TIME IS UP

[StarryStarry]

I'm back again. I haven't posted because I haven't had the internet. Not that anyone really gives a shit. Yes, I am having a pity party. If anyone has followed my threads, you know what my life has been like. So I moved across the country for a job. Gave up everything I own, sold some things to someone who totally took advantage of the situation (who I trusted). Got a credit card (that's the only way I could have moved as I was down to almost nothing on my savings). The asshole attorney I last worked for (not the one who curses) I only worked for this one for five weeks. He had me listed and paid me as a contractor and never bothered to tell me. Now I owe the IRS and when I finally received the 1099 he put down that he paid me almost $500 more than what he actually did. Which means I would have to pay the IRS more money (which I don't have). Nothing has gone right since I moved here. I work for a female hitler. I'm more alone than ever. The only good thing is that I live in an old person's apt building and when they die the others take their pets in. So Sweet Pea will have a home. I am calling this crappy ass life done. I'm at my end. I can't do anymore. There is something wrong with me that I can't be happy that all of these shitty things happen to me. I'm waiting until I get my paycheck so I can leave next THursday. I'll get my check and walk out. I'm so tired of trying I can't even tell you. I'm 60 years old ... I should never have lived this long. I'm looking forward to driving to where my little girl is. I'm looking forward to being with her soon. Thanks for listening - whether you care or not.

 

[VoidDesirer22]

I'm back again. I haven't posted because I haven't had the internet. Not that anyone really gives a shit. Yes, I am having a pity party. If anyone has followed my threads, you know what my life has been like. So I moved across the country for a job. Gave up everything I own, sold some things to someone who totally took advantage of the situation (who I trusted). Got a credit card (that's the only way I could have moved as I was down to almost nothing on my savings). The asshole attorney I last worked for (not the one who curses) I only worked for this one for five weeks. He had me listed and paid me as a contractor and never bothered to tell me. Now I owe the IRS and when I finally received the 1099 he put down that he paid me almost $500 more than what he actually did. Which means I would have to pay the IRS more money (which I don't have). Nothing has gone right since I moved here. I work for a female hitler. I'm more alone than ever. The only good thing is that I live in an old person's apt building and when they die the others take their pets in. So Sweet Pea will have a home. I am calling this crappy ass life done. I'm at my end. I can't do anymore. There is something wrong with me that I can't be happy that all of these shitty things happen to me. I'm waiting until I get my paycheck so I can leave next THursday. I'll get my check and walk out. I'm so tired of trying I can't even tell you. I'm 60 years old ... I should never have lived this long. I'm looking forward to driving to where my little girl is. I'm looking forward to being with her soon. Thanks for listening - whether you care or not.

I care and have followed some of your threads when I could catch them.

I hope your chosen method brings you peace if that is what you desire.

 

[rationaltake]

I've been following your posts. I understand despair. So sorry. I know how worried you've been about Sweet Pea. Life can be so hard for some of us.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that things are so hopeless. It sounds like you have been through a lot, and I understand that it can be hard to carry on when you are suffering so much. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[AnestheticVoid]

I believe you deserve peace.

 

[Hydrangea]

Wishing you peace.

 

[anxious_depressive]

I care.

I was worried about you, Starry.
And about Sweet pea.

Life is an incredibly cruel thing.I am very sorry that everything is happening like this.

Sending you a lot of hugs.

 

[freedompass]

It's hard to think what to say but I have followed your threads too, I could relate as another 60 year old lone female. You and Sweet Pea have definitely touched some hearts here! I do wish something could just go right for you at this point. Whatever happens I wish you peace.

 

[CommitSudoku]

Good on you for trying the job, I'm sorry it's worked out how it has and you've been taken advantage of so often. I'm glad your living space sounds decent though and it's great you've found a safe space for Sweet Pea. I enjoy reading your posts and when we've got to talk a bit. I wish you the best with whatever you decide to choose, and hope you can find the peace you deserve.

 

[Chiisai]

Ive read your threads for quite some time and know that youve always cared for your cat. Whatever decision you make, I hope you will finally find the peace you need most.

 

[Julgran]

I'm back again. I haven't posted because I haven't had the internet. Not that anyone really gives a shit. Yes, I am having a pity party. If anyone has followed my threads, you know what my life has been like. So I moved across the country for a job. Gave up everything I own, sold some things to someone who totally took advantage of the situation (who I trusted). Got a credit card (that's the only way I could have moved as I was down to almost nothing on my savings). The asshole attorney I last worked for (not the one who curses) I only worked for this one for five weeks. He had me listed and paid me as a contractor and never bothered to tell me. Now I owe the IRS and when I finally received the 1099 he put down that he paid me almost $500 more than what he actually did. Which means I would have to pay the IRS more money (which I don't have). Nothing has gone right since I moved here. I work for a female hitler. I'm more alone than ever. The only good thing is that I live in an old person's apt building and when they die the others take their pets in. So Sweet Pea will have a home. I am calling this crappy ass life done. I'm at my end. I can't do anymore. There is something wrong with me that I can't be happy that all of these shitty things happen to me. I'm waiting until I get my paycheck so I can leave next THursday. I'll get my check and walk out. I'm so tired of trying I can't even tell you. I'm 60 years old ... I should never have lived this long. I'm looking forward to driving to where my little girl is. I'm looking forward to being with her soon. Thanks for listening - whether you care or not.

You may feel weak right now, but remember that you tried and gave life - and your lovely cat - all you had to give. Now it's your turn to have it as you wish. Keep going strong in life or death.

 

[forgotten15]

I am sorry for your suffering. I understand you, I am at the end too, there is nothing left for me here. I hope I become nothing soon. I wish we will find our desired peace.

 

[StarryStarry]

I am sorry for your suffering. I understand you, I am at the end too, there is nothing left for me here. I hope I become nothing soon. I wish we will find our desired peace.

Life can be so horribly cruel. I find no peace here. ALthough I have said before my final days were coming and i may change my mind this time too, but I know in my heart that I will take my own life. I have misused my body for years in the hopes I would have a heart attack or some other disease with no luck. My friend, I wish you the peace you deserve that you were denied.

 

[UpandDownPrincess]

Oh, Starry. What can I say? I fear that this is it for you. Somehow your tone has changed, and you seem quite determined. I'm so glad you feel confident about leaving Sweet Pea.

I cannot ask you to stay here for us and I know you are longing for your daughter with all your heart.

I suppose I can only say thank you for being a part of our lives. You have given more than you gave, and you will be missed.

Of course, we are all here for you until you feel the time is right, whenever that is.

I wish you peace, now and forever.

Jennifer

 

[Of The Universe]

I'm sorry things went south for you. It seemed after you moved that things might get better.
That bullshit with the " contractor" designation,some lowdown bitch did that to my brother decades ago. He had to pay A good sum to the IRS. I only hope his boss died of ovarian cancer!
We all are rooting for you and Sweet Pea! You have someone who loves you,so that's A good thing.