so many people have to die. so many people who have families and want to keep living get killed. why the fuck am i alive? im literally useless

[bigwomanbigwoman123]

im nothing more thaan a burden

 

[F@#$]

I know, I almost get jealous when I hear about someone getting killed.

 

[picklealex]

i wish I could give my life to them, they want to live and I don't.

 

[SecretDissociation]

I think about this everyday and have yet to find an answer... Death is so mysterious but also it is just death, a measly annoying process that comes and goes without warning. Who knows who it will kill next

 

[AInilam]

It's such a cruel joke, and it's always really good people who wanted to live the most. Everything is so backwards, it almost feels like it's done by design.

 

[fxxhan175]

I think about this constantly. So many good people dying by freak accidents, cancer, as victims of war etc. and if I could, I would trade my life for theirs in a heartbeat. Bit morbid, but when I heard of my grandmother's passing two years ago I was overcome by a sense of jealousy. Which sounds absolutely psychotic I know, but I think a few of you could relate. I didn't shed a tear at her funeral because I knew she was finally at peace, in heaven, and no longer suffering. I've spent every night since I was at least 17 praying I wouldn't wake in the morning but am still here taking up space, while other people who so desperately want to LIVE are robbed of that opportunity. I will be ctb soon and I wish I could just trade spots with someone so it wouldn't feel so much like a waste of life. Like I'm actually doing something good and useful for once.

 

[Celerity]

Years ago, I almost died in a narrowly-avoided head-on collision when a drunk driver came across the median. Within that same year, a single mother with young children lost her life from a head-on collision. It's really not fair. I didn't think it was then, and I still don't. I was supremely "lucky" and simply had a scary moment with zero wear and tear on my car.

She, a woman with multiple people who depended on her, had to die. I, a useless 20-something with a massive chip on my shoulder who wanted to die, was spared. Where's the logic in that?

 

[Aim]

I ask myself the same. If it was possible to give away my life. So that someone else that was healthy could live. I would do it immediately.

Actually I wished it was allowed with assisted suicide. Because then they could actually use some of my body to save someone else.

 

[rozeske]

When i was wishing to die before having to do it my self, the son of a relative died of a car crush. I was so jealous I cried so hard, I never even met the guy!

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah, I used to feel this guilt too. There was a lady at work who had children and cancer and I thought how unjust it all was that I would be quite willing to die now and feel trapped here and she was desperate to survive. Life is messed up.