Ε. Η. R.
Experienced
- Oct 5, 2023
- 266
The Year of the Dragon has arrived. I'm crying.
I was born in the year of the Dragon. And this new year was important for me. When I made mistakes back in August I knew that I would die in agony. Nevertheless, I wanted to kill myself before the new year so as not to embarrass myself before the Year of Dragon.
I hate myself very much. I hear fireworks outside the window. But I just can't afford to open the curtains and look. I am the shame of the year of the Dragon. I've made so many mistakes that I could have avoided. If only I had been more attentive, more careful, true to my essence and principles. I don't deserve to breathe. I don't deserve to live after all the mistakes I've made since 2018. And the same after August 2023. I had the last chance for revenge, the last chance to prove to myself that I can do a lot in this life.
I could earn huge money in russia. I had access to precursors in darket. I also know how to synthesize the most popular synthetic drugs in russia. And I wanted to do it. I wanted to prove to myself that I can achieve a lot in this life. To live at least a year as I want. Again take care of appearance, about myself, about nutrition. At least a little bit back to my old self. It's one thing to take revenge, live for yourself as you want about a year or two and die. It's another thing to die in tears, regrets, and having completely failed at everything. But, I'm an inattentive, uncareful, unlucky. Although, I tried to be careful and attentive. Not enough, judging by my current state.
I once loved myself, took care of myself. This was before 2018. Every year it gets worse. And now (from August 2023) the time has come when I can't say almost a single good word about myself. It looks like I will die in agony, regrets and the fact that I made a lot of mistakes, betrayed myself, and was unable to take revenge. I really don't deserve to live after everything.
I was born in the year of the Dragon. And this new year was important for me. When I made mistakes back in August I knew that I would die in agony. Nevertheless, I wanted to kill myself before the new year so as not to embarrass myself before the Year of Dragon.
I hate myself very much. I hear fireworks outside the window. But I just can't afford to open the curtains and look. I am the shame of the year of the Dragon. I've made so many mistakes that I could have avoided. If only I had been more attentive, more careful, true to my essence and principles. I don't deserve to breathe. I don't deserve to live after all the mistakes I've made since 2018. And the same after August 2023. I had the last chance for revenge, the last chance to prove to myself that I can do a lot in this life.
I could earn huge money in russia. I had access to precursors in darket. I also know how to synthesize the most popular synthetic drugs in russia. And I wanted to do it. I wanted to prove to myself that I can achieve a lot in this life. To live at least a year as I want. Again take care of appearance, about myself, about nutrition. At least a little bit back to my old self. It's one thing to take revenge, live for yourself as you want about a year or two and die. It's another thing to die in tears, regrets, and having completely failed at everything. But, I'm an inattentive, uncareful, unlucky. Although, I tried to be careful and attentive. Not enough, judging by my current state.
I once loved myself, took care of myself. This was before 2018. Every year it gets worse. And now (from August 2023) the time has come when I can't say almost a single good word about myself. It looks like I will die in agony, regrets and the fact that I made a lot of mistakes, betrayed myself, and was unable to take revenge. I really don't deserve to live after everything.
