Venting Told my friend something in confidence and she went behind my back

[bpdiskillingme]

I haven't been doing the best, I'm at such a low I feel like if I had the resources I'd be dead.

I vented to my friend regarding some feelings I had for one of my friends and calling myself crazy for being so delusional and thinking about other people already.

She told him, I mean I had already told him how I felt the same day i told her but it still sucks I get a message him from being like "it's funny u told x u have a thing for me" like it sent me into paranoia mode even though he knows already

I only told her. I feel like I can't trust anyone and I'm such an open book I need to close myself off

She's my best friend like best best. It hurts even though it's so pathetic it hurts so bad

I don't think I can carry on much longer like this.

 

[wagner2029]

Dealing with rejection is always difficult, I believe your friend wanted to help, there is nothing wrong with someone knowing that you like them.
If he doesn't want it, there are those who want it.

 

[RemainingDubious]

I haven't been doing the best, I'm at such a low I feel like if I had the resources I'd be dead.

Sorry to hear you friend broke your trust and you haven't been your best.

I vented to my friend regarding some feelings I had for one of my friends and calling myself crazy for being so delusional and thinking about other people already.

If you could have the resources you that give you your ideal death or have that guy feel the same way about you what would you prefer?

i only ask since it sounds like you wanted a future.

She told him, I mean I had already told him how I felt the same day i told her but it still sucks I get a message him from being like "it's funny u told x u have a thing for me" like it sent me into paranoia mode even though he knows already

Have you asked why she told him? She might of genuinely believed she was doing you a favour. It might be helpful to try to understand her intent.

Why does he find it amusing? That sounds rather insensitive finding your feelings amusing.

I'm such an open book I need to close myself off

i completely understand that feeling. i'm like that. Being an open book isn't a bad thing. The bad thing is most people take the piss. That says more about him than you. Why should you change, especially for the sake of others.