The sadness of being single and virgin at 23

[FireFox]

I will be 24 next month and still be single. There is so much sadness in being single nobody ever talks about. If i am still single in my 30s and failed to create the life i have always wanted i will definitely kill myself. The older i get men will no longer find me attractive and society sees 30 as old in women.

When I was a teenager at school I was never the pretty girl at school the boys wanted and the girls wanted to be friends with. Most of the girls in the school had a boyfriend and had close friends throughout. .

I was just the weird kid who frequently got builled and not attractive as the others girls in the school.

All I ever wanted was a man who loved me for me. I give my love to men and they never return it. I ask guys out, I compliment them and take a genuine interest in thier lives but they never do the same for me and just reject me always. People have told me I should let guys chase me as that is the role of a man.

Being in virgin and single in your 20s is absolutely awful and extremely difficult to cope with because I have missed out on so much. The valentines flowers i never got to have, never being told i am beautiful by a man, never being called someone's girlfriend, never holding someone hand in public and never doing fun things couples do .

Everyone losess thier virginity in thier teens i feel like a freak for still being one. Adult virginity is mocked and rarely talked about. When I was a teenager I made of fun by other the teeange girls for being a virgin and people would look at me weirdly for being one.

Before covid19 I used to go the park and other places i would see couple holding hands and kissing all i am reminded of what i dont have in my life. It is constant reminder how i was never the pretty girl at school that the boys wanted and the rejection over the years i experienced from guys i liked.

I know it sounds pathetic this what being single for so long does it becomes unbearable. During the 3rd national lockdown in the UK there were stories about couples in the newspapers and magazines talking about thier sadness about not seeing thier partner because of lockdowns. These were same couples who mocked people like me and many others for being single, constantly flaunted thier relationships on social media and vlogs now they want to talk about loneliness . I hate them i really do

Men want the perfect attractive women. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and prefer doing fun activities which dont involve partying willl never be enough. We live in a shallow world which cares about looks and beauty. Sometimes i wish i had blonde hair and blue eyes men will find me attractive as this standard of beauty is promoted in society. I am a brown skinned woman with brown eyes i hate it because these features i find are dull.

Being single in my 20s has made be bitter and angry men never loved me back and envious of women who have boyfriends and husbands.

Men want the perfect attractive women like we see on Instagram, love island and celebrity culture. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and doing fun activities willl never be enough.

There so many reasons why i want kill myself.

Knowing everything I know now I would have killed myself 10 years ago.

 

[Futile]

For how much it may be worth, being a virgin as a woman is not nearly as bad as being a virgin for a man, in fact some poeple may even find it a good thing.

Personally I would prefer a virgin girl, but only because I'm a virgin myself

 

[orlandom]

I will be 24 next month and still be single. There is so much sadness in being single nobody ever talks about. If i am still single in my 30s and failed to create the life i have always wanted i will definitely kill myself. The older i get men will no longer find me attractive and society sees 30 as old in women.

When I was a teenager at school I was never the pretty girl at school the boys wanted and the girls wanted to be friends with. Most of the girls in the school had a boyfriend and had close friends throughout. .

I was just the weird kid who frequently got builled and not attractive as the others girls in the school.

All I ever wanted was a man who loved me for me. I give my love to men and they never return it. I ask guys out, I compliment them and take a genuine interest in thier lives but they never do the same for me and just reject me always. People have told me I should let guys chase me as that is the role of a man.

Being in virgin and single in your 20s is absolutely awful and extremely difficult to cope with because I have missed out on so much. The valentines flowers i never got to have, never being told i am beautiful by a man, never being called someone's girlfriend, never holding someone hand in public and never doing fun things couples do .

Everyone losess thier virginity in thier teens i feel like a freak for still being one. Adult virginity is mocked and rarely talked about. When I was a teenager I made of fun by other the teeange girls for being a virgin and people would look at me weirdly for being one.

Before covid19 I used to go the park and other places i would see couple holding hands and kissing all i am reminded of what i dont have in my life. It is constant reminder how i was never the pretty girl at school that the boys wanted and the rejection over the years i experienced from guys i liked.

