• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block. If you're located in the UK, we recommend using a VPN to maintain access.

Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
Be strong and make sure he hears you.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LegaliseIt!
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Be strong and make sure he hears you.
Oh I'm confident... and impulsive... does that work? wait... impulsive might be bad when talking to a psychiatrist... might need to try and control that.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LegaliseIt!
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
omg I just realized I set my work reminder for my appointment time, not my leave time!
 
  • Wow
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and BlueWidow
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
1 hr 20 minutes.... and the lieing begins lol. also know as psychiatrist appointment... let's see...
Need to take SN out of purse before going in when I do lol.
Have nurse to talk to first... she's the main one I have to lie to as the psychiatrist has an issue with eye contact....
oh yeah and the entry form... let's see... last time I went total suicidal marks.... hmm.... probably should go middle->happy with a slight few to depressed so it seems honest... think there's like 10 questions, 5 point scale... so.... 2 as totally happy, 2 as almost... 4 as middle... 2 depressed like might work... might play by ear...
answer questions as "no plans..." mention current state...
she'll question... maintain consistency as on camera throughout building... ....

yeah... that should work...
Sounds like you're working out your plan. I hope it works for you. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. :heart:
omg I just realized I set my work reminder for my appointment time, not my leave time!
Uh-oh!
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Sounds like you're working out your plan. I hope it works for you. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. :heart:
Yeah... granted the more planned I have something the more to hell it ends up going... but I have a plan... all I can do... I'm at least trying... so there's that.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and BlueWidow
Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
As I predicted. Running around like a chicken with my head cut off, putting out fires and getting nothing done.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: LegaliseIt!, BlueWidow and Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Just threw up
Sorry :( hope it doesn't happen more! I don't suppose you could get in somewhere sooner?


------------------------------

I've even been practicing smiling ,and listening to happy music to try and alter mood so I can fake it easier.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and BlueWidow
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Sorry :( hope it doesn't happen more! I don't suppose you could get in somewhere sooner?


------------------------------

I've even been practicing smiling ,and listening to happy music to try and alter mood so I can fake it easier.
If things don't improve by Monday, I'll go see my doctor after the program
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and BlueWidow
Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
5:03 pm. I got nothing done today despite doing a lot. It's like having a refrigerator full of food and nothing to eat.
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: LegaliseIt!, departing and BlueWidow
departing

departing

Enlightened
Jul 5, 2019
1,502
5:03 pm. I got nothing done today despite doing a lot. It's like having a refrigerator full of food and nothing to eat.
I'm sure you did more than you're giving yourself credit for!! Sometimes there's too much going on.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
5:03 pm. I got nothing done today despite doing a lot. It's like having a refrigerator full of food and nothing to eat.
I hate it when I have a full fridge and there still nothing to eat! I'm sure you've been running yourself ragged today @Jean4. :heart: :hug:
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: departing
Jean4

Jean4

Remember. I am ALWAYS right.... until I’m not
Apr 28, 2019
7,557
I'm sure you did more than you're giving yourself credit for!! Sometimes there's too much going on.
Yup. Today was put out fires at work. Tomorrow I have the Skype meeting about Corona Virus that was supposed to happen today and was moved to a Saturday and they never gave me a time.

I need to do a do over for today.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: LegaliseIt!, BlueWidow and departing
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
At psychiatrist...nurse said very much Ib touch in touch with my mental state....waiting for psychiatrist now hee hee. One down one to go
Oh and she said manic
Oh also on 4g now their wireless. Might be confident but not stupid lol
 
  • Love
Reactions: LegaliseIt!, departing and BlueWidow
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
______________________________

Fuck! My SIL just called and now her husband is in the hospital with a heart problem. He's had heart problems before. I think he has congestive heart failure.

On one hand, this is the perfect time for me to ctb because she's distracted and I know she won't bother me and I'm pretty much guaranteed to not be found too early.

On the other hand, I don't know how right it is to do it now while her husband is in the hospital. He's been in and out of the hospital several times over the last year or so that I've been here, mostly for pneumonia and other lung issues. Now he's having heart issues. I'm just kind of afraid that he's going to end up dying and it's going to mess everything up for me. And I know that sounds extremely selfish, but I can't help it. I just always feel stuck. There's never a good time for me to do it because everyone else keeps getting sick.

