Help suicide ideation mechanism

[nayomi]

i foumd the mechanism that makes me suicidal. at least one of them.
it all started by contemplation of why i hate so much stuff. it is because my emotions tends to overwhelm me so i am very sensitive to lots of thing.
my way to deal with it is by not caring about things and being emotionless. so being too emotional in a way i cant deal with it or being emotionless make me in pain.
the thing is that it mask really great because my life looks normal pretty much and i can have fun. when i think about things or feel i am just in pain because of the intensity or lack of emotions so life looks terrible for me. this is when i suicidal ideation kicks in because everything looks bleak for me so why living? then i want to die but i wont ctb if i feel good so i make myself depressed to actually do it.

so i guess i need healthy ways to deal with this emotional intensity

 

[never mind me]

Maybe you should research online for skills to deal with strong emotions. I don't know how easy it is to find on the internet, but I think there are some resources. It's mostly recommended for people who have trouble with unhealty behaviours like self harm or alcohol or drug abuse or binge eating, but it might be helpful for you as well. Or if you can try to access therapy and tell your therapist that you need help handling strong emotions.

 

[nayomi]

Maybe you should research online for skills to deal with strong emotions. I don't know how easy it is to find on the internet, but I think there are some resources. It's mostly recommended for people who have trouble with unhealty behaviours like self harm or alcohol or drug abuse or binge eating, but it might be helpful for you as well. Or if you can try to access therapy and tell your therapist that you need help handling strong emotions.

good fucking idea ty

 

[Ysnmldao]

good fucking idea ty

I'm in a similar situation
For me suicide ideation was more of a shutdown mechanism brought by my emotionlessness, and honestly? Just anhedonia, and some other mental issues.
The best way to handle such suicide ideation where it's linked to you being emotionless is to force yourself to actually face your emotions. Like, say, you can only feel sadness, and can cry by remembering an event or doing something specific. If you've suppressed ur emotions long enough, you should understand me when I say it's gut wrenching when you finally release even a little of the pent up emotions.
So, begin like that. Face your emotions. Let them out. Then slowly but surely learn to actually handle the emotions more... humanely

I'm just saying this, but I'm unsure if it works or not