I know it sounds pathetic this what being single for so long does it becomes unbearable. During the 3rd national lockdown in the UK there were stories about couples in the newspapers and magazines talking about thier sadness about not seeing thier partner because of lockdowns. These were same couples who mocked people like me and many others for being single, constantly flaunted thier relationships on social media and vlogs now they want to talk about loneliness . I hate them i really do

Men want the perfect attractive women. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and prefer doing fun activities which dont involve partying willl never be enough. We live in a shallow world which cares about looks and beauty. Sometimes i wish i had blonde hair and blue eyes men will find me attractive as this standard of beauty is promoted in society. I am a brown skinned woman with brown eyes i hate it because these features i find are dull.

Being single in my 20s has made be bitter and angry men never loved me back and envious of women who have boyfriends and husbands.

Men want the perfect attractive women like we see on Instagram, love island and celebrity culture. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and doing fun activities willl never be enough.

There so many reasons why i want kill myself.

Knowing everything I know now I would have killed myself 10 years ago.

I can feel your pain. I'm lonely. But I knew love. I don't know what hurts more, believe me.

But I can feel how lonely it hurts you.
If you could just take two lonely people and make them not lonely and happy.

I would also like to know again what love is. It is unbearable to be alone in this world. I'm tired.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

I can e-date you, if you want.

 

[WornOutLife]

Even though many men are the way you said, not all of us are like that.

Just keep on looking for them, the right person will show up.

I found true love when I was 27. Just an amazing girl who really understood the way I felt.

I wish you the best, dear.

Hugs!

 

[TooConscious]

Lassy men will be foaming at the mouth at your description regardless of your looks.
You could hire a male escort to save being fed some bullshit by a fake person just after your virginity and looking to hurt your feelings.

This world is too horrific to be worried about being a bloody virgin.

 

[Hatari]

I'm sorry you feel that way. I'm 47, haven't been a virgin in 30 years, but am in a relationship with someone who hasn't touched me in what is now the beginning of year 5 with no end in sight. I had planned on exiting but "life" keeps getting in the way. At the moment I am making sure one of my cats overcomes some ear and tooth infections so I leave him with my GF in good health before I go.

I haven't had sex in so long, for all I know I'm a "re-virgin." I say that with tongue planted firmly in cheek.

My advice, take it leave it? Try, and I mean try, not to think too much about it. Let it happen naturally. Be yourself, be true to yourself, and that man will find you.

 

[Last chance]

Im a man and I was a virgin until I was 23,since then I have had lots and lots of sex and relationships.

Give it time,you never know who youre going to meet. Be wary though because heartbreak is incredibly painful.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

Men want the perfect attractive women like we see on Instagram, love island and celebrity culture. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and doing fun activities willl never be enough.

Firstly this is an unfair generalization - this is not intended as an attack.

These people that you talk about might not necessarily be "beautiful" though, because each person has their own preferences. The models and such that you see on Instagram and in celebrity culture have make-up, Photoshop touch-ups, cosmetic surgery and so-on; not everyone finds fake tan and pencilled eyebrows attractive though. This is not to say that there is anything wrong with those two things either.

 

[lofticries]

Be glad you didn't lose your virginity in high school. High school boys are the worst when it comes to airing that shit out. Also a lot of mind games. And most relationships in highschool don't last. Only a few actually marry their high school sweet hearts.

btw,this is not me just shitting on high school boys, high school girls are just as immature not to mention catty af.

Please stop looking at instagram, twitter, and other social media sites to what a perfect couple looks like. Most of these couples only put what they want people to see and not the nitty gritty of their relationship. And although attraction does play a role in the dating area I don't think it plays much of a role to how a man will treat you in the end. Even the most gorgeous women get cheated on or treated like crap in general. Hollywood couples is a perfect example of that.

If you want to lose your virginity then that should be easy in todays hook up culture. However love I admit will be much harder. But that's true for almost everyone.

The view point that blues eyes, fair skin, and blond hair is superior to all other hair colors, skin colors, and eyes colors is so distorted. Beauty comes in all colors. It'd be boring af if everyone in the world looked like hitler's wet dream.

You're 23-24, that's still young by most ppls definition. A lot of women aren't getting married/having kids until 30 anyway since the economy is shit atm.

Anyone who shits on someone for being a virgin will always be pathetic in my eyes. Why should one care if someone is having sex or not. That just seems creepy and invasive.

 

[TooConscious]

I'm sorry you feel that way. I'm 47, haven't been a virgin in 30 years, but am in a relationship with someone who hasn't touched me in what is now the beginning of year 5 with no end in sight. I had planned on exiting but "life" keeps getting in the way. At the moment I am making sure one of my cats overcomes some ear and tooth infections so I leave him with my GF in good health before I go.

