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Sitting in my truck with a 12ga
Thread starterits-about-time
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I have 00 buckshot currently. I like the idea of buckshot because it makes me less afraid of fucking up. I didn't know there were hollow point shotgun shells, are they slugs?
I have 00 buckshot currently. I like the idea of buckshot because it makes me less afraid of fucking up. I didn't know there were hollow point shotgun shells, are they slugs?
Hollow point bullets are slugs, but they expand on impact. I'm thinking hollow point bullets could be more lethal. Even if the angle of aim is not that accurate, the expansion would still, very likely, to destory the brain. But yea, I think 00 buckshot is a solid choice, as they are stronger, especially when it comes ro close range shooting (such as ctb...)
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temporal_anchorite, Huntfish34 and MountainMonkey
Hollow point bullets are slugs, but they expand on impact. I'm thinking hollow point bullets could be more lethal. Even if the angle of aim is not that accurate, the expansion would still, very likely, to destory the brain. But yea, I think 00 buckshot is a solid choice, as they are stronger, especially when it comes ro close range shooting (such as ctb...)
It wouldn't destroy everything behind you which would be good if you're doing it where other people are nearby, like in an apartment. At least that's what I've read about hollow points, then don't have much of an exit. I'll have to be outside probably for mine. I'd like to sit in my truck but then my family wouldn't be able to sell it, I don't have much to leave behind but it's something.
Definitely. Maybe exasperated is more accurate. Annoyed that I can't bring myself to do it yet. Deep almost physical sensation of how nothing matters, and it goes both ways… why stay alive, but also why kill myself? If I die it's done and I won't have to decide anymore. But that requires deciding to die. What a clusterfuck.
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Huntfish34, MountainMonkey and Per Ardua Ad Astra
Definitely. Maybe exasperated is more accurate. Annoyed that I can't bring myself to do it yet. Deep almost physical sensation of how nothing matters, and it goes both ways… why stay alive, but also why kill myself? If I die it's done and I won't have to decide anymore. But that requires deciding to die. What a clusterfuck.
I don't feel particularly human to begin with. I don't seem to have the capacity to connect or communicate well. Trying brings massive shitstorms and arguments. I can give love easily but rarely feel it in return… people love me, but I can't seem to feel that emotionally. It's torture. For so long. I'm separated from the world by an invisible one-way mirror or something. It's gotten to a point where anything meaningful just feels disgusting and pointless, like I don't even want it anymore.
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temporal_anchorite, MountainMonkey, Conker and 2 others
I apologize for veering off topic, but I cannot wrap my head around the fact that no matter how many people may kill themselves with a gun (and/or kill others), the legislation on firearms in the US will never budge because of it, while pentobarbital remains more than forbidden. It makes so little sense to me.
And acquiring a shotgun and bullets is probably cheaper than pentobarbital.
I apologize for veering off topic, but I cannot wrap my head around the fact that no matter how many people may kill themselves with a gun (and/or kill others), the legislation on firearms in the US will never budge because of it, while pentobarbital remains more than forbidden. It makes so little sense to me.
And acquiring a shotgun and bullets is probably cheaper than pentobarbital.
It is kind of wild. I think about that. The anti suicide legislative agenda is just a way for politicians to have easy wins. When it comes down to it, they don't care— it's only affected families and friends who care and advocate for anti-suicide laws. But guns in this country have way too much history and support to ever be denied. I've been involuntarily held in mental health wards and still had no issue purchasing a shotgun. Those are the laws I suspect will be changed in the near future. They rally to ban less reliable suicide methods, but little is done when it comes to firearms. The biggest issues currently facing firearm laws are regarding mass shooters, not non-violent suicidal folk.
It is kind of wild. I think about that. The anti suicide legislative agenda is just a way for politicians to have easy wins. When it comes down to it, they don't care— it's only affected families and friends who care and advocate for anti-suicide laws. But guns in this country have way too much history and support to ever be denied. I've been involuntarily held in mental health wards and still had no issue purchasing a shotgun. Those are the laws I suspect will be changed in the near future. They rally to ban less reliable suicide methods, but little is done when it comes to firearms. The biggest issues currently facing firearm laws are regarding mass shooters, not non-violent suicidal folk.
All you're going to be missing out on (if those are the right words) is us lot still posting about how utterly miserable and irretrievably fucked our lives are and how we wish we were dead. And, as the late Siegmund Warburg put it, "We should not deceive ourselves into thinking that when we die we shall be remembered intensively for more than a limited number of days — except by a very few people to whom we are bound by the closest ties of friendship and emotional attachment."
Time for my next can of beer. Maybe my liver will do the job for me in the end.
All you're going to be missing out on (if those are the right words) is us lot still posting about how utterly miserable and irretrievably fucked our lives are and how we wish we were dead. And, as the late Siegmund Warburg put it, "We should not deceive ourselves into thinking that when we die we shall be remembered intensively for more than a limited number of days — except by a very few people to whom we are bound by the closest ties of friendship and emotional attachment."
Time for my next can of beer. Maybe my liver will do the job for me in the end.
I've got one who will remember me so intensely. What a beautiful string of words Siegmund wrote. Thank you for sharing. Cheers on that beer, I'm chainsmoking and drinking right along side you.
Thanks for that. It made me feel less alone. You see how isolated I am: even imagining a stranger on the internet drinking at the same time as me is a comfort.
Thanks for that. It made me feel less alone. You see how isolated I am: even imagining a stranger on the internet drinking at the same time as me is a comfort.
I'm from England. I work nights, but tonight was a night off, so I just drank all night like usual. I have nothing else to do on nights off. Nothing to do and no one to do it with. I'll go to sleep.soon.
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Per Ardua Ad Astra, Huntfish34, Ligottian and 1 other person
I'm from England. I work nights, but tonight was a night off, so I just drank all night like usual. I have nothing else to do on nights off. Nothing to do and no one to do it with. I'll go to sleep.soon.
I am okay despite a terrible string of self sabotaging actions this week since I posted this thread. I think I'm just not feeling anything at all. So it feels okay. But it's not. I'm giving myself a couple days break from trying to decide to live or die… I wasn't getting any closer to actually pulling the trigger anyways. Do you have anything to do today?
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GetMeOut, Huntfish34 and Per Ardua Ad Astra
Damn, glad you are okay despite the terrible string. I understand if you don't want to say but what actions did you take ?
I understand that Big time , don't feel much myself these days. Kind of reached a.... complacency with life which is alright but Still very scary to me. I just don't care for much of anything.
Not much, thankfully I just got off from my dumbass job and the idiot dickheads who run it. Now I'm off to the liquor store ... and then who Knows. Flying blind I suppose.
Damn, glad you are okay despite the terrible string. I understand if you don't want to say but what actions did you take ?
I understand that Big time , don't feel much myself these days. Kind of reached a.... complacency with life which is alright but Still very scary to me. I just don't care for much of anything.
Not much, thankfully I just got off from my dumbass job and the idiot dickheads who run it. Now I'm off to the liquor store ... and then who Knows. Flying blind I suppose.
It's a lot and I think I'm better off with the processing I've been doing over it and not sharing much right now. It showed me how little I'm trying to make things better though, I just accept things are awful and this week intentionally made things worse. I'm feeling reflective and more motivated to try to be better and to work harder because I have been acting pathetically. It's easy to be pathetic. I want to be better than that and have to try. So I guess this terrible week has ended in a positive way somehow.
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