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Lifeless mindset

Lifeless mindset

See you on the other side
Oct 20, 2020
308
I've had a really rough day today and I honestly wish I could just leave right now but unfortunately, I only have 3 options.

CTB right now: Attempt to ctb in my room and risk someone hearing me throw up, gasping for air, possible seizures?, moving around on the floor in discomfort, SI making me want to call for help.

CTB in a hotel: i currently don't have the money for a hotel but I will have the money at the begging of February. If I get a hotel I risk: someone hearing me throw up, possible seizures?, SI making me want to call for help.

CTB in the woods: it is currently winter and I feel like dying in extremely cold weather would be far from a "comfortable" death. I feel like I'd have to wait till the weather is warm which won't be for months.

Overall, I just feel really lost right now and I wish I could just end my suffering as I sit here but sadly that is not an option. Im trying to stay strong and not do anything out of impulse but its rough. Thanks for listening to whats going on in my head currently.
 
Last edited:
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UpandDownPrincess

UpandDownPrincess

Elementalist
Dec 31, 2019
833
You are smart to treat this like an impulse and not act rashly.

Bad days, even shitty ones, happen to everybody but try not to let it be "the straw that broke the camel's back."

As you've seen from your time on here, impulse decisions rarely end well. Don't make all your days suck by having to spend them on a psych ward.
 
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Lifeless mindset

Lifeless mindset

See you on the other side
Oct 20, 2020
308
You are smart to treat this like an impulse and not act rashly.

Bad days, even shitty ones, happen to everybody but try not to let it be "the straw that broke the camel's back."

As you've seen from your time on here, impulse decisions rarely end well. Don't make all your days suck by having to spend them on a psych ward.
Exactly. Thanks you.
 
S

SuicidallyCurious

Enlightened
Dec 20, 2020
1,715
CTB in woods is probably the best option but it should be far far away from people and not just slightly off the road in some park.

Hotel is good also. If you are throwing up unless it's going on for like hours likely no one bothers you
 
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Lifeless mindset

Lifeless mindset

See you on the other side
Oct 20, 2020
308
CTB in woods is probably the best option but it should be far far away from people and not just slightly off the road in some park.

Hotel is good also. If you are throwing up unless it's going on for like hours likely no one bothers you
True
 
Death is beautiful

Death is beautiful

Warlock
May 20, 2021
792
The hotel is a good option, just ask them not to bother you in any way, except what is your method?
 
S

SuicidallyCurious

Enlightened
Dec 20, 2020
1,715
The hotel is a good option, just ask them not to bother you in any way, except what is your method?
Don't even ask them not to bother you. That raises suspicion. Go in like a normal person. If you throw up briefly , this is normal activity in many hotels because hotels are often full of drunks
 
Depressed Cat

Depressed Cat

Mage
Jan 4, 2022
567
I'd say don't let one rough day make you take an impulsive decision and attempt to CTB.

SI is very strong and since your method is SN, which is not exactly quick, SI may kick in and you may find yourself taken to hospital and then a psychiatric ward.

Hang in there, it may get better tomorrow or in the days to come. If not, you already have the means to CTB and you can take a non-impulsive, well-thought out decision to CTB at a time & place of your own choosing.
 
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