I haven't had sex in so long, for all I know I'm a "re-virgin." I say that with tongue planted firmly in cheek.

My advice, take it leave it? Try, and I mean try, not to think too much about it. Let it happen naturally. Be yourself, be true to yourself, and that man will find you.

I was just looking at new prostitutes to book since usual girl has changed career since covid, I've just come across one on her profile 'NO SEX, NO BJ, NO KISS! MASSAGE £140 PH'
I thought.... Sounds like a typical relationship lol

 

[Bergamot]

The sadness of losing everything and being nothing for anyone and too for gf and thinking ctb for love at 23​

I will be 24 next month and still be single. There is so much sadness in being single nobody ever talks about. If i am still single in my 30s and failed to create the life i have always wanted i will definitely kill myself. The older i get men will no longer find me attractive and society sees 30 as old in women.

When I was a teenager at school I was never the pretty girl at school the boys wanted and the girls wanted to be friends with. Most of the girls in the school had a boyfriend and had close friends throughout. .

I was just the weird kid who frequently got builled and not attractive as the others girls in the school.

All I ever wanted was a man who loved me for me. I give my love to men and they never return it. I ask guys out, I compliment them and take a genuine interest in thier lives but they never do the same for me and just reject me always. People have told me I should let guys chase me as that is the role of a man.

Being in virgin and single in your 20s is absolutely awful and extremely difficult to cope with because I have missed out on so much. The valentines flowers i never got to have, never being told i am beautiful by a man, never being called someone's girlfriend, never holding someone hand in public and never doing fun things couples do .

Everyone losess thier virginity in thier teens i feel like a freak for still being one. Adult virginity is mocked and rarely talked about. When I was a teenager I made of fun by other the teeange girls for being a virgin and people would look at me weirdly for being one.

Before covid19 I used to go the park and other places i would see couple holding hands and kissing all i am reminded of what i dont have in my life. It is constant reminder how i was never the pretty girl at school that the boys wanted and the rejection over the years i experienced from guys i liked.

I know it sounds pathetic this what being single for so long does it becomes unbearable. During the 3rd national lockdown in the UK there were stories about couples in the newspapers and magazines talking about thier sadness about not seeing thier partner because of lockdowns. These were same couples who mocked people like me and many others for being single, constantly flaunted thier relationships on social media and vlogs now they want to talk about loneliness . I hate them i really do

Men want the perfect attractive women. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and prefer doing fun activities which dont involve partying willl never be enough. We live in a shallow world which cares about looks and beauty. Sometimes i wish i had blonde hair and blue eyes men will find me attractive as this standard of beauty is promoted in society. I am a brown skinned woman with brown eyes i hate it because these features i find are dull.

Being single in my 20s has made be bitter and angry men never loved me back and envious of women who have boyfriends and husbands.

Men want the perfect attractive women like we see on Instagram, love island and celebrity culture. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and doing fun activities willl never be enough.

There so many reasons why i want kill myself.

Knowing everything I know now I would have killed myself 10 years ago.

​

 

[LunarPyotr]

For me it's not really important if someone calls herself ugly since it's mostly the other ways around. Due to the current generation ( I call them retardz), a women supposes to have a gigantic ass, big titties and should wear like expensive stuff (Gucci purse included).
I personally think that it's totally dumb to just want this if they would just use you and then just make some stupid argument which wouldn't make them look like they were just using that person to get as much money out of him as possible.
I personally did that mistake in my youth, I didn't lost my virginity because I didn't wanted to have sex so early on in the relationship.

When it comes to me, I wouldn't mid being with someone who doesn't fit the stereotypes..
You're "flat"?(I'm talking about chest)
You have a some fat on your body?
Scars from previous self harm sessions?
Maybe you appear masculine?
Trans?
In a wheelchair?
Or Maybe you're interested in video games or books?
For me this wouldn't really matter..
I care about the personality and not about how you look or what others think about you.
And we would live in my country, I would probably go on a date with you after a certain period of time of getting to know each other over this forum chat or some IM app like Telegram, Signal, Keybase or even Twitter DM.

Guess what, this might came wrong to you since English isn't my primary language but I'm also 23yo and even though I'm sad but also I'm happy that I didn't lost my virginity to those thots who cheated and left me.
You know why I'm happy about that?
Because I believe and hope that one day I'll meet the one woman who I'd be happy with and one day loose my virginity in bed with her. Even if this won't ever happen, then at least I tried and that's fine too.

