Suicidal again

[SpaxeZ]

This time for reasons out of my control. For such a long time about 8 years since 20 I was actively suicidal and depressed even failed hanging myself once. The reason was a mistake I did when I was 20 that injured myself to point of going nearly impotent. I then came to get in relationship with a girl I had crush on for a long time and that was and still is best thing that happened in my life. She is so understanding, gave me hope and filled in a spot in life that since she stepped into my life my problem became irrelevant even improved to a great degree and I met with doctors having came to a permanent implant solution. It was like the best time of my life this year I even found a route to get into dental school after having quit med school in 20 due to having been depressed over my injury but today all of those dreams and hopes got shattered.. The country I resided in has just passed a law that blocks me from following that path.. It even affects my right to maybe even stay here.. So after 2 years here I am again super suicidal. I was I were never born in the first place. I did give life my best try, I tried i really did but now see all my goals and dreams be shattered by one signature and passing of a single inhumane law. All in one night. I don't like any other major and can't see myself working as anything else therefore this time I might actually do it. This law can even ruin my relationship and I feel so devastated. Nobody understands me. Worst of all my IP is banned by reddit due to sharing a stupid bank referral. Before I could talk to people on suicidewatch but now I can't anymore

 

[Secro]

Sounds like shit, I hope you find something that makes you want to live again.