the first time. I can still hear my mom crying, asking why I'm hurting myself, and I couldn't bear to tell her the truth. I hate this. I hate being alive. I have such a good life, so why am I not happy?
The one thing I truly want is the one thing I'll never be able to do. I'm not strong enough to hurt my loved ones again.
I don't get lonely, I don't miss people, I don't want to interact with anyone. I wish everyone would leave me alone or forget about me so I can finally do it without guilt.
I'll never forget the way my dad squeezed my hand when he saw my wrists for the first time. I can still hear my mom crying, asking why I'm hurting myself, and I couldn't bear to tell her the truth. I hate this. I hate being alive. I have such a good life, so why am I not happy?
The one thing I truly want is the one thing I'll never be able to do. I'm not strong enough to hurt my loved ones again.