SN is finally in my hands

[AlternativeBagel]

Follow up on my previous post. Shipping was pretty quick and it was supposed to be delivered Friday but i gave the wrong phone number so I had to go pick it up myself today.

Anyway, it feels freeing to finally have it in my hands. Knowing that when the day I decide to die comes i can just do it. I even have the anti nausea meds ready. Like I said in my last post though I'm actually still kinda enjoying life at the moment, but i know it'll wear off. I plan on doing this on impulse, which ironically is one of the reasons why I want to CTB (no impulse control). I recently learned that I've had undiagnosed and untreated ADHD and apparently impulsive suicide is really common. I'll be seeking treatment for it and see if my ideation fades but I doubt it.

 

[tbroken]

Did you search for benzos also?

 

[SadTitan]

Follow up on my previous post. Shipping was pretty quick and it was supposed to be delivered Friday but i gave the wrong phone number so I had to go pick it up myself today.

Anyway, it feels freeing to finally have it in my hands. Knowing that when the day I decide to die comes i can just do it. I even have the anti nausea meds ready. Like I said in my last post though I'm actually still kinda enjoying life at the moment, but i know it'll wear off. I plan on doing this on impulse, which ironically is one of the reasons why I want to CTB (no impulse control). I recently learned that I've had undiagnosed and untreated ADHD and apparently impulsive suicide is really common. I'll be seeking treatment for it and see if my ideation fades but I doubt it.

happy for you, Im still on my journey to find some and look forward to having that same feeling as you do, knowing you have a way out sounds so nice.

 

[voidstar]

I have Borderline along with ADHD and yes, can't agree more with the impulsive part. Glad you finally have everything you need!

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Congrats! Having a method at hand must be so relieving!

Regarding an impulsive attempt with SN, I would say attempting with SN impulsively is counterproductive. You need many hours to prepare for it incl. fasting according to the proven protocols. This will reduce the chances to fail.

 

[voidstar]

Congrats! Having a method at hand must be so relieving!

Regarding an impulsive attempt with SN, I would say attempting with SN impulsively is counterproductive. You need many hours to prepare for it incl. fasting according to the proven protocols. This will reduce the chances to fail.

Gotta agree, as tempting as it is but SN requires some preparations beforehand and it's important for a successful CTB to do them. Otherwise you might end up failing :( I know it's fuckin hard to control these impulses but it's better if you do in this case.
I'm not sure if this gets posted as a new post or added to my previous one but I found that my ADHD meds help with the impulsive part. It takes of the edge and makes them less intense. So getting a doctor for that is a good decision, really. Just gotta remember to take them

 

[AlternativeBagel]

Yep I read the guide. By impulse i suppose i mean like within 24 hours. I still bought a bunch of expensive stuff that I wanna give out to my friends before CTB so it's not full impulse. I want at least one thing good to have come out of this hellish life i got dealt.

Congrats! Having a method at hand must be so relieving!

Regarding an impulsive attempt with SN, I would say attempting with SN impulsively is counterproductive. You need many hours to prepare for it incl. fasting according to the proven protocols. This will reduce the chances to fail.

 

[voidstar]

Yep I read the guide. By impulse i suppose i mean like within 24 hours. I still bought a bunch of expensive stuff that I wanna give out to my friends before CTB so it's not full impulse. I want at least one thing good to have come out of this hellish life i got dealt.

That's definitely a nice sentiment for your friends, just be mindful not to put yourself in debt - or too much debt - that way in case you fail your attempt. Not that I'm assuming you will, but it would suck to deal with that after suddenly coming back.

 

[arthurkuzechov]

Follow up on my previous post. Shipping was pretty quick and it was supposed to be delivered Friday but i gave the wrong phone number so I had to go pick it up myself today.

Anyway, it feels freeing to finally have it in my hands. Knowing that when the day I decide to die comes i can just do it. I even have the anti nausea meds ready. Like I said in my last post though I'm actually still kinda enjoying life at the moment, but i know it'll wear off. I plan on doing this on impulse, which ironically is one of the reasons why I want to CTB (no impulse control). I recently learned that I've had undiagnosed and untreated ADHD and apparently impulsive suicide is really common. I'll be seeking treatment for it and see if my ideation fades but I doubt it.

Congrats! I'm very happy for you and that your long journey will be end at peace soon

 

[AlternativeBagel]

That's definitely a nice sentiment for your friends, just be mindful not to put yourself in debt - or too much debt - that way in case you fail your attempt. Not that I'm assuming you will, but it would suck to deal with that after suddenly coming back.

In a completely different country now where they can't come after me. Even if I fail my attempt or decide to continue living i know I can do it here. I have enough in my account for a full year here without any income, so it gives me time to find a job as well should I recover.

 

[rozeske]

Am happy for you and I wish you luck with it, if and when you decide to use it. I agree with what the others said, SN needs a thought out preparation to not fail. So atleast try and make it a prepared impulsive one if that makes sense

 

[voidstar]

Am happy for you and I wish you luck with it, if and when you decide to use it. I agree with what the others said, SN needs a thought out preparation to not fail. So atleast try and make it a prepared impulsive one if that makes sense

Makes perfect sense! It's something I also have to consider because I know my CTB might be impulsive or rather has a high chance to be, made considering methods even harder and you need to prepare more.

 

[justcallmeJ]

im glad you got the sn. When i got it i got some more willpower to recover, it eventually failed for me but i hope it does for you <3

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand why you'd feel so relieved to have that option, best wishes.