It's like when there's no one sick and nothing for her to focus on, I can't do it then because then her focus is on me and I'm much less likely to be successful. On the other hand, when there is someone else sick or some other thing going on where she's distracted, and I would be much more successful, I feel bad for doing it when there's someone else that she knows in the hospital or sick or something, do you know what I mean? :notsure:
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: Deleted member 1465, LegaliseIt!, departing and 3 others
Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
______________________________

Fuck! My SIL just called and now her husband is in the hospital with a heart problem. He's had heart problems before. I think he has congestive heart failure.

On one hand, this is the perfect time for me to ctb because she's distracted and I know she won't bother me and I'm pretty much guaranteed to not be found too early.

On the other hand, I don't know how right it is to do it now while her husband is in the hospital. He's been in and out of the hospital several times over the last year or so that I've been here, mostly for pneumonia and other lung issues. Now he's having heart issues. I'm just kind of afraid that he's going to end up dying and it's going to mess everything up for me. And I know that sounds extremely selfish, but I can't help it. I just always feel stuck. There's never a good time for me to do it because everyone else keeps getting sick.

It's like when there's no one sick and nothing for her to focus on, I can't do it then because then her focus is on me and I'm much less likely to be successful. On the other hand, when there is someone else sick or some other thing going on where she's distracted, and I would be much more successful, I feel bad for doing it when there's someone else that she knows in the hospital or sick or something, do you know what I mean? :notsure:
I know what you mean but I don't know what you mean. I understand your feelings but not your situation.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow
departing

departing

Enlightened
Jul 5, 2019
1,502
______________________________

Fuck! My SIL just called and now her husband is in the hospital with a heart problem. He's had heart problems before. I think he has congestive heart failure.

On one hand, this is the perfect time for me to ctb because she's distracted and I know she won't bother me and I'm pretty much guaranteed to not be found too early.

On the other hand, I don't know how right it is to do it now while her husband is in the hospital. He's been in and out of the hospital several times over the last year or so that I've been here, mostly for pneumonia and other lung issues. Now he's having heart issues. I'm just kind of afraid that he's going to end up dying and it's going to mess everything up for me. And I know that sounds extremely selfish, but I can't help it. I just always feel stuck. There's never a good time for me to do it because everyone else keeps getting sick.

It's like when there's no one sick and nothing for her to focus on, I can't do it then because then her focus is on me and I'm much less likely to be successful. On the other hand, when there is someone else sick or some other thing going on where she's distracted, and I would be much more successful, I feel bad for doing it when there's someone else that she knows in the hospital or sick or something, do you know what I mean? :notsure:
I get it. Now's the 'perfect' time because she has her hands full and is distracted from you. Yet you're unsure how to proceed. Personally, I wouldn't do anything if I was in your shoes. I'd wait out a better time and do it then.
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
I'm so tired. Might take a nap
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and departing
B

Backwood_tilt

UnEnlightened
Dec 27, 2019
889
I feel bad for doing it when there's someone else that she knows in the hospital or sick or something, do you know what I mean?

totally. You don't want to overwhelm someone with the threat of or realized mortality at once. It is a lot to go through just having one person to worry about. Can see how you would feel so conflicted about this.

I don't think there's ever going to be a good time for them to receive the news though. i think you should prioritize your own needs and your comfort, first. There's only so much you can do to minimize the hurt for others, you know?
I'm so tired. Might take a nap

enjoy your nap!
 
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
Well I'm bipolar.....and might have another disorder that has b and p in it rofl. With them believing I was basically totally happy with no chance of suicide. I was offered voluntary commitment. And told he didn't think I needed involuntary....yet. This is why I liedand I still almost ended up in one
 
  • Hugs
  • Wow
Reactions: Deleted member 1465, LegaliseIt!, departing and 1 other person
B

Backwood_tilt

UnEnlightened
Dec 27, 2019
889
Well I'm bipolar.....and might have another disorder that has b and p in it rofl. With them believing I was basically totally happy with no chance of suicide. I was offered voluntary commitment. And told he didn't think I needed involuntary....yet. This is why I liedand I still almost ended up in one

You got diagnosed with both, today? You kind of had a feeling about bipolar though, didn't you?

glad you didn't get committed. Good job! If they thought you were totally happy why did they still offer you voluntary commitment?
 
  • Like
Reactions: BlueWidow
departing

departing

Enlightened
Jul 5, 2019
1,502
You got diagnosed with both, today? You kind of had a feeling about bipolar though, didn't you?

glad you didn't get committed. Good job! If they thought you were totally happy why did they still offer you voluntary commitment?
I've been offered voluntary before when I don't meet the criteria for involuntary... but some time on the ward may give a chance for medications to stabilize and things to calm down.
I'm so tired. Might take a nap
Hope you have a nice nap...
 
  • Love
Reactions: BlueWidow
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
I've been offered voluntary before when I don't meet the criteria for involuntary... but some time on the ward may give a chance for medications to stabilize and things to calm down.

Hope you have a nice nap...
I've been given 2 options, voluntary and involuntary. If I didn't take voluntary, I would be given involuntary
 
  • Like
Reactions: departing and Carina
Carina

Carina

Angelic
Dec 22, 2019
4,005
You got diagnosed with both, today? You kind of had a feeling about bipolar though, didn't you?

glad you didn't get committed. Good job! If they thought you were totally happy why did they still offer you voluntary commitment?
One was a Dr mentioned all criteria upped lithium to 3x dosage I believe and blood tests to maintain manic and depressive states. Nurse just did that....he and nurse implied other and I saw the screen....good eyes


And yeah...all my responses I made positive....something said to...glad I did. He had no reason to I made one comment regarding thoughts but only as on flipping stage so not current or common. But also said that I could impulsively do something. Ok that was stupid....but eh impulsively answered. Oops

Covered with didn't haves methodthough so no clue how though so it's not like itd go anywhere
 
  • Like
Reactions: LegaliseIt! and Jean4
BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
totally. You don't want to overwhelm someone with the threat of or realized mortality at once. It is a lot to go through just having one person to worry about. Can see how you would feel so conflicted about this.

I don't think there's ever going to be a good time for them to receive the news though. i think you should prioritize your own needs and your comfort, first. There's only so much you can do to minimize the hurt for others, you know?

Yes, we'll see if he has to stay in the hospital, and if he does, for how long. I'm willing to wait for some period of time, but not forever.

I'm just having an awful day today. After having an awful night last night. And I can't even go to sleep because of this fucking injury. I'm so tired I'm about to fall over, but I can't get comfortable when I lie down. I don't know what I'm going to do. I really don't want to take any more Vicodin. I hate that stuff so much.
Now that I know what it is and I've taken it before, when I watch House MD, I don't know how he can eat that stuff like candy the way he does on that show. That would make me so sick. Are you familiar with the show I'm talking about?

Dr. Gregory House MD, an asshole of a doctor with a limp leg portrayed by Hugh Laurie, leads a team of diagnosticians as the Head of Diagnostic Medicine at the fictional Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital in Princeton, New Jersey.[1]

I used to love that show. I have no clue as to why. I discovered it when I was forced into the psych ward against my will. They had the TV on and there was nothing else to do in there but watch TV and they were running a House marathon. Up to that point, I'd never even heard of the show. House had a bad leg and a bad attitude and he popped Vicodin like they were candy. I also remember being shocked when I found out that Hugh Laurie was British because he did such an excellent American accent.
I've been given 2 options, voluntary and involuntary. If I didn't take voluntary, I would be given involuntary
Then it really wasn't all that voluntary, was it?
 
  • Love
  • Aww..
Reactions: LegaliseIt!, Backwood_tilt, Carina and 1 other person

Similar threads

kittengirl7
Replies
1
Views
885
Suicide Discussion
Some place nice
Some place nice
enjoy
Replies
15
Views
2K
Suicide Discussion
Hopeindeath!
H