Tell me about your day/vent.

[Dead_Mouse]

Yeah, I was thinking of an upwards angle through the mouth to make a mush out of anything up there. I just hope I don't survive. If I do I hope that an artery up there somewhere got severed and I bleed out. I also heard that the *vibrations*? (maybe I'm wrong on that) from the impact can traumatize and damage nearby tissue even if no projectiles touch that tissue. I know it'll be messy and SI will kick in, but I hope I can do it.

Sounds effective! I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide on : )

 

[Arcitect]

Sounds effective! I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide on : )

Thanks, the firearms megathread says firearms have a 80 something percent success rate so I'm hoping. I hope you find peace and happiness one day too, whether that be here on Earth or elsewhere : ).

 

[vulkann]

I feel a pit in my stomach everyday because my ex told me she has feelings for me still but also has feelings for a new guy. She tells me that she loves me but then goes to his apartment and sleeps in the same bed with him. life is already shitty but she was the only person i trusted/loved.

 

[NeedAnEscape]

Today, I got less done than I probably should have. I kept getting subtle reminders that I am living life for other people, rather than out of my own will to do so. I am aware of impending deadlines for my future, but I cannot bring myself to care anymore. People want to put me in a hyper-stressed state, because that's what I should be feeling, but my actions are not in-line with what I 'should' be feeling. People have been reminding me about the goodness of God, but I cannot comprehend how people can appreciate God, in a world that has brought so much pain.

 

[borderlinee]

For me, when it comes to planning, I already have "Get in the bathtub and start hyperventilating". I feel like even if I was as suicidal as I was last semester, back when I didn't know about this site and didn't know this method, I still wouldn't be able to pick a date. It feels like I have the strongest SI in the world. Maybe it's for the best because I've been doing better than I was last semester, but still, sometimes I wish I had CTB'd back in highschool.

Is the method or the date the hardest part for you?

Are you me? I keep thinking about that method everyday. Yeah I think it's hard to imagine that I could just sit with myself and then ctb. I'm still struggling with the method, I heard swb doesn't work that well, especially if you're trying it in a bathtub. I think if I had sn, I'd relax for a bit and then do it when I think is the right time. I'd say it's the method for me.

 

[LostInTheWoods]

I woke up thinking about the only person who ever treat me normally. Person that i wronged and that of course went away from me. I would like to text her again saying again i'm sorry, but not for searching forgiveness because it's too late and i accepted it, i would do it just for myself basically, except that i would like to sustain her since she's always unhappy maybe i could say look at me, you have values and stranghts dont let yourself go. I've been suicidal enough to sign up here because in the last couple days i had many problems at work, so i just thought again about the past. Now is sunday and everyone is living their life while i'm here thinking about a person who doesn't even remember me probably

 

[Dead_Mouse]

Are you me? I keep thinking about that method everyday. Yeah I think it's hard to imagine that I could just sit with myself and then ctb. I'm still struggling with the method, I heard swb doesn't work that well, especially if you're trying it in a bathtub. I think if I had sn, I'd relax for a bit and then do it when I think is the right time. I'd say it's the method for me.

I see. I don't know much about SN. The reason the bathtub method is appealing for me is that if I somehow fail, I won't have any marks or signs that anything happened. There's also a ton of time to back out while you're filling the tub which could be good or bad, and if anyone questions me I'll tell them I'm practicing holding my breath XD.

I have an advantage though. Submerging my chest in hot water makes me light-headed, so I think it would be much easier for me. Like I said though, I've been doing much better until the night before last, and even that's not too bad. I don't really have a reason at the moment.

I think becoming dizzy from hyperventilating could possibly allow me to focus on my self-hatred easier, making it easier to drown myself, idk though. Ya know? Some kind of masochistic desire to destroy my cognition. Never tried it though.

 

[borderlinee]

I see. I don't know much about SN. The reason the bathtub method is appealing for me is that if I somehow fail, I won't have any marks or signs that anything happened. There's also a ton of time to back out while you're filling the tub which could be good or bad, and if anyone questions me I'll tell them I'm practicing holding my breath XD.

I have an advantage though. Submerging my chest in hot water makes me light-headed, so I think it would be much easier for me. Like I said though, I've been doing much better until the night before last, and even that's not too bad. I don't really have a reason at the moment.

I think becoming dizzy from hyperventilating could possibly allow me to focus on my self-hatred easier, making it easier to drown myself, idk though. Ya know? Some kind of masochistic desire to destroy my cognition. Never tried it though.

That's true, I am kinda nervous to try it because you're supposed to hyperventilate really hard and then not let your SI take over as you drown in water. Honestly I'm just terrified of getting some kind of damage if I fail. Hyperventilating might also freak me out, make me panic and put me in survival mode, I am not sure at all tho.

 

[Dead_Mouse]

That's true, I am kinda nervous to try it because you're supposed to hyperventilate really hard and then not let your SI take over as you drown in water. Honestly I'm just terrified of getting some kind of damage if I fail. Hyperventilating might also freak me out, make me panic and put me in survival mode, I am not sure at all tho.

Well, there's some mammalian reflex that I heard somewhere on this site, where if you stick your head in cold water it'll calm you down. If I tried I would use hot water to get me light headed, but cold water might be your best bet.

The other thing, I heard from watching a YouTube video by Vsauce (if that's spelled correctly) about holding your breath. In the video he said never to hyperventilate before going underwater because hyperventilating gets rid of carbon dioxide, while still having regular amounts of oxygen. He said that that way you'll end up drowning without even feeling like you're drowning. You might not panic that way.

As for damage, I have no idea. Maybe water in your lungs is bad, but I feel like the worst thing possible would be someone "saving you" after parts of the brain loose oxygen. Maybe you would end up with something like a stroke, but I don't think that could happen if you're sure nobody will pull you out. Also, that's just a complete guess.

Maybe you should try something new though. I had been feeling better about my life after having joined my school's anime club, and you don't have to be in a school to join a club either

 

[JustABug]

Thank you! ^_^ Basically, the king asked you to find a treasure, but you got lost and have to find your way back home! :) How has yours been? :) I didn't see you respond much about you to anyone else! xD

Mines been good !! I've been watching sam and colby's new conjuring videos and in their recent episode it helped me become more and peace with the idea of cbt.

 

[EternalShore]

Mines been good !! I've been watching sam and colby's new conjuring videos and in their recent episode it helped me become more and peace with the idea of cbt.

oooo. Sounds very spoopy for Halloween! ^_^ and that is nice, yes :)