And now don't get me wrong @FireFox, I know that it's really hard of being alone and I'm experiencing this too right now, sometimes even cry about this but I would consider you being lucky that you didn't loose your virginity after going in bed (or car) with some fuckboy who just wanted some one night stand and then wouldn't even pick up your calls.
Like I said before but now pointed towards you. Maybe you will find someone who'll accept you the way you are, despite your flaws and you two will have a happy life.

And to give my last cents to this comment.
I really hope you didn't misunderstood me and don't think of my comment here as some sort of an hate comment or anything like that.
It's just making me a bit of upset to read and hear about people who are treated because they have certain flaws.
There are definitely people out there like me, who don't follow that stupid ideology and would definitely choose someone like you, as their future wife and just ignore what others say because the happiness and the harmony between you two would be more important than some stupid strangers.

###
To all the others here. I just saying my honest opinion here. Maybe you have certain preferences in a woman and that's fine too. I don't judge you.

 

[StringPuppet]

You could be a late bloomer

 

[Yasuke]

Have you tried online dating?

 

[FireFox]

Even though many men are the way you said, not all of us are like that.

Just keep on looking for them, the right person will show up.

I found true love when I was 27. Just an amazing girl who really understood the way I felt.

I wish you the best, dear.

Hugs!

WornoutLife/ Matt ( if am allowed to use your name, you have used it on other threads. I won't use it again if you refuse me to ok )

I read other peoples threads just so I can know more about the people I talk to on the site . I like having the full picture of things that is my personality.

I mean every word i say

You are a very beautiful man both on the outside and inside too.

Your are such a wonderful, sweet and compassionate soul. I have found confort in the replies you have left in my other threads. I love it when you call me dear.

I am so sorry to hear about your torment and frequent suffering living with bipolar disorder which you have mentioned on the site .

Bipolar is a cruel mental illness which has brought nothing but suffering to those who live with it every day. Bipolar has taken so many beautiful souls from this world and have destroyed so many families in the process.

I don't not wish this illness on my worst enemy.

In the 21st century bipolar is still a very misunderstood mental illness in which sufferers experience prejudice and ignorance from society and sometimes even with thier own families and the people they love the most.

I dont suffer from bipolar disorder and all I can do is educate myself about the illness and others too.

Bipolar people need our love ,compassion and most of all patience.

Please take care of yourself and please keep safe.

Love
FireFox

Even though many men are the way you said, not all of us are like that.

Just keep on looking for them, the right person will show up.

I found true love when I was 27. Just an amazing girl who really understood the way I felt.

I wish you the best, dear.

Hugs!

WornoutLife/ Matt ( if am allowed to use your name, you have used it on other threads. I won't use it again if you refuse me to ok )

I read other peoples threads just so I can know more about the people I talk to on the site . I like having the full picture of things that is my personality.

I mean every word i say

You are a very beautiful man both pn

You could be a late bloomer

outside and inside too.

Your are such a wonderful, sweet and compassionate soul. I have found confort in the replies you have left in my other threads. I love it when you call me dear.

I am so sorry to hear about your torment and frequent suffering living with bipolar disorder which you have mentioned on the site .

Bipolar is a cruel mental illness which has brought nothing but suffering to those who live with it every day. Bipolar has taken so many beautiful souls from this world and have destroyed so many families in the process.

I don't not wish this illness on my worst enemy.

In the 21st century bipolar is still a very misunderstood mental illness in which sufferers experience prejudice and ignorance from society and sometimes even with thier own families and the people they love the most.

I dont suffer from bipolar disorder and all I can do is educate myself about the illness and others too.

Bipolar people need our love ,compassion and most of all patience.

Please take care of yourself and please keep safe.

Love
FireFox

You could be a late bloomer

What is a late bloomer ?

 

[WornOutLife]

WornoutLife/ Matt ( if am allowed to use your name, you have used it on other threads. I won't use it again if you refuse me to ok )

I read other peoples threads just so I can know more about the people I talk to on the site . I like having the full picture of things that is my personality.

I mean every word i say

You are a very beautiful man both on the outside and inside too.

Your are such a wonderful, sweet and compassionate soul. I have found confort in the replies you have left in my other threads. I love it when you call me dear.

I am so sorry to hear about your torment and frequent suffering living with bipolar disorder which you have mentioned on the site .

