lostforever77

lostforever77

Student
Dec 13, 2023
100
Hello Everyone,
I just wanted everyone to know what was going through my head right now, especially since everyone has been so good to me, and honestly has been a stand in for my family which physically is non existent. After since my wife of 16 years told me she wanted a divorce, I have been contemplating CTB. Buying supplies, going through the motions to make sure everything is just right, and of course writing last will and letters. Since she told me she was gong to file in January, and I do not want to face more holidays alone, this coming up weekend was my first real set of dates to go through with it. I honesty do not know what I a going to do. But I wanted all of you to know where I was emotionally and mentally. Love all of you.
 
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Soc

Soc

Member
Dec 9, 2023
72
I've been separated and went thru a divorce this year. Was pretty horrible and barely get to see my daughter at all now (nearly been a year) I was recovering but other things have happened that have tipped me over the edge and I feel there's not much to live for anymore. Just wanted to tell you so you know it's understandable. Wish you all the best with whatever choice you make. I can't do it yet as I am living with my parents waiting for a flat purchase. I don't want them to be broken by finding me dead in their own home.
 
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Tears in Rain

Tears in Rain

..............
Dec 12, 2023
858
Sorry about your shitty situation. Just make sure you are fully certain that the time is right for you to go. People in the past thought they were ready to ctb, but when the time came and s.i. hit them, they maybe weren't as ready to end things as they thought they were, and couldn't go through with it. Be sure it is your time, then facing down any s.i. that may or may not hit you will be easier.

Best of luck with whatever you decide.
 
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lostforever77

lostforever77

Student
Dec 13, 2023
100
Thank you. I really do hope the next life is better than this life. I can't live like this anymore.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,919
I wish you the best in what you decide.
 
B

baabbaabbaab

Student
Dec 12, 2023
196
Best of luck mate. I wish you well.
 
lostforever77

lostforever77

Student
Dec 13, 2023
100
Thank you, everyone. I love you all. Each and everyone of you is precious to me.
 
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S

SVEN

Enlightened
Apr 3, 2023
1,793
I'm sorry for your circumstances, best wishes for succeeding in whatever you decide.
 
huphup

huphup

Student
Dec 2, 2023
108
Wishing you peace and painlessness during this hard time and whatever you decide to do :)
 
lostforever77

lostforever77

Student
Dec 13, 2023
100
I've been separated and went thru a divorce this year. Was pretty horrible and barely get to see my daughter at all now (nearly been a year) I was recovering but other things have happened that have tipped me over the edge and I feel there's not much to live for anymore. Just wanted to tell you so you know it's understandable. Wish you all the best with whatever choice you make. I can't do it yet as I am living with my parents waiting for a flat purchase. I don't want them to be broken by finding me dead in their own home.
Thank you for sharing, it does help to know that I am not the only one going through this. Some times I think people think I am over blowing how this is effecting me. My marriage = the reason why I did everything else I did. I am pretty selfless so I do things for the benefits of thers, not myself, Honestly if it was just my self, I would probably take the path of the least resistance when it comes to work. Speaking of...your username "Soc"..I work out of the Soc (Security operations Center). Do you also report out of a SOC or is this a strange coincidence
 
Soc

Soc

Member
Dec 9, 2023
72
Soc is an animal in another language. I'll let you work out the rest. It links a little to me in RL.
 
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