I like this idea but in the case of inceldom/ femceldom- how?
Maybe by not rejecting them in a cruel way but, sometimes I've seen women reject in a manner that is kind. Which guys weirdly see as a signal to pursue even more/ aggressively. Maybe because they in turn have been taught to do that.
Educate men and women to look beyond good looks and wealth maybe? Can we do that though? We're still likely to have preferences to some extent.
Should people be more generous/ charitable? Give them a chance? I'm including me in that category- I'm ugly enough to be a charity case! Would a pity date be all that satisfying? Would the relationship likely last? We can't make people feel what they don't.
It's hard to know what to say that will be of comfort really. Other than to try and keep meeting people in the hopes that someone will be a good match. But- 'Don't worry about it- it will happen' is a lie- in so much as nothing is guaranteed. 'Don't worry about it- it isn't important'- is kind of dismissive. Plus- it will remain important to them, most likely.
One thing I would like them to take on board is that we are all influenced by our biology, culture, society, family. We all have needs of our own. We all have preferences- them as much as women. I wish they'd see the hypocricy of basically saying women are too picky. In my experience- both genders are.
Why wouldn't we all be though? It's a massive decision to invite someone into your life. Surely, it's better to be picky, rather than settle for less and become unhappy and resentful. Plus, why even think a pity vote would be satisfying?
Ok- so we may not have the attribute for good looks. But, I get frustrated when that is used as a ticket for everything else. I can't get a job because I'm unattractive. I doubt that's true. I've even heard employers say they don't like employing attractive men because, they are too distracting for the women!
I suppose because I struggle with confidence- I could totally understand why men weren't attractive to me. Of course it annoyed me that I didn't naturally comply to their preferences. I didn't like their preferences either. I've never liked feminine things. But still- I didn't expect them to like me despite all that. Sometimes I wonder if that's to do with upbringing though. Do we teach men to be more entitled?
If you were unloved simply for existing while ugly, you'd be hateful too.
It has nothing to do with being taught entitlement, love and affection is high up on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.
You weren't unloved because you were born hideous and ugly, you are admitting you just had high standards for men, and low standards for yourself.
That's not really fair to compare yourself to incels, who try as they might to look their best, are still too ugly for women, because women rate most men unattractive, let alone actual honest-to-god uggos like us incels. Unless I suddenly become rich enough for plastic surgery (or just rich enough for women to like me because as we all know, if I were rich, I wouldn't be an incel) I'm stuck the way I am. You put on some makeup, start acting more feminine, and suddenly, every guy you wanted, likes you. Hell, you didn't even need that, you can message any incel on the planet and get some love and affection right there. If I were to try to message a so-called "femcel" (an oxymoronic term) I get turned down in a heartbeat.
I resent the "Yass queen speak your truth" back patting, because when women do complain about men, they are reaffirmed by the same dweebs who tell me to stop acting so entitled.
It's easy to tell someone who cannot be loved that they should just stop wanting to be loved, and that they're not entitled to be loved, when you are someone who has experienced it, currently experiences it, and can experience it more whenever you want.
even though this post is a little old i really feel the need to comment on this.. you couldnt have said it better about those kinds of guys LOL
its embarrassing to admit but unfortunately just until recently people like that used to be the only other people i communicated with.. a lot of my boyfriends friends are all incels. one of them literally has an entire instagram acc JUST for posting things about women, varying from killing them to violating them and women he finds attractive which is ironic really.. they claim to hate women so much yet have a raging porn addiction.. do you REALLY hate women now lol or are you just mad you cant get one of your own. because they view women as objects and a fantasy that should be exactly the way they want. back to the "friend", he used to tell me a lot that i ""was one of the good ones"" and he was glad my boyfriend got a "good foid"(skull emoji 10000 billion times) which makes me sick because the pressure of having to overthink every single thing you do just so they wont hate you is excruciating... i dont know why i even talked to these people sometimes.. my boyfriend wanted me to have some kind of social life outside of him so he wanted me to talk to his friends.
what im trying to get at (sorry i ramble a lot) was a couple weeks ago, that friend posts a story on how some new mother killed her own child. naturally i responded saying how sad and messed up that was.. i wish to be a mother one day so that broke my heart.. and this man really replied with "please dont ever kill your own baby either" . it didnt hit me until a week ago maybe how fucked up that really was to say to me. what the hell have i ever done to make anyone think id kill my OWN child??? why would he feel the need to even have to tell me that?? just because im a woman?? after he even said stupid shit like im a ""good one""?? even though we had normal conversations before like normal people did is that how he saw me the entire time? i felt so stupid for not realizing they really do hate every single woman. it doesn't matter if ive done nothing wrong by their fucked up standards of what a woman should be, it doesnt matter if i am their own close friends girlfriend, i am just another woman to them that they hate. i never did anything wrong(by their standards)... i just dont get it.. i dont know why i didn't think that kind of stuff about me either.. i hate these people with such a passion they really will NEVER deserve a woman to care for them.
as a woman it literally doesnt matter what you do. you could fit all the standards of how women should be, be as beautiful as anything, and theyre still going to hate you. they don't see you as a person, just an object. it makes me sick that they probably see me as an object for my boyfriend when he's never treated me like that... god i hope he ditches those stupid friends.. i hate them so much every time he mentions them i just want to tell him he shouldn't talk to them anymore.. but i know thatd be wrong..
Lol, you're only proving the incels right, you know?
He keeps around that kind of company, but you don't care, because he's an attractive guy.
If he weren't attractive, that'd be a deal breaker. Er, I guess more accurately, him being unattractive would be the deal breaker.
And yet you wonder why incels hate women. Lol. Lmao, even.