Bipolar is a cruel mental illness which has brought nothing but suffering to those who live with it every day. Bipolar has taken so many beautiful souls from this world and have destroyed so many families in the process.

I don't not wish this illness on my worst enemy.

In the 21st century bipolar is still a very misunderstood mental illness in which sufferers experience prejudice and ignorance from society and sometimes even with thier own families and the people they love the most.

I dont suffer from bipolar disorder and all I can do is educate myself about the illness and others too.

Bipolar people need our love ,compassion and most of all patience.

Please take care of yourself and please keep safe.

Love
FireFox

Of course you can call me Matt, dear.

Thank you very much for your words!

Comments like yours make my days brighter. You are certainly a lovely person.

You can count on me whenever you need to talk.

Have a nice weekend, hugs and see you around! :)

 

[Celerity]

Hey there, I'm a 28 year old woman in the same boat. It's pretty terrible coming up on thirty like this.

 

[FireFox]

For how much it may be worth, being a virgin as a woman is not nearly as bad as being a virgin for a man, in fact some poeple may even find it a good thing.

Personally I would prefer a virgin

Lassy men will be foaming at the mouth at your description regardless of your looks.
You could hire a male escort to save being fed some bullshit by a fake person just after your virginity and looking to hurt your feelings.

This world is too horrific to be worried about being a bloody virgin.

It is just everything in my life. How can i celebrate my birthday next month when I have nothing to show for my life.

I am just disappointed in my life . I always thought once I reach 24 I would be in relationship, living on my own, in a stable job and just being a functional adult.

It upsets me I am not a functional adult because at an age your meant to be having things coming together.

 

[I want to end it]

I'm sorry to hear this OP :( You can be my gf if you want?

 

[FireFox]

Be glad you didn't lose your virginity in high school. High school boys are the worst when it comes to airing that shit out. Also a lot of mind games. And most relationships in highschool don't last. Only a few actually marry their high school sweet hearts.

btw,this is not me just shitting on high school boys, high school girls are just as immature not to mention catty af.

Please stop looking at instagram, twitter, and other social media sites to what a perfect couple looks like. Most of these couples only put what they want people to see and not the nitty gritty of their relationship. And although attraction does play a role in the dating area I don't think it plays much of a role to how a man will treat you in the end. Even the most gorgeous women get cheated on or treated like crap in general. Hollywood couples is a perfect example of that.

If you want to lose your virginity then that should be easy in todays hook up culture. However love I admit will be much harder. But that's true for almost everyone.

The view point that blues eyes, fair skin, and blond hair is superior to all other hair colors, skin colors, and eyes colors is so distorted. Beauty comes in all colors. It'd be boring af if everyone in the world looked like hitler's wet dream.

You're 23-24, that's still young by most ppls definition. A lot of women aren't getting married/having kids until 30 anyway since the economy is shit atm.

Anyone who shits on someone for being a virgin will always be pathetic in my eyes. Why should one care if someone is having sex or not. That just seems creepy and invasive.

I didn't even meet a guy when I was at university. I always thought I would meet someone at university and it worries me I have not.

I am just panicking because I feel like my dating pool is getting smaller and smaller as I get older.

 

[contemplatingjaahil]

I am the same 23 and a virgin. I dont really care though. There are worse things in my life.

 

[FireFox]

Hey there, I'm a 28 year old woman in the same boat. It's pretty terrible coming up on thirty like this.

Being single gets harder with age. I have days in which i just break down crying non stop like right now because I cant take it anymore. All i want is a man to cuddle with, tell me I am amazing , do fun things with and share my life.

It absolutely scares me I will never meet anyone. I have so much love to give and nobody wants it.

Being single is so lonely because everything is so centred on couples.
Nobody ever teaches you how to cope with being single.
I cant take it anymore

Hey there, I'm a 28 year old woman in the same boat. It's pretty terrible coming up on thirty like this.

Being single gets harder with age. I have days in which i just break down crying non stop like right now because I cant take it anymore. All i want is a man to cuddle with, tell me I am amazing , do fun things with and share my life.

It absolutely scares me I will never meet anyone. I have so much love to give and nobody wants it.

Being single is so lonely because everything is so centred on couples.
Nobody ever teaches you how to cope with being single.
I cant take it any

Be glad you didn't lose your virginity in high school. High school boys are the worst when it comes to airing that shit out. Also a lot of mind games. And most relationships in highschool don't last. Only a few actually marry their high school sweet hearts.

btw,this is not me just shitting on high school boys, high school girls are just as immature not to mention catty af.

