melancholymallory03

melancholymallory03

Do cats live nine lives ? Or do humans ⏰
Feb 20, 2024
360
This shirt makes me wanna shut my eyes and disintegrate.
Wearing a shirt I found in my closet , it's an off white oversized shirt that was yours.
It smells just like you .
I wonder when the smell will go away.
I was crying all morning. I miss you, but I don't . I hate you , but I love you. We are not good for eachother but our story was real. I hate you at the same time so badly. Fuck you….. fuck you ……. But love you . 😞
I hope you know all day long I've been painting, smoking and smelling your shirt. It has blood, snot and tears on it and I can't even bring myself to wash it. I never will as gross as that seems. It's all I have left of you, and the bunny toy.
buy one day the smell of you will be gone. And so will I, and you will pop out three babies because I am not a conformist and I could never be , I bet you'd walk right past me if you saw me. I bet you'll forget all about me. I bet you are moving on like me. Some moments are harder than others. What have we done to eachother ? Why now, so many " four month relationships . So many people gone. Lost. Fuck it at this point it's better to be alone. Or with predictable people at least.
I hope you know it's not your fault when I ctb. I have always wanted my death to be my own choice since a young kid. After everything that's happened it's clear to me that is my fate. I wonder what yours is. Please forgive me for Ramadan , forgive me for the drugs. Forgive me for everything, after that night at the bar I was never the same. I just don't know what happened. I'm sorry I couldn't trust you after that.

I hope I can smell you forever. Our beings don't align but you are my friend forever.

You're rotten barbie ,
Goodbye.

I hope you find whatever you're looking for.☮️
 

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