PlannedforPeru

PlannedforPeru

SaSu. Lurker
Sep 21, 2024
35
I'm unsure if this is allowed, personally wouldn't consider this encouragement.

Despite the anonymity, I'm looking for guidance on improvements. Anything from 'what would've been nice to hear had it been someone you've known', to grammatical changes, I welcome everything. I felt as though it's in better hands here than an AI log.

As cold as it sounds, I'd rather feedback then possible condolences as I've seen a trend in similar posts. My priority is the wellbeing of the person in question, so I'd like to make this as optimized as humanely possible whether that be emphasizing or lessening on the following tones (feel free to introduce more):
  • straightforward
  • conclusive
  • reassuring
  • comforting
  • accommodating
It's really short, some details redacted if not slightly edited, seriously thanks to whoever can provide feedback. I'm looking forward to it.

WARNING LOTS OF RUN ONS

[ person ] I'm writing this out to you because despite my rock bottom amount of energy, you most deserve to be addressed. Leaving without giving you some sort of final note felt like a huge insult to everything. I'd often get anxiety around [ day ] knowing I couldn't gift a fraction of what you do for others; not that you expected to be. You're a real-life success story, author, giver, volunteer, class-climber, and optimist despite all the bullshit life hurled your way. I truly don't get it, that quality hasn't rubbed off on me I'm sure. Greater than the culmination of all those other things you were (and are still) best at being a [ adjective + noun ].

Out of all the things I've considered myself lucky for, second place isn't even on the radar in the face of your presence. It just sucks that this is what it took for me to finally verbalize it to you.

There was no 'could've gone differently' or it wouldn't have changed if you 'had just done…' . I've made up my mind along time ago, and I'd like to think I hide it well. It may take some time but I really do want you to find solace in the fact that I'm at peace at a choosing of my own. My beliefs of afterlife are that there is nothing, the after-death matches the before-birth. The short of it is, I'm no longer interested in perpetually encountering and solving problems for no grand purpose other than to survive and be one more day closer to the grave regardless.

The sooner my end the better my outcome. This wasn't an act of impulse, I'd hope my method speaks to that fact. I'd also hope you'd respect my rationality enough when I was alive to believe me when I say there really was no other way. The lot of you made my stay here a good one.

You can reach out to my most recent therapist here for any questions:


I have an automated email set to send to him on [ date ] with enough evidence to consent revoking my patient confidentiality.

Lastly [ person ], I'm sorry. You can find my [ assets ] in [ location ]. There's no amount or combination of words that could give you closure, but [ inside-saying ].
 

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