Pro-lifers (who I usually call anti-choicers, because they only seem to care about simply keeping people alive with very little regard for their actual QUALITY of life) make me feel even more trapped, misunderstood and furthermore even more suicidal than usual, and one thing that really gets to me in particular is when they say:
"Just ask for/get help!"
Like it's really that fucking easy, or as if everyone responds in the same way to the same general treatment models (and without being written off as "non-compliant" if they don't), or as if help is truly ALWAYS available, without taking important factors into account like money, accessibility, travel, doctor availability, illness/disability that might prevent someone from leaving their house or speaking, etc.
There's also a similar zinger that "pro-lifers" like to say to people who have been through hell and are right on the edge:
"You should have just asked for help."
Fuck off with that victim-blaming bullshit.
I fought like hell for help and was left to rot for years, and it's a huge contributor as to why my condition is as bad as it is right now. I was (and am) suffering from a multitude of problems including severe trauma, a complex, poorly understood degenerative illness and severe, chronic full-body pain, but because I also have a diagnosis of generalized anxiety disorder and major depression on my medical records, these health "professionals" (whose help I'd seeked out) had already made up their minds about me before they even stepped foot into the exam room. I was accused of malingering and hypochondriasis, I was called a faker by my own family, I was dragged by my ass, cornered, gaslit, degraded and denied basic assistance and care from the health and social systems, I was locked up and forced to take more of the medications that had made me worse in the first place after calling one of those hotlines because I just wanted to talk to someone... shit, even when I was 8 and tried to tell someone after one of the countless episodes of sexual abuse I went through, I was scolded and told to keep my clothes on. It just goes on and on and ON and I'm fucking TIRED of trying to get help, only to be neglected or forced to deal with so much incompetence and meanness in combination with such little empathy (if at all) from the very institutions that are supposed to be there to HELP, and the majority of the times I've tried to get help, I've always come out even worse on the other side... so forgive me for not wanting do any of this anymore. If it were just me I'd take one for the team, but I know that I'm far from being the only one who's been through this, and it makes me sick.
It's only when you're right on the edge that these pro-lifers (anti-choicers), along with their incredible lack of perspective, seem to give a fuck about what happens to people, and are quick to leave them in the dirt again once they've made themselves feel better ("yay me, I just saved the life of someone who didn't want to be saved #itgetsbetter #1800suicide <333") and have done essentially nothing to help people in the long run once they're not in an immediate crisis, nor do they seem to be terribly concerned with trying to help make this world a more bearable place to live, like advocating for disability payments that disabled people can actually live off of, for example, or simply – I don't know – NOT clutching their pearls at the mere mention of suicide and actually LISTENING to what suicidal people have to say and hearing them out without just blindly telling them that "it gets better", invalidating them by saying that "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem", trying to take away the only online community in which they find solace, respite and understanding, and trying to rob people of their own autonomy. They seem to have this fairytale image of how the world is (and I understand that it's largely a coping mechanism for survival and to help one feel justified in reproducing), but the shitty reality is that this world is an unjust place, some problems are not fixable and not everybody wants to be here.
