And it's still why I blame myself for my assaults when they inevitably happened. I let them happen. I allowed the things that led up to them.
hey, it wasn't your fault. not writing it just for the sake of writing but i really mean it. i know i can't be in your shoes, i can't feel what all you've felt and even if you didn't describe it as much as you did, i know i would have felt bad about things. nah, not about you or your situation, but by feeling bad i refer to this feeling of anger that's inside of me after hearing these things each time i hear them. undoubtedly, girls have it harder and..we all know the reasons. i just hope i could've empathized but that ain't really smth i m good at.
although..as i kept reading what you wrote, it just gave me a sense that you now have a good control over your life, or atleast you try to have that. it's beautiful to know that you never let go off your past and still are standing straight not jut for yourself but a lot of people who suffer like you. idk if it makes any difference but, if i could have said it to you in person i would've said i m proud of uh lady.
also, maybe go a little easy on your partner, i mean, if he seems good enough. ik you might have had pretty much the same experiences with all men but " love " does change people, makes them what they aren't at times. so yea, although, you know better.
and kudos to holding yourself so well !