When I was 19 (34 years ago) I attempted suicide using an OTC sleep aid. I'd done something stupid that I knew was going to affect my quality of life. I've never been glad to have survived, in fact I've often taken comfort in having made the effort.
The dose was one pill and I took 96. Bought two boxes of 48 and swallowed all of them. I was living back home with my parents at the time and they were aware that I was in distress but not about my plan.
After taking the pills I lay down in my bed and expected to die. I don't even think I left a note, my folks would know why I did it, didn't see any reason to say anything else. I don't know exactly how long I was asleep but I woke up at some point and the first thing I noticed was my stomach was bloated. Tapping my fingers on it felt and sounded like a drum. I was also hallucinating...I could clearly see bugs crawling up the wall and also our cat sitting on my bookshelf, though the cat had died about a year prior. I lay in that condition for a while and then I heard my dad downstairs in the kitchen getting ready for work.
I got out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom and puked. Many of the pills came up undigested. I thought my dad must have heard the commotion so I went downstairs and told him what I'd done. We went to the hospital where they had me drink charcoal and then a doctor came into the room and angrily asked why I'd taken so many pills. I explained my situation but he wasn't sympathetic, just made me say I wouldn't do it again and discharged me.
I'd since scraped out a life for myself, even had some good times and career success. But my health took a sudden and irreversible turn so I find myself back in this situation. I don't have the search function available to me yet but I'm sure the community knows OTC pills aren't effective...I didn't have the internet back then, what did I know, thought my plan was foolproof.
So that's it, never had a forum to post this story in before and I've never told it to anyone so there it is. Interestingly years later I found that my dad doesn't seem to remember this happened or he's just blocked it out. I don't blame him.
The dose was one pill and I took 96. Bought two boxes of 48 and swallowed all of them. I was living back home with my parents at the time and they were aware that I was in distress but not about my plan.
After taking the pills I lay down in my bed and expected to die. I don't even think I left a note, my folks would know why I did it, didn't see any reason to say anything else. I don't know exactly how long I was asleep but I woke up at some point and the first thing I noticed was my stomach was bloated. Tapping my fingers on it felt and sounded like a drum. I was also hallucinating...I could clearly see bugs crawling up the wall and also our cat sitting on my bookshelf, though the cat had died about a year prior. I lay in that condition for a while and then I heard my dad downstairs in the kitchen getting ready for work.
I got out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom and puked. Many of the pills came up undigested. I thought my dad must have heard the commotion so I went downstairs and told him what I'd done. We went to the hospital where they had me drink charcoal and then a doctor came into the room and angrily asked why I'd taken so many pills. I explained my situation but he wasn't sympathetic, just made me say I wouldn't do it again and discharged me.
I'd since scraped out a life for myself, even had some good times and career success. But my health took a sudden and irreversible turn so I find myself back in this situation. I don't have the search function available to me yet but I'm sure the community knows OTC pills aren't effective...I didn't have the internet back then, what did I know, thought my plan was foolproof.
So that's it, never had a forum to post this story in before and I've never told it to anyone so there it is. Interestingly years later I found that my dad doesn't seem to remember this happened or he's just blocked it out. I don't blame him.
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