Communicating with people is incredibly exhausting for me. It completely drains me because every idea in my head and every feeling I experience can only be expressed through a language that, with its words, carries an impact that varies in its effect on each listener. The tone of voice and delivery also play a role, making me feel like I'm mocking myself every time I speak. I'm fully aware that the other party has never truly understood me, and all they receive from the picture I paint with words is a distorted image filtered through their understanding and what they know. This often leads to misunderstandings or artificial behaviors, pretending to comprehend, just as a form of evasion.
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