Please stop looking at instagram, twitter, and other social media sites to what a perfect couple looks like. Most of these couples only put what they want people to see and not the nitty gritty of their relationship. And although attraction does play a role in the dating area I don't think it plays much of a role to how a man will treat you in the end. Even the most gorgeous women get cheated on or treated like crap in general. Hollywood couples is a perfect example of that.

If you want to lose your virginity then that should be easy in todays hook up culture. However love I admit will be much harder. But that's true for almost everyone.

The view point that blues eyes, fair skin, and blond hair is superior to all other hair colors, skin colors, and eyes colors is so distorted. Beauty comes in all colors. It'd be boring af if everyone in the world looked like hitler's wet dream.

You're 23-24, that's still young by most ppls definition. A lot of women aren't getting married/having kids until 30 anyway since the economy is shit atm.

Anyone who shits on someone for being a virgin will always be pathetic in my eyes. Why should one care if someone is having sex or not. That just seems creepy and invasive.

Being single i feel so unattractive and unwanted by men throughout my life . My own father didnt want me. The guys I liked at school would humiliate me and treated me awfully.

Being single is a constant reminder of how I was never the pretty and cool girl at school the boys wanted. It is another reminder of how i didnt fit in at school and life in general.

At school people used to make fun me for the clothes I wore, my face and the fact that i didn't have friends.

When i was in primary school i had a close group of friends who I used to hang out then we all went to different secondary schools. I had one friend from primary school who ended up in the same secondary school as me. When we went to secondary school she met her first boyfriend in year 7 and got new set of friends. She stopped hanging out with me.

When i was in sixth form ( ages 16-18) most people were in relationship. Every day seeing girls in my year group in the sixth form common room with thier boyfriends showing them love i felt so left out. People in class would talk about the places they would goto with thier boyfriends and girlfriends during the summer holidays.

It still upsets me all the rejection all the men did to me over the years.
People in relationships have more fun.

Have you tried online

I dont use dating apps because I am not super pretty so I am at a major disadvantage.

Online dating I don't trust it at all . I dont feel comfortable.

 

[FireFox]

I am the same 23 and a virgin. I dont really care though. There are worse things in my life.

I am so sorry to hear that. If my thread come across as whinny, self centred then I do apologise .

I turn 24 next month and i am upset I have failed to have my whole life together.

It is so embarrassing. How can i celebrate my birthday when i have no career, still living with parents, no idea what I want to do with my life.

I always known what I wanted and now i dont.

Not having my life together is the biggest reason why I want to kill myself . Being single is another reminder of how i failed to have my life together

 

[LifeQuitter2018]

I'm a 27 years old manchild and I sympathize with you. Although being a kissless incel but I don't crave for relationship, I actually want to avoid it.
From the bottom of my heart, I know relationship is difficult and full of dramas. It will be even more difficult for people who are highly sensitive or people who have personality disorders.

The only thing I wanna try out is the sexual pleasure. I don't think I can connect deeply with anyone in this world. People say that there is someone for everyone. I think that's bullshit.

 

[LastFlowers]

Well let's get one thing out of the way, having blonde hair and blue eyes does not make someone attractive. Plenty of people are ostracized and bullied for their appearance despite having those traits. And plenty of brown eyed brunettes are treated like princesses because of their beauty.
I agree that there is an objective standard to this type of thing but it's more about facial structure, proportions, and finally, body composition, rather than the colorization. (Not to say that racism or colorism isn't a thing, I realize it is and I don't doubt it could be a factor to your dilemma.)
There is a difference between subjective trends and a scientifically studied, universal standard that stands the test of time.
Having a different hair, skin, or eye color is not going to make an unattractive person attractive, or vice versa.
Even just narrowing things down to eyes, skin and hair: The shape, size, lashes, and support of the eye would come before the color. The health, youth, and overall complexion of the skin-aka lack of imperfections/pores/acne/texture would come before the color. And the hairline, density, thickness, luster, visible manageability, etc would come far before the color of the hair in importance to how aesthetically pleasing these features appear. (I could get into colorization being more of a factor, via contrast between features, but we will be here all day if I keep droning on about the study of aesthetics in the human form.)
You might desire those things (blonde hair, blue eyes) subjectively, as some do, and that's totally fine, but it's not how being 'good looking' works.

