Help Survivors of hanging, what did it feel like?

[sanctionedusage]

Specifically full suspension hanging.

• What did it feel like?
• How long were you conscious?
• Is the jerking, swaying, etc. a conscious reaction to the sensation you experienced, or likely after you're unconscious?

Before finding this site, the closest to suicide information I could get was footage from livestreamed suicides. I'm unsettled by the thought of dying from a gunshot to the head, even if I know it's instantaneous and suffering-free. Don't know why, I'm just disturbed by anything internal. Same with drugs or poison, so I've always been set on hanging as my method.

But every single video I've seen details so much jerking, shaking, what looks like conscious hand movements trying to claw at the ligament. And honestly, regret. What few sources I can reach suggest it's reflexive and post-consciousness, but it looks so coherent and aware-- even sometimes occurring just a few seconds after the person steps off the ledge. Some people even say it's the dumbest method with the most suffering involved.

 

[SissySteph]

I tried a practice run with a climbing harness on to take alot of the weight off. Wasn't intending to die. Very quickly though I started to black out (zero pain) and somehow got back on the chair. I had zero idea where I was and who I was for say 15 seconds.
Also, am pretty sure most movements in vids are when unconscious.

 

[Salkak]

I tried a practice run with a climbing harness on to take alot of the weight off. Wasn't intending to die. Very quickly though I started to black out (zero pain) and somehow got back on the chair. I had zero idea where I was and who I was for say 15 seconds.
Also, am pretty sure most movements in vids are when unconscious.

Sounds peaceful in a weird way. I also practice choking myself at times, I almost always start blacking out in a few seconds