Venting Suicidal Ideation Flip Flopping

[IHurtTheOneILove]

I'm so frustrated that I survived my OD attempt. Had I put my dog outside my room I'd be gone still. I wouldnt have any choice to regret because I'd be dead.

I want to attempt again, with something pretty much guranteed like a gun. But I'm too afraid to now. The thought of infinite nothing scares me and while I know it's inevitable I wanna keep kicking a little maybe? Also what if CTB by firearm hurts. I know everyone says if you hit the brainstem you instantly die but what if they're wrong. No one can know for sure, it's too many loose ends for me to be comfortable dying rn.

Granted I'm maybe just on an upward mood swing, but right now I'm too afraid to die. But I also loathe the fact I have to live.

I HATE THIS

 

[DarkThoughts]

How are you feeling physically after your OD? I understand the frustration, and I hope you're able to find peace.

 

[IHurtTheOneILove]

How are you feeling physically after your OD? I understand the frustration, and I hope you're able to find peace.

I'm feeling okay, definitely got super lucky bcus I came out unscatched

 

[DarkThoughts]

I'm feeling okay, definitely got super lucky bcus I came out unscatched

That's good to hear. ODs always run the risk of nasty permanent damage, so I'm glad you avoided that.