That said, I'm not going to blow smoke up your ass or bullshit you on the topic.
I do still sympathize with you about never being "the pretty one".
When you're not, whether man or woman, life is NOT going to roll out the red carpet for you, and the more unfortunate looking you are, the more consequences and discrimination you experience, the more doors are closed on your face. The inverse is also true.
I will not throw any empty phrases and platitudes at you, like "everyone is beautiful" or "looks don't define you", because they are all idealist statements, not indicative of human nature or the superficial society we live in, not to mention they are most commonly handed out by those in a place of privilege. (Sort of like a wealthy person telling the homeless that money and shelter isn't everything.)
These dismissive comments deny the individual the opportunity to lament a lack of what should be a basic right, comfort in their own skin, and the right to reject the body or face that they had no say in to begin with. It is perfectly understandable to dislike what you had no choice in, especially if it's done you no favors in life. It's not your fault.
Some people compensate heavily for a lack of looks, to the point of exhaustion, and some change their physical self to better suit and express who they really are (sometimes this goes very wrong, but again, not the fault of the person pushed to take such measures...it's not as if we can mold our own face or physique outside of diet and a workout routine).
A few even manage to appreciate their lives or what they look like despite not meeting the usual standard, but society doesn't allow them to live peacefully without a constant dose of mistreatment and neglect.
They are always reminded of where they stand.
Lots of internally beautiful people die in the shadows of the externally pretty, rotting in invisibility or insults.
This is part of what I hate most about the world, and you really cannot understand it unless you are on the shit side of things. I'm so sorry that you seem to find yourself there.

As for the virginity, unlike appearances (of which the expectation does tend to be harsher on women, than men..women are also more prone to being victimized by ageism, which you mentioned with your fear of getting older) it's not as big of a stigma for females, when it comes to a lack of sexual experience.
But because society revolves around sex as much as it does looks, you still aren't going to escape the harassment and negative stereotyping by peers entirely. Clearly from what you've outlined, people are not kind to you about it.
I'm not really sure how to expand on the subject to make you feel any better or if I should even attempt to, because I have my own bias regarding sexual relations. I am quite averse to them and have no desire to have sex with someone. So it's difficult for me to empathize with that want or "need" and I may come across as minimizing that specific part of your situation. I will just say that it's not at all surprising that you feel this way, unfortunately. I have come across many others who feel the exact same.

I will move on to the relationship status aspect of your post..I agree that society puts major stock into romantic coupling, and it's harmful to those who cannot manage it, are excluded from it, or do not desire to be a part of it.
It puts them in the position of never being someone's priority, save for maybe their parent's, who will eventually pass.
We take away the importance and weight of family of origin relationships, platonic relationships, friendships, and anything that's not a romantic/monogamous couple. We have so much significance tied to 'the couple' that it leaves none for anyone else, or in the very least-far less.
All our eggs are in one basket.
We celebrate it with abundance and pressure people to strive for it as if it's some major accomplishment in life (it's not), we use it to facilitate procreation and selfishly bring about more suffering, we throw money and gifts at it, we have ceremonies, it's all so ostentatious.
And for what? When so much of it goes down in flames.
(To note, religion as well, offers itself as a guilty vessel of the sentiment behind a lot of this misplaced prestige. Old roots to the arranged liaisons among wealthy/politically involved families also mark a page in the history books regarding this topic.)
Idk about anyone else, but I've had more than enough of it.

I also agree that many couples tend to flaunt their status and though I don't desire their ridiculous exhibitionism and loss of individuality, they do get on my nerves because everything is worse in pairs..people feel more brave and impenetrable when they have someone by their side, it leads to some very selfish and childish behavior, and nasty treatment of others, because they've got back up, they've got built in support, they can more easily embody the shape of their own asshole.
I have been the victim of the "in your face" pda as well, to the point they look over at me to make sure I'm witnessing and listening to their standing pillow talk.
It's fucking bizarre! (Rampant on social media too! Your hate is understandable.)
Meanwhile, I'm just trying to get the fuck out of dodge because I've got way bigger fish to fry and I'm not on this earth to be an audience to such pointless, self indulgent filth.
The whole "we do it because we can't help ourselves, that's how much we love eachother" excuse is complete garbage bs.
They have self control, they just don't want to utilize it.
I once read a post on another site where someone admitted to enjoying making people feel uncomfortable by openly displaying heavy petting and that it made them feel superior and powerful, they got off on making others feel envious or disquieted.
I don't do their in-depth description justice.
Came from a vile individual obviously, quite disgusting, but not uncommon, just more forthcoming about it.
When you are outside 'the couple', you matter less, even your privacy matters less to them. They will protect their own secrets and share yours with eachother.
For example, how many couples do we all know where one or both checks the other person's phone? A lot of them think they have every right and it's part of trust building, to have open access..but you know what I think? ..it's one of the most despicable things I've ever seen normalized. They actually think they have the right to not only invade the privacy of the person they are in a relationship with, but also the privacy and sanctity of all the conversations the phone owner has with OTHER PEOPLE. But remember "other people" don't matter to the couple, their privacy doesn't matter, their feelings don't matter. Once someone is part of a pair, if you know them then you better realize that you either accept that the other half will know about all your dirty laundry and skeletons in your closet, or you reduce your relationship with your loved one to talking about the weather.
It just amazes me that most people realize the immorality of letting your friend or family member read your phone when you have other confidant's sensitive information on there (as well as your own) but somehow bf/gf or hubby and wifey are exempt from the ethics of such a scenario.
Of course this extends way past the device stalking example. Your spoken convos and known past are also at risk of being relayed.
Why, you ask? Because "the couple" is more important than the individual, the whole is more important than the parts, and we are all forced to bow down to such nonsense, or join the crowd.
I say no thanks (if you couldn't already imagine me rolling my eyes throughout my last few sentences), but I understand it's not that simple for everyone. And that being single is also a reminder of other misfortunes and traumas in life, so I feel your pain.

Loneliness is one thing, and it's not good for anyone (different from enjoying time alone) but society makes it so that we can only satiate the need for companionship by entering into a romantic/sexual relationship.
Even if we found value in other types of relationships, that value dwindles as we get older and all those we once held dear toss us to the side for the prospect and eventual actualization of their pairing with a "significant other".
In that respect, this force of the status quo affects us all, whether we are interested or not.
I'm not calling for the destruction or dismantling of romance entirely, but some god damn self reflection by society and its imbalance of priorities would be nice..

In the end, I'm not sure how to comfort you, without telling lies, but one truth I can share is that, by the brief description you gave of yourself and what you enjoy vs the typical, you absolutely do have value, and it's the fault of others that they are missing out on someone who they turned away from, for shallow and thoughtless reasons. I apologize for how meaningless my final words appear, against the behemoth of what tortures you, I regret that it cannot hold a candle to other, more unfortunate truths that appear to be perpetuated despite the immense harm they cause.

 

[Tkmiz_Tsukumizu]

Sex isn't everything. Love is.

 

[Into The Void]

As a man I was a virgin until I was about 35 years old. But my story is complicated. I dealt with several health conditions for many years, still use a wheelchair and a cane, and had to deal with delusions caused by a fundamentalist Christian family which took me decades to unravel. So I can't blame myself too much. I never let it bother me that much. Given that there was no way I was going to be 40 and still a virgin. So I paid an escort. Had some fun times for about 2 years having sex with escorts. But now I think I found true love, now I'm happily in love with a 34 year old women, me being 38. We have even talked about getting married some day. We have great meaningful and deep conversations all the time.

I would say if this the main reason your suicidal, then you should stick around and put yourself out there and see if you can find true love. The potential rewards are great. If not then the choice is yours, but many people find love later on in life.

 

[SweetDreams500]

I want to be used as a cumdump by a cute Norwegian guy, but it will never happen

I am bound to die alone
I'm so lonely

 

[fufa]

Men want the perfect attractive women. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and prefer doing fun activities which dont involve partying willl never be enough. We live in a shallow world which cares about looks and beauty. Sometimes i wish i had blonde hair and blue eyes men will find me attractive as this standard of beauty is promoted in society. I am a brown skinned woman with brown eyes i hate it because these features i find are dull.

Being single in my 20s has made be bitter and angry men never loved me back and envious of women who have boyfriends and husbands.

Men want the perfect attractive women like we see on Instagram, love island and celebrity culture. The fact that I am caring, like meaningful conversations and doing fun activities willl never be enough.

Honestly I feel the same way except replace 'Men' with 'Women'. I think in reality there are caring people of both genders, but they are very hard to find because all the places to meet new people are dominated by the more shallow types.
I'm a single guy in my 20s, and I feel like I'